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28 March 2007

So, what would the world be like if a large red dot appeared on your forehead every time you had an orgasm and lingered for 24 hours? Sadly the post the comment was made in is gone and closed, but it's an interesting question, as well as a great opportunity to make bindi jokes.
I imagine it'd discourage masturbation.
posted by jonmc 28 March | 11:54
Or encourage claims of it..."Why, uh, do I have a dot and my wife doesn't? I, uh, was masturbating, yeah."

Women who are multi-orgasmic would be broken out like a teenage chocoholic.
posted by danostuporstar 28 March | 11:58
It would become more fodder for fueling our neurosis as we compared the number and frequency of our dots to others and pondered what that might mean about our value as people. Too many, too often, too early, too few, never, why her, why him, why me, why not me, how, when? Articles about The Dot would be called out on the cover of women's magazines at supermarket checkouts, and celebrities would flaunt their dots coyly as paparazzi snapped their pictures when they arrived at premeires, fueling even more detailed speculation about their dalliances.

I don't see a lot of positive social enhancement resulting from it.
posted by Miko 28 March | 12:02
An even more horrible place where there are even fewer people willing to recognize that there is a boundary between the public and the private and that some things just should be kept to yourself (which doesn't mean you're ashamed of them or embarrassed by them).

I, for one, would never leave my house again.
posted by crush-onastick 28 March | 12:13
I think that American society would become a little less Puritanical.
posted by Specklet 28 March | 12:24
I somehow doubt that, speck. Not with a built in scarlet letter. Not to mention that there'd be a ton of extremely embarassed teenage boys at breakfast tables every morning.
posted by jonmc 28 March | 12:28
...and girls too, jon.
posted by Miko 28 March | 12:29
Y'all are assuming that this is something that would land like a bomb in our already existing society instead of being a physical thing that evolved along with us. If it was like that, then we would have evolved social mores to go right along with it which might be hats or might be, I don't know, a completely different attitude towards orgasm - perhaps we'd have some taboo about eating around others while sex and orgasm were completely blase. But at any rate we'd certainly take it for granted and it wouldn't freak everyone out.

There's an interesting set of books I read not too long ago & I can't remember the name of the author or the books but anyway they're basically Victorian novels - with dragons as the main characters. That makes them sound horrible, but actually they're hilarious, very well written, and the way polite dragon society has evolved to ignore such small facts of life as eating one's young and changing color when sexually aroused is really interesting.
posted by mygothlaundry 28 March | 12:34
Oh they're by Jo Walton, mgl. I read them as well (on your recommendation, btw!)

Tooth and Claw is the name that comes to mind, for the first one.
posted by gaspode 28 March | 12:35
(actually, on a similar theme, there's a sci-fi novel called City Of Truth where everybody is conditioned-via a painful ritual-to always tell the empirical truth all the time. Natural society is a complete mess. There is an incredibly droll scene involving barroom flirtation, though.

My point is, that sometimes unalloyed frankness isn't neccessarily the best thing)

Miko: not as much as the boys, miko. it's not possible.
posted by jonmc 28 March | 12:36
Sure it is, jon. It's even more possible because we have no recovery phase.

mgl, but we evolved with thighs and boobs and monthly fertility cycles and faces and hair too, and we still manage to focus our sexual anxieties around those things.
posted by Miko 28 March | 13:25
miko, I know it's biologically possible. I'm just saying that there's nothing in the world as strong as the sex drive of a teenage male.
posted by jonmc 28 March | 13:33
Not to mention that there'd be a ton of extremely embarassed teenage boys at breakfast tables every morning.

I don't think so, Jon. I think that even if the red dot was a sudden development in human physiology, society would adjust relatively quickly, and the scenario would be as Miko describes it.

On preview: Except the sex drive of a woman in her early thirties...
posted by Specklet 28 March | 13:36
Except the sex drive of a woman in her early thirties...

The age mismatch is proof that God has a sense of humor.


posted by jonmc 28 March | 13:41
(or just imagine this scenario:

"you see that dot on Junior's head this morning, dear?"
"Hmm. He must've saw the neighbor girl in her bikini again.."

*shudder*
posted by jonmc 28 March | 13:43
Neighbor girl in a bikini? Hell - linoleum would do it for many boys.
posted by plinth 28 March | 14:04
Linoleum? Wind will do the trick at that age.
posted by jonmc 28 March | 14:05
What would it be like if flatulence was visible? Say a purple cloud.
posted by netbros 28 March | 14:46
netbros, I'm glad I'm not the only person who's thought of that!
posted by Specklet 28 March | 15:19
Pick up lines such as, "Hey baby, I'll put a spot on your head."
posted by King of Prontopia 28 March | 15:31
A lot of hats...

City Of Truth is a pretty amusing book, James Morrow in general is great, although I find I can only read most of his books once they certainly stick with you.
posted by edgeways 28 March | 16:29
"New Maybelline Spot Definer! Feel the difference. The reds pop, the pinks pink, and the plums are utterly decadent. Don't be caught without your dot!" *sing-song* Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's Maybelline!
posted by Specklet 28 March | 17:00
It would be cool if the dots changed in size according to the intensity of the orgasm, too. I can imagine that tattoo parlours would do a raging business in applying permanent spots for those with large egos.
posted by dg 29 March | 01:34
What would happen? I'm afraid you guys would just have to get used to calling me "Big Red."
posted by PlanetKyoto 29 March | 10:49
Yeah, honestly, I imagine that the most likely thing would be a bit of makeup that everyone wore (like a bindi) that would cover that spot regardless.
posted by klangklangston 29 March | 16:06
So I || I've been Ho-Boed!

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