MetaChat - Penis! My latest spam email, had to share.

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30 May 2006

Penis! My latest spam email, had to share. →[More:]

Heading:
ARE YOU AFRAID TO VISIT SWIMMING POOLS BECAUSE OF YOUR SMALL PENIS?

Body:
Your pen1$ ]ook$ t0o spongy? M@ke it be@utiful w1th Penis Enl@rge Patch.
http://www.!xxxxxxx.com/pt/xxxxxxxxxxxxx

So if anyone here has a spongy, unbeautiful penis, my email is in my profile and I would be happy to forward this to you.

post by: iconomy at: 13:26 | 20 comments

Spongy Penis?

Somebody trying to market X-Rated household cleaning products?

posted by jonmc 30 May | 13:27

Finally, a name for my affliction. I was always embarrased to tell my friends I had swiss-cheese-dick. But spongy is so comforting, I don't think I even want to be beautiful anymore.

posted by danostuporstar 30 May | 13:31

So what is the ratio of penis-enhancement spam to spam that addresses anything a female might have self-doubts about. . .

What I am getting at is that possibly the spammers have tapped into the most prevalent form of self-coubt, and that women, while not possessing a corner on the brains market, are at least marginally smarter, so as not to fall for stuff like iconomy just kindly pasted. . .

(I had NO idea that my dick could be spongy. . .I have to look into this right away!)

posted by danf 30 May | 13:32

Maybe it's for men with penile spongiform encephilitis.

posted by me3dia 30 May | 13:34

SquareBob SpongePenis.

posted by taz 30 May | 13:41

(danf, it's eleventybillion to 5. You can trust me on this, I've done the research.)

posted by taz 30 May | 13:49

(danf, it's eleventybillion to 5. You can trust me on this, I've done the research.)

But those spammers have not had a gander at my ol' baloney pon. . . . .oops . . .um. . .I'll be over here.

posted by danf 30 May | 13:55

*ganders*

*Sings* My pony has a first name, it's o.s.c.a.r...

Mmmm!! Spongy!

btw, one of the few images that returns in google image search for "spongy penis" (no quotes) is of rabbits! How baloney is that?!

posted by taz 30 May | 14:09

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by danostuporstar 30 May | 14:27

SpongeKnob AiryPants

posted by dodgygeezer 30 May | 14:31

Spongeknob!!

dodgygeezer wins!

(but what does he win? Hm?)

posted by taz 30 May | 14:36

He wins a case of SPUR-M!

Oh this one is even better. I get really great spam. My latest:

Heading:
Your money, nose glasses

Body:
Within the adlt industry, it's no secret porn stars use supplements to help them cum more.

Along with numerous stars that use our product, thousands of men have increased their sperm volume with our formula. If you've ever wanted to cum like a porn star, SPUR-M will get you there.

(We are endorsed by DavyD, renowned in the porn industry for the amount he ejaculates! this is all thanks to SPUR-M)

SPUR-M has an impressive history.

http://xxxxxx.org/dsm/

passion-driven parcel-gilt motto kiss out-of-focus Paris hat obispo pine milk-tested obturator canal noble-couraged nimble-shifting mild-scented nanny plum narrow-fisted nail-cutting
paddle wheel Neo-kantism minute drops musk parrot olive berry ocean-born nigh-hand narrow-streeted muzzle ring mole-eyed nine-pounder parrot cry paper seller octane number oven tit neural tube namby-pamby palm wax oat-bearing nine-spined stickleback one half pale-faced money-spelled pearl hardening mild-aired nut-shelling opus pectineum para-agglutinin parasol ant oleo gear neck journal

So if SPUR-M's good enough for DavyD it should really be good enough for us. Especially those of us with spongy, unbeautiful penises, because we need all the help we can get.

posted by iconomy 30 May | 14:46

Quite a nut-shelling opus, ico.

posted by danostuporstar 30 May | 14:49

The other day I received a good one for the same product, the Penis Enlarge Patch:

"With Penis Enlarge Patch, You Can Use Your Dick As A Scarf!"

On Preview: Damn, iconomy: I just laughed so hard I busted my pine milk-tested obturator canal.

posted by Fuzzy Monster 30 May | 14:51

why isn't it called JIZ-M ?

posted by dodgygeezer 30 May | 14:51

Because it will "spur 'em". You want your sperm to be spurred, don't you?

posted by iconomy 30 May | 15:15

Some men don't, iconomy...

I'm terribly jealous of iconomy's entertaining spam. All I get are adverts for cheap software and fake badges.

posted by flopsy 30 May | 15:20

So, iconomy, shall we take up a collection for extra towels and sheets, for when your partner (if you have one and if it's a *he*) starts coming like a porn star?

posted by danf 30 May | 15:48

But the penis is supposed to be spongy (nsfw in a clinical kind of way unless you have a morbid fear of floating autonomous penii).

posted by porpoise 30 May | 16:12

I've heard of spotted dick, in a can, no less, but spongy penis? A bit nauseating, I'm afraid.

posted by redvixen 30 May | 19:18

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