My husband!

But if not him.....my sister.

Which one, TPS?

TPS has more than one husband?

My mother.

The Bear to whom I am married, no question.

Sarah Palin

Well, since Lee is in China, I'll take Sarah. If this were a world where Lee came back... then I'd have to pretend they were Siamese twins and take both.

A piano playing math professor, preferably from GIT or MIT.

Does it have to be a person? I can't choose my dog?

Fuck this book of questions...

The guy I'm dating (not so nutty as it may sound given the short amount of time this has been going on; we've been friends for three years and dated before a couple of years ago). We get along well and have a good physical relationship. At the end of the two years either all problems would be solved or I'd be ready to be done with him.

My stuffed Donkey, Donkey T. Donkey.

Dogs are people, ufez, I say you can choose your dog.

My husband, to be sure. Or... Hugh Jackman.

Yeah there should be a "no significant others" clause, otherwise this is a little predictable. So yeah first choice is SO, second choice is sister, third choice would be probably some random person who I have always wondered what made them tick.

Or should there be a "no people who aren't alive" clause? Because then I'd pick my father, because, duh, I'd like to see him again.

Okay, then here's my new pick: Zach Braff.

First choice is the mister, second choice is my long-dead sister, and third would be my gay brother (I have four, it's important to specify) because we get along awesomely.

If I take my wife, then the kid doesn't have any parents. But if I take the kid, she grows up as the weird kid who spent two years with her Dad in a frozen shelter. So I'd leave them both at home, even though that would really suck.

Can I take someone famous? I bet Kelley Deal is fun to hang out with.

Or yeah, my sister. That's a better choice than Kelley Deal.

You know, I might say someone I could play music with.

My partner, or else my friend T., the red-headed truck driver I've always wanted to be snowed in with. RAWR.

If The Whelk's going with his stuffed Donkey, then I'd want Hobbes (of "Calvin &" fame). But stuffed anythings aside, not having anybody I'm really close to on the Physical Plane, and not wanting to be really creepy suggesting certain MeFites or MeChans, I'm thinking of having one of the many really cool female webcomickers (Shaenon Garrity, Kate Beaton, Meredith Gran, Danielle Corsetto, Spike Trotman [yes, a she], Jennie Breedon, Magnolia Porter, Jessica Hagy, Ursula Vernon, Jenn Manley Lee, Jennifer Babcock, Rene Engström, Sydney Padua, Angela Melick, or one of my latest discoveries Mary Cagle, Faith Erin Hicks and Rina Piccolo, whew, I'd forgotten just how many excellently comicky ladies are doing web stuff), but of course, only for the purpose of teaching me how to draw, which considering how much my brain has been shrinking lately, would take up the entire two years. Honest! It would have to be someone currently doing an online comic, just to prevent any possibility of me spending two years with Cathy Guisewite. (Ack!) Okay, there's one dude webcomicker I might choose, Jonathan Rosenberg, but only to force him to finish his Epic Saga at Goats.com (and quit trying to kill off Brock Stalkley, my favorite character). Yep, I am in such a webcomicky mood, and I'm sure it'll last the entire two years.

I dunno, I kinda think the option to choose (or, more tellingly, not to choose) one's partner is reasonable. There's no question I'd choose The Fella, but that in itself illuminates something for me: I can't think of a previous romantic relationship where that choice would be so clear, where I wouldn't have second thoughts. That tells me something (something REALLY REALLY GOOD) about my marriage and my partner.

But if no partners are allowed, then: my friend C. We've known each other for ages so we have lots of shared history. We've lived at a distance long enough to have developed lots of unshared stories to tell, too. He's one of my favorite people in the world, incredibly brilliant, and hilariously funny --- and he thinks similarly well of me. We have a pleasant but harmless flirtation that makes interaction fun, but no serious sexual tension that could make long companionship tempting or troubling.

And one tiny, bittersweet factor: he was also dear friends with my late partner during a particularly colorful period of our lives, so we'd get to share some old stories, stories I haven't heard or shared in a long time.

And, now that I'm thinking this through, C's also the only person I know well who's actually been through an extended period in Antarctica. I, uh, didn't factor that in, but it does seem sensible!

If I have to take a famous person, I'll take.... someone pretty. Kevin Zegers, maybe.

If we're excluding spouses, then I'll have to take my kitty.

I wouldn't say my significant other (if I had one), because that's a heck of a way to get sick of your favorite person.

But since you said Antarctic, I'm going with Wilford Brimley.

Well, if I can't take elizard, then I pick a magical genie who pees Guinness stout and poops delicious homemade chocolate chip pecan cookies. And who brought an Xbox360.

One: Definitely the mister.
Two: If it can't be him, then it would be Oliver. He's such a character he'd keep me entertained.
Three: Famous person would be Craig Ferguson. Obviously, the entertainment factor is important.

Fucking MacGyver

Fuck it. I want The Whelk.