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23 October 2008

What a day. From the ridiculously sublime to the sublimely ridiculous. or something.[More:] So, I'm standing by my workstation and this thin guy in a trenchcoat walks past me. I look up and it's JOHN FUCKING WATERS! He was in too much of a hurry to talk, but he gave me a look that said 'yeah. I am who you think I am.' We all gawked a bit from a distance when he was at the register.'

Then later, some guy came in with a trunkful of books. Smelling a tip, I offered to unload them. I get to his trunk and they're not boxed but loose which made it even more work. I finally get him inside and he says "Thank you. I'm going to give you my card. Call the number on it in one year." I was wondering if this dude was involved in some kind of crazy-ass Pay It Forward deal. Long story short, we reject most of his books, he made about $60, and I cart his stuff back to his car. He stops and says "Let me explain the card. I lived here in this neighborhood for 4 years until a woman broke my heart. tehn I found this company and they saved my life. It's multilevel marketing for electricity. You get paid every time your customers pay their utilty bill. It'll be in New York in a year."

I wanted to say "Take your Enron Ponzi scheme and shove it, Slick. Gimme five dollars for busting my ass.' Instead I just nodded.

Jeez. I worked commissioned sales for 4 years. My dad was a salesman. Neither of us went around handing out cards and giving slick speeches to starngers. there's a difference between honest salesmanship and simply being a snake-oil dealer. Sheesh.
I should mention that Waters is really skinny. I'm a wiry dude myself and two of him could hide behind me with room to stretch out.
posted by jonmc 23 October | 21:21
God, that sounds like the first chapter of a Paul Auster novel.
posted by Miko 23 October | 21:45
Miko: this is the second time someone's tried to recruit me for some MLM scheme. Way back in my chain booktore days, some guy tried to get me to hop on the Amway train. A born-again buddy of mine invited me to his church on 'friends day,' too.* Why am I never recruited for anything cool?

*I approached this the same way I approach being flirted with by a gay guy: be flatterd but say no and move on. Among evangelicals, saving your soul is just their way of saying hello.
posted by jonmc 23 October | 21:51
John Waters. Too cool. I was living in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada and Cecil B. DeMented was having a preview showing, so I had to go. Waters was there, promo'ing his film. Talked about the deplorable state of movie making and the lack of any real edge, thus the making of the film. He took some questions, and at the end said, "No matter what you may think of this film, remember; I'm up here promoting my film and talking to you. You'll never see George Lucas do this." Standing ovation, and the film ran and it was wonderful. I loves me some twisted filmmaking. Nowadays what've we got? "Saw" Part Five? Puh-leez.
The Man was ultra-skinny then, too. I think it may be time for a John Waters Film Fest at my pad. weee!
posted by Zack_Replica 23 October | 21:58
err. link - Cecil B. DeMented.
Also, what ever happened to this?? Probably never got made due to questionable material.
posted by Zack_Replica 23 October | 22:02
Talked about the deplorable state of movie making and the lack of any real edge,

Thing about Waters is, for all his edginess (and he's edgier than U2's guitarist after three days on a whetstone), he's got a heart, too. The scene is his version of Hairspray where the two girls are dancing to 'Shake A Tailfeather' always gets me verklepmt. And he's no snob either. He did a great TV cameo on Homicide: Life On The Street, maybe as a favor to fellow Baltimoron filmamker Barry Levinson.
posted by jonmc 23 October | 22:04
Waters film fest this weekend!
posted by arse_hat 23 October | 22:52
I kept my Odorama scratchcard from 'Polyester' for years until it got lost in a house move.
posted by essexjan 24 October | 03:10
kept my Odorama scratchcard from 'Polyester' for years

Ooh, I had one of those. I wonder which pile of memorabilia it's stuck in?
posted by DarkForest 24 October | 09:05
jon, it's time to start thinking like a recruiter not a recruitee.
posted by StickyCarpet 24 October | 11:49
God, that sounds like the first chapter of a Paul Auster novel.

totally. jon goes home, is about to throw the card in the trash, but he glances at it and realizes that the guy's name is the same as jon's father. jon picks up the phone calls the number and
posted by matteo 24 October | 13:08
"Take your Enron Ponzi scheme and shove it

N. Ron Ponzi, MBA
posted by matteo 24 October | 13:14
totally. jon goes home, is about to throw the card in the trash, but he glances at it and realizes that the guy's name is the same as jon's father. jon picks up the phone calls the number and

That kills me. What is the big deal ith him anyway?
posted by ethylene 24 October | 13:38
Fashion advice, please! || I now officially hate these people.

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