All newscasters will convert to Scientology.

The deeply obnoxious word "staycation" will reach an all-time high for usage in the New York Times.

Two words: math stops working.

New UN Secretary General Richard B. Cheney will win the 2010 Nobel Prize for Peace.

The Clintons will finally divorce, and Hillary and Michelle will face constant strife over who is the senior sister-wife.

Two words: math stops working.

I literally just choked on my cookie.

K, I went back in time on the last post....

Dreamland Japan will launch a line of extremely popular "Asian Fusion" fashions, gaining tons of press for it's student creator. :D:D:D (srsly, I want to be teacher's pet)

In world news, the Green Movement will become a sweeping economic issue and the basis for all things commerce. Pie will breathe easy as his carbon footprint, and that of everyone else, is shrunk by corporations prioritizing good earth sense.

You may say that I'm a dreamer...

Along with King of the Hill (already announced), The Simpsons and South Park will also be cancelled, leaving a gaping comedy hole to be filled by nothing but Family Guy clones/spinoffs.

With his new free time, former Vice President Cheney will open up a petting zoo and focus on his new line of canned goods, including Rowdy Dick's Shotgun Chili.

BoringPostcards will quit his job and move to Cali to become designer to the stars.