PANTS RANT →[More:]
OMFG WTF I AM SICK AND TIRED OF PANTS THAT DON'T FUCKING FIT!!! I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THE MARKETING PRATS WHO PANDER TO A BUNCH OF DELUSIONAL FATASSES WHO REFUSE TO JUST FUCKING ADMIT ALREADY THAT THEY'RE A SIZE SIXTEEN OR WHATEVER. I JUST WENT SHOPPING AGAIN LAST NIGHT FOR ROUGHLY THE FIFTEENTH TIME SINCE, OH, LIKE THREE MONTHS AGO WHEN THE LAST OF MY GOOD WORK SLACKS FRAYED AT THE CUFFS. I AM THE SAME SIZE I WAS WHEN I WAS 18 AND PANTS FUCKING FIT BACK THEN. NOW, HOWEVER, EVERY GODDAMN PAIR OF PANTS SOLD IN THE ENTIRE U S OF A APPARENTLY FEELS THE NEED TO ADD 4-6" EXTRA FABRIC IN THE WAIST AND BUTT WHICH MEANS THEY'RE ALL DROOPY-DRAWERS AND PAPER-BAGGEDY EVEN WITH A BELT. AND ITS NOT LIKE I'M SKINNY EITHER COS I'M NOT, I'M A FATASS. BUT THESE SO-CALLED PANTS ARE BEYOND THE PALE. THEY LOOK LIKE ASS, AND THEY MAKE MY ASS LOOK LIKE ASS. AND I CAN'T GO SMALLER COS MY GODDAMN BIKERACER LEGS DONT FIT. I EVEN TRIED SHOPPING IN JUNIORS WHICH HAS ALWAYS WORKED BEFORE BUT APPARENTLY THE ENTIRE TEEN POPULACE OF THE UNITED STATES HAS GOTTEN KNOCKED UP SINCE THE LAST TIME I WENT SHOPPING.
FUCK I HATE SHOPPING.
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHH!!!
*stomps off to book appointment at the tailor*