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25 August 2020

Winston makes me sad. [More:]Winston is the best dawg ever. He's 10 now, and starting to slow down a bit. It makes me sad that he can't live forever. He's got arthritis in one of his paws so he walks with a limp.... a bad one when he first gets up, just a little hitch in his step if he's excited.

He's my favorite of all the dogs we've had (about 8 if I'm counting right). He's smart and loyal and protective and goofy. He still acts like a puppy sometimes. But he's clearly slowing down. It's horrifying watching it because he seems to know he's not as capable as he once was and he's sad about it.

My view of the relationship between dogs and their people is that to them we are akin to a god: An eternal presence that was there when they were babies, and when they grow old we are relatively unchanged. But as a god I feel like I'm failing him. I can't make his arthritis go away, I can't make him young again.

I've put enough dogs down to know that if we have to do that with Winston it will affect me deeply. And maybe in considering his mortality, the prospect of my own mortality isn't that far away.

But he just had his physical and according to the vet he's doing fine for a dog his age aside from the arthritis. So I will enjoy day he can spend with us, even if the knowledge that his best days are behind him makes me a little melancholy.
Aww, these times are melancholy, at best, so that makes it even more likely to steel yourself for precious ones slowly slipping away.

You're a great doggie person and you know how to extend your heart to others. I hope you can focus on the now and present for Winston and share the love of a very good boy.

posted by mightshould 25 August | 06:24
Every day you give him is his best day, if he knows you love him.
posted by Senyar 25 August | 10:49
I do.

I'm feeling better today. For some reason yesterday I kind of focused on Winston's decline. Actually I know the reason: Some friends of mine had two dogs- litter mates- and they had to put one of them down this week just shy of his 5th birthday because he had cancer. That, on top of Winston's aging, just kind of brought it to the surface.

We had an awesome 2.8 mile walk this evening. He may be slowing down (and so am I) but it was a good walk.

I knew I could bare my soul here and get support. I love the bunnies of Mecha.
posted by Doohickie 25 August | 23:46
Hugs Doohickie. I just went through that with one of my colony cats. Pan is over ten years old and that is pretty amazing for a feral but I sat looking at her cleaning in the sun and I just fear her going through another winter.

I guess the transient nature of life is what gives love its beauty but thinking about it can be a punch to the chest.

Virtual scritch for Winston. /////
posted by arse_hat 26 August | 00:03
Oh arse. You have a poetic heart.
posted by Doohickie 26 August | 22:56
Enjoy every day. Every day is a gift.
posted by Miko 28 August | 22:16
MeCha Homecoming Weekend || Mesmer-azing