Hell no. I still don't know what I want to be yet.

No. I shudder to think what my parents might have chosen for me.

No. What if I chose something I thought they'd be good at and enjoy, only to find out they were the next great thing in art or music or astronomy or genetics?

Hells no! But if I did have a say, I'd want to ensure that she didn't get a science PhD because fuck that shit.

Nope. I didn't even figure out what I wanted to do until I was in my 30s. I wouldn't try to predict field what my hypothetical child would be suited to pursue.

I rarely put the kid in school. Pick his profession? Heh. Nope.

I have to admit, because I worry that journalism is a dwindling (but still badly needed) field, I'd be tempted. But I couldn't impose a choice like that on the kid... it's too central to a person's happiness to be in a line of work that they actually enjoy.

No. No no no. Hell no.

Yes, because I would pick wealthy sponsor of the arts who keeps winning the lottery.

Definitely not. I know my parents would have made the wrong choice for me.

NO. My mother decided I should be an engineer when I was a freshman in high school (because I got an A in Honors Algebra I - I'm good at teh maths!). She thought it would be a good, steady job (unlike journalism, which was what I wanted to do at the time). I am not an engineer. I did marry one, though. But, no. Jeoc Jr. has to find her own path.

Sure... an astronaut; doctor; pilot; senator; supreme court justice; actor; musician -- provided they have the talent and interest (I wouldn't want them to do something they didn't enjoy). But if I could ensure a good life for them in that way, why not?

Y'all are just a bunch of hippies, that's what. ; )

(Jon, by the way, votes for ninja.)

Can I arrange my kid's marriage instead?

No, no, no.

I would and could choose my child's profession! Mine is 20, and it is still my strongest desire that he put his natural-born language skills to work and use them as a translator/interpreter.

My kid wants to be nothing and everything at the same time - what better profession might suit him than my own? He is naturally gifted with three languages, why WOULDN'T he use that to make a living? His parents grew up tri-lingual and made a living out of it, why shouldn't he?!?!?!?

Instead, you are a surfer/pothead/skirt-chasing knowitall? What kind of life is that (your mother wants to know?).

*Sigh* Can you tell I am bitter? IF YOU SPEAK TWO OR MORE ROMANCE LANGUAGES PLUS ENGLISH FOR GOD'S SAKE?!?! BE A F*&$^$NG TRANSLATOR!!!!!!

No, I would not. My parents never put that pressure on me, and I am very grateful for that. It seems like a basic component of unconditional love to me.

Heh, good answer Ardiril.

I hope that my daughter will keep on engaging with the world. Not withdraw at some stage discouraged.
I think that's my main concern.
In the process of being engaged with people, with the world she'll learn what gives her energy and makes her happy (in the short term and in the long term) and what she's good at, what works for her in the world she lives in.
She's 2.5 btw so it's rather academical at this point.

I do remember talking to our au pair. An american young woman using a between year as an au pair to work out what she wanted to do, what kind of education to follow, what kind of career to pursue.
And it struck me that even looking back with the knowledge I have now I found it hard to give advice.
The main thing is to create a positive feedback loop between yourself and the world. Which depends on what works for you and what works in the situation of the world.
And I think that interplay is hard to predict for anybody.
So the gist of my advice was to choose an education and first job that would be a good basis for getting more experiences and new opportunities.

Instead, you are a surfer/pothead/skirt-chasing knowitall? What kind of life is that (your mother wants to know?).

Heh. Where do I sign up? :)

(Maybe he's taking his retirement first. Usually that lifestyle dries up when the funding dries up. I didn't really stand on my own until after my father died and I finally HAD to support myself -- not to assume yours is not, necessarily.)

Negative. I have enough trouble making my own decisions. Right now my son, who is 25, is doing a hell of a lot better than I was at his age.

Oh....no. I can't see why I would do that.

The main thing is to create a positive feedback loop between yourself and the world. Which depends on what works for you and what works in the situation of the world.

That's wonderfully put. I also perceive a danger in having parents pick, because the world the kids grow up into is going to have different possibilities and opportunities than the one their parents made career decisions in. I'm somewhat in awe of my peers who are in professions that simply did not exist when we were going to guidance counseling (ha) in high school, and of people of all ages who have forged their own path and created entrepreneurial careers in for-profit and non-profit environments that were not imagined by anyone. Sure, you could recommend something, but more important, to me, is instilling that sense of possibility, of being able to listen to yourself and observe yourself realistically and to articulate goals, even if they're short-term at first or in times of transition. When kids have that, career choices take care of themselves.

And it does take some people a longer time to find a clear path. I know many, many people - myself included, probably - who didn't really settle on a focused career path until they were in their 30s and in some cases 40s. Those people are all doing well, in my view. They brought a lot of life experience and maturity to their decisions about career, and their process of gradually searching and building their plans in the 'positive feedback loop' often results in career decisions that have made those people happier than others who went with what they started right after college.
Some people have the gift of knowing what they want to do early on, but not everyone does. And not everyone is exposed to the career possibilities that point the best way forward for them until later on in life.

How could you tell at birth what a child's talents would be? If I could have chosen a profession for my child, and my choice would ensure that my child was a good student, I'd be tempted, but what if I chose astronaut, when my child should have been a very happy cellist? Or what if I chose bookstore owner, and 20 years later, the coolest jobs are in a field not yet imagined? My parents could not have imagined the jobs in computing, and bookstores are dying in droves. You just can't control your child's future.

No, I wouldn't. Because, time has shown that I had no ability to adequately foresee the future for myself. There's no way I could be able to pick a career for my kid that would be guaranteed to exist by the time they grew up.

Yes, and I'd also like to choose the sex, the height, weight, distribution of the five sensual inputs, aesthetics, worldview, ethical stance, need for exercise, menstrual cycle and/or pubescent determinants, length of penis or girth of breast, color of eyes, hair, and general musculature.

From there I'd also like to be in charge of their range of motion, handedness, athletic ability and overall grace.

Once that's settled, I'd have to weigh in on sleeping/waking patterns and sexual orientation.

His or her name would be Poppet.