It is sad. I always had a sort of wary feel about him - I loved Kitchen Confidential and really enjoyed "Parts Unkown," but I think I also recognized enough darkness in him to feel some concern. He reminds me of so many men I've known with a difficult mix of heart/yearning and anger/frustration with the world. One thing I really appreciated about him was that he was a living demonstration of personal growth - following his nose into an amazing culinary career, then trying out writing and then a book, then trying out TV, and then bringing his TV work far beyond food porn and more and more in line with humane values and a message about love and tolerance. It's so important to see people like that who keep exploring what they can do with their lives, and keep deepening their understanding. I will miss his presence very much.

From Kitchen Confidential on he always seemed pretty vulnerable but over the years he seemed to be finding a place or role he could live with. It is so sad that could not hold.

As with Avichi I wonder if travel had a role in the decision to end their lives. When you are moving around a lot and sleeping in rentals all the time, even if they are very nice places, you can get detached from the world.

A peripatetic life can be fun and introduce you to great people and things but I think most people need a root place to stay connected to something in order to feel a true part of the wider world.

The other recent high profile loss, Kate Spade, does not really fit that idea. Depression is just horrible.

I saw this interesting video: Anthony Bourdain tries the Waffle House https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cX_kbIVxl_o

The romantic way he and his companion describe it as a place that accepts everyone regardless of their background, inebriation, etc reminded me of this from Ebert: https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/swingers-1996

"Sometimes I get this Whitmanesque vision of America. But instead of wheat fields and mighty cities and deep lakes stretching from sea to sea, I imagine a vast number of coffee shops. ... the new American frontier is the all-night diner, with Formica tops and ketchup and sugar on every table, and a waitress who writes down your order on a green and white Guest Check."

I am still so sad about this. I loved his shows, and I always hoped I'd bump into him on my infrequent forays on the Upper West Side. On this recent visit to NYC, I couldn't even go to the UWS, as I knew it was pointless (notwithstanding that I love that area anyway, but it was just too much for me).