MetaChat - Things That Should Exist But Do Not

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29 April 2010

Things That Should Exist But Do Not

post by: mygothlaundry at: 13:37 | 32 comments

A Shonen Knife cover of Sugar, Sugar by the Archies.

Flushing outdoor toilets for dogs.

posted by mygothlaundry 29 April | 13:37

Bruce Springsteen covering "He's a Rebel" by the Crystals. Just change the gender and the arena goes up in flames.

posted by danf 29 April | 13:41

Whatya mean change the gender?

posted by The Whelk 29 April | 13:50

A Joan Jett cover of Blitzkrieg Bop.

Non-stick dishes and tableware.

posted by Ardiril 29 April | 13:58

Baby kennels.
Home liposuction kits.

posted by jrossi4r 29 April | 14:22

Joan Jett - Judy is a Punk. As close as I can get.

posted by Ardiril 29 April | 14:41

Baby kennels.

when I was a kid, that was called "Mrs Adcock's house". YMMV.

me, I need a time machine, and possibly a teleporter kthxbai.

posted by lonefrontranger 29 April | 14:42

A google for scents. So I can google, what the hells is that fucking smell?

posted by msali 29 April | 14:45

Those hypodermic dealies on Star Trek that let you get shots without being stuck by needles.

Perpetual motion machines.

Flubber.

posted by Atom Eyes 29 April | 14:59

mute button for my cat
mute button for the neighbor's dog

posted by desjardins 29 April | 15:13

"Orange" computers and other devices (as opposed to Apple)

Trader Joe's home delivery

a diet soft drink that doesn't make me THIRSTY

bus service that STOPS at my location halfway between San Luis and Pismo (instead of speeding by at 65 mph)

self-cleaning bathrooms

a comfortable desk chair under $150

at LEAST five American political parties

posted by oneswellfoop 29 April | 15:37

Bachelor Chow

posted by octothorpe 29 April | 15:39

A way to silence other people's alarm clocks that have been beeping for an hour and they are obviously not home.

A handy chart of what cables and plugs and adapters to keep and what I can get rid of.

posted by rmless2 29 April | 15:54

at LEAST five American political parties - Good one!

posted by Ardiril 29 April | 15:56

Those "highways" found in Asimov's Robot books.

posted by Melismata 29 April | 15:57

at LEAST five American political parties

MORE contention and ideology is just what we need!

posted by Miko 29 April | 16:16

High-speed, broadband internet that is not teh expensive satellite version, in my home town.

posted by Lynsey 29 April | 16:32

A straight through train from my station to my boy's station without a hub stop in the middle. That'd cut my trip down to about 25 minutes, as opposed to anywhere between 45 and 90 minutes.

posted by gc 29 April | 16:48

FLAT RATE DATA ROAMING (yes I gjust received my bill from hell-trip up from Italy - phone use in Switzerland and Germany cost me more than all of *last year*)

posted by dabitch 29 April | 16:51

Polka dotted and striped and otherwise patterned cars.

Working passenger rail service all over the US.

Parliamentary representation instead of the two party system and also abolition of the electoral college.

Socialized medicine now.

oh and anti gravity belts and jetpacks and pretty much everything else they had on the Jetsons.

posted by mygothlaundry 29 April | 17:19

Long-distance US Maglev. A method of searching mental health providers that accept my insurance other than the single massive, detail-lacking PDF they currently provide.

posted by notquitemaryann 29 April | 17:22

A kitchen device that will chill food or drink down as quickly as a microwave can heat something up. (Nope, fridge and freezer aren't fast enough, I mean like room temp to nicely chilled in ~1.5 minutes)

posted by jamaro 29 April | 18:24

A channel on TV that looks & sounds like a real fish tank. Saltwater. And NO commercials.

posted by chewatadistance 29 April | 18:30

Decoupling of health insurance from employers.

Instant sinkholes for people who throw cigarette butts out car windows.

posted by chewatadistance 29 April | 18:31

A cure for a disease. For all diseases.

posted by Kangaroo 29 April | 18:35

A way to email physical objects.

posted by Obscure Reference 29 April | 20:09

I always wanted a teleport portal- like a doorframe between two places, not a beam like Star Trek.

If you kept your side stationary, but let the other side move around, you'd have a window where you could travel the universe while sitting in your living room, only jumping through to check things out if you saw an intriguing mushroom on another planet, f'rinstance, or a sunken pile of gold on the sea floor.

posted by BoringPostcards 29 April | 20:42

Hangover-free booze.

A creature who lives off of cat shit, washes dishes for fun, and poops bars of purest platinum.

Caffeine- and nicotine-infused bacon.

posted by BitterOldPunk 29 April | 23:15

A way to email physical objects.

Especially food.

posted by deborah 29 April | 23:23

What BP said. That has been a fantasy of mine for a long time.

And yeah, hangover-free booze.

posted by Specklet 30 April | 04:18

google for smells?

surely we should call it: googolfactor!

posted by nthdegx 30 April | 05:15

breakfast delivery service

posted by desjardins 30 April | 13:01

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