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05 April 2016

Name some movies that totally lost you less than halfway through. Either in the movie theater or at home. Can be for any reason: too boring, obscure, violent, sexual, etc.[More:]Here are mine:

Watership Down (the 1978 one)
Wag the Dog (dragged too much)
Waterworld
Cable Guy
The Fisher King (dragged, had trouble following the plot thread)
Spiderman 2
Bliss (1985), my family dragged me to this as a teen and I just couldn't follow it at all

For the last, I watched it in the theater but didn't leave, instead I just completely tuned out and totally didn't remember the scenes my family was talking about later. (Why do I remember these obscure things??)

This should not be a list of "yeah, I heard it was a bad movie and it sure was bad" but a movie that you genuinely were interested in seeing, but just couldn't get into it and stopped watching less than halfway through.

Tell me yours!
LOTR. I watched an hour of the first one and was bored stiff.
Citizen Kane. Most. Overrated. Film. Ever. There. I said it.
Spaghetti westerns, seen one, seen them all.
James Bond films. Ditto.
Memento. I know it's meant to be genius, but I had no f'ing idea what was going on.
posted by Senyar 05 April | 15:43
Once Upon a Time in the West (very slow, hard to follow, cruelty)
Broken Flowers (very slow, main character uninteresting)
Moulin Rouge (people seemed to be screaming for no reason)
Howard's End (charming early on, then nothing but depressing)

Two of these I was forced to see to the end, because I was foolish enough to go the theater with other people who wouldn't leave.
posted by JanetLand 05 April | 16:05
Pretty much any Terrence Malick film that I've tried to watch just lose my interest and they seem just like perfume or denim commercials that go on for 2.5 hours. They are pretty to look at, but end up being ho hum, and never seem to have the sort of impact on me that I think TM is hoping to have on his audience.
posted by Foxhat 05 April | 16:21
I love the spy thriller espionage genre, but I can't bear James Bond movies because of the sickeningly casual violence and misogyny. Bond's a sociopath: he kills people, and then he goes and has a cocktail and jokes about it. I've yet to see an entire Bond movie because of this.

I watched Trainwreck even though I don't tend to watch romantic comedies because I thought it might be something different, and it wasn't. I won't say I didn't get any laughs out of it at all, but I kept looking at the tracker the entire time to see how much longer it would take to finish up. I don't really get the Amy Schumer thing. To me she's just a moderately talented actress and comedian.

Every Woody Allen movie I've ever seen, which must be half a dozen or so. I find them unrelatable and unfunny. I simply cannot understand why Allen is so acclaimed. After I recently watched Annie Hall and didn't so much as smile once, I decided that, especially given what we know about Allen's personal life, that I should just do what both my conscience and personal tastes were telling me to do and stop watching them completely.
posted by Orange Swan 05 April | 16:44
Totally agree the: Woody Allen. I don't know if I've ever made it through a Woody Allen movie.
posted by amro 05 April | 17:43
RAY, the Ray Charles biopic. Just seemed like an overly long impersonation. Plus his story is kinda boringly predictable.
posted by mullacc 05 April | 17:51
Art School Confidential. Worst movie I've ever seen. So ugly at heart.
posted by Miko 05 April | 19:41
Guardians of the Galaxy. I've been on a Marvel movie kick lately and so that's one of theirs but goddamn, I can't get more than 10 minutes in before I want to switch to something else.

Sherlock Holmes. The one with RDJ. A friend recommended it and I fell asleep while watching it twice so I just gave up on it.
posted by sperose 05 April | 19:43
Monster's Ball. So violent! Went worth a group of college friends. I think we all but one ended up walking out before it was over.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 05 April | 19:57
Blazing Saddles. I know there are more but that's the big one that comes to mind.
posted by bluesapphires 05 April | 20:14
My all time winner for this category is Last Tango in Paris. How I hated that movie. Ugly, sexist, gross. I beat feet at the half way point, and I never do that.

I disliked the previews for Guardians, sperose, so I've taken a pass on even sampling it.

I've also tried Man of Steel a few times on TV and cannot get interested.

I admit I have in the past liked Woody Allen quite a lot, though I found some of his praised movies like Zelig and Purple Rose of Cairo to be a snore, but I haven't paid money to see one since he married his stepdaughter. I also find his daughter's claims he molested her very credible.

posted by bearwife 05 April | 21:33
Totally agree, Foxhat. My husband loves Terrence Malick films, and (with the exception of Badlands, which I do genuinely really like) I just glaze over. At least they are pretty to look at?

Also, sacrilege in my group of friends, but I get very impatient with David Lynch films. I couldn't even tell you why. I don't mind films that are difficult to watch, that are reasonably opaque and require another viewing or some thinking afterward... I just feel like his films are less than the sum of their parts, somehow, but I can't articulate why.
posted by gaspode 06 April | 08:25
Oh, and I didn't get very far trying to watch Downton Abbey -- I didn't even last one episode. Everybody seemed up to their eyebrows in problems right from the get-go.
posted by JanetLand 06 April | 09:47
Oh, I totally forgot about Howard's End! I was excited to watch it after enjoying "A Room with a View," but was really disappointed and the whole plot started out depressing and got worse.
posted by Melismata 06 April | 10:24
Titanic. I didn't have huge expectations of it, but I thought it'd be tolerable. WRONG.
posted by altolinguistic 06 April | 10:58
The first Hulk. Terrible. Second one's good, though. And Star Trek V (the one Shatner directed). I'm a big Star Trek fan, but I couldn't take that one. Bad dialogue badly delivered. And don't hate me, but I never did see what all the fuss was about with Star Wars. Still want to see the latest, though.

(I loved Monster's Ball, though, thought it was brilliant. And Blazing Saddles I've seen like a million times. That cowboy fart scene just never stops being funny-- pips just pawn in game of life. ; )
posted by Pips 06 April | 13:01
Battlefield Earth. The only movie I've ever left the theatre before it was over. I was with a group of friends so I tried to sleep through it, but even that was unbearable.
posted by apoch 06 April | 18:48
Tim Burton's Planet of the Apes. I'm pretty sure that I dozed off in the theater for that one.

Batman vs. Superman. Such a mess.

The last Hunger Games. I liked the first three but the last one was just so weirdly paced and talky that I got frustrated halfway through.

Say Anything. I'm watching all of Roger Ebert's Great Movies and I have no idea what he saw in that. I got about 45 minutes in and gave up in disgust. Almost Famous is the only Cameron Crowe film that I like at all.
posted by octothorpe 07 April | 13:49
I'm going to be pummeled with this one, but...Reservoir Dogs. Just too damned gratuitous and sadistic for my tastes.
Also, Titanic and Avatar. But, for different reasons than RD, of course. Like, being boring as hell, for instance.
posted by Thorzdad 07 April | 14:34
I can't stand James Cameron either; I walked out of The Abyss.
posted by brujita 07 April | 17:54
Twilight. I was dating a guy who was a huge fan of this movie (big red flag, there) and we settled in to watch it. I was bored out of my skull in half an hour. I tried for another twenty minutes, but I seriously was ready to just head home, it was that awful.

I don't see all that many movies, so Bridesmaids was another non-hit with me. Everyone had raved about it, so I watched it..I honestly did not find it very funny at all. Some parts, perhaps, but really, I didn't like it at all.

I guess this is why I stick to the animated type movies. I generally like most of them.
posted by redvixen 08 April | 18:26
Seconding LOTR
posted by Obscure Reference 10 April | 09:51
OMG: PARKOUR BUNNY || Beverly Cleary is 100 today.

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