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18 September 2008

My fiance is at his bachelor party. In Vegas. I trust him, but ugh, I hate sitting at home, hundreds of miles away, knowing he's at a strip club.
You could call him every 15 mins. Does he have a cell? Seriously though, I c an understand your worrie but he will be safe and he loves you.
posted by MonkeyButter 18 September | 21:06
Look at this way- either he's having a wonderful time, and he's so greatful that he's with a woman who would trust him enough to let him do so, or he's having a terrible time, thinking, man, am I ever glad to be marrying a wonderful woman like desjardins.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 18 September | 21:31
I have a funny Las Vegas bachelor party story to cheer you up. Friend had his, his bride-to-be sent her brother to keep an eye on things. Brother disappears for two hours at the strip club. Comes back, says "I thought the stripper really liked me." He ended up having to put $1400 on his dad's credit card.
posted by Twiggy 18 September | 21:37
It's all good. I got some smokin' lingerie for the wedding night that is guaranteed to beat whatever the strippers have.
posted by desjardins 18 September | 21:54
How long is he gone?
Long enough so we can get together an friendly orgy um, get together?

Quick, everyone, party in Illinois!
posted by ethylene 18 September | 21:58
I hear ya.

When my husband was out at his bachelor party, his dad was calling me about once an hour with problems about car rentals, hotel reservations, and what time they'd see my guy the next day. "I DON'T FUCKING KNOW EXACTLY WHERE HE IS BUT I'VE GOT A PRETTY GOOD IDEA. STOP CALLING ME AND CALL THIS NUMBER I'VE ALREADY GIVEN YOU THREE OTHER TIMES!" was not an ok way to answer, so I kept it all very polite through clenched teeth. It went on through the next morning and day until my guy finally returned at 3pm.

I got to hear all the bachelor party stories, and I have to tell you, the only thing I was jealous about was that his buddies poured a lot of Patron down him. Yeah, at the strip club. I don't care about the boobs, but I LOVE tequila.
posted by lilywing13 18 September | 22:13
You could call him every 15 mins.

Jesus God, don't do this.
posted by middleclasstool 18 September | 22:14
When he called tonight, he said his cell battery was near death so he asked me to call him back at the hotel. Since he's no longer at the hotel, I can't call him anyway. But no, I wouldn't do that. If he called me every 15 minutes I'd turn my cell off too.
posted by desjardins 18 September | 22:47
Unless it was set to vibrate. ;)

That was the advantage of having the wedding in Vegas, too... I got to go to the bachelor party.
posted by Pips 18 September | 23:23
I think you should spend this time planning your own party. My idea for the perfect bachelorette party is: a hunky guy comes to your house, gives you foot rubs, and brings you ice cream, then fixes the washing machine.
posted by taz 18 September | 23:44
The thing that bothers me about men going in groups to strip clubs is that it seems like they're so much fun and I know, deep down, that a group of women at a strip club aren't having that much fun. I have been to a strip show with a group of girls, and the only hilarity in it for us was how disgusting the whole thing was. In short, I'm jealous- I want to have mischevious fun like that with my girlfriends, but it seems as though men will always have us beat in that area.

On preview: see, taz, that's what I'm talking about- having some strange man touch me doesn't sound like fun to me at all, particularly not if all of my close friends are there watching and being touched by him, too.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 18 September | 23:48
Coed sleepover slumber dance party.
It's all about fun fun fun and hallucenigenics.
Music, lights, costumes
Bring your own ornaments.
posted by ethylene 18 September | 23:55
taz - that's called Sunday around here. Why do you think I'm marrying him?

Apparently my bachelorette party is this coming Saturday. I've been to strip clubs before and yeah, not that exciting. More like really, really cheesy. I'd rather go see a drag show or dance at a club, but with the distances involved it'd be impractical. So, I'm just going to go and get drunk and embarrass myself, but I'm pretty sure it's not going to be the same kind of thrill that Mr Desjardins gets out of it. I know he won't be sitting at home worrying about me.
posted by desjardins 19 September | 00:00
Hey Desjardins, when I got married, my fiance disappeared for 72 hours. I was really pissed and worried, couldn't get ahold of him at all.

When he showed up he reeked. I tried to call the wedding off.

UNTIL I SAW THE MONKEY STRIPPER VIDEO.

His friends had kidnapped him, gotten him roaring drunk, stripped his clothes off, duct-taped him naked to a lawn chair, pelted him with bananas, and then unleashed a stripping monkey on him. There was a full 24 hours of cleanup after that at the house where it happened... after everybody recovered from hangovers.

I forgave him. It was the funniest thing I had ever seen. I dubbed copies, and gave them to friends. God dammit I wish I still had it.

So, maybe it's NOT what you are thinking about at all happening. I was afraid my soon-to-be-husband was fucking a stripper.

He was frantically screaming and scootching away from a chimp wearing a bikini butt naked, okay?

I hope somehow this makes you feel better.

PS> anyone in Dallas need the number of Miki the Monkey Stripper, I still have it. cheers.
posted by Unicorn on the cob 19 September | 00:11
that a group of women at a strip club aren't having that much fun

you should hang out in the ladies room! A few years ago, I spent a hilariously fun night drinking whiskey in the womens' bathroom at a strip club and talking to all the working girls doing their hair and makeup while my male friends were outside being spectators. We all had a great time talking shit about the guys and everything else. It was all those guys paying to see OMG boobs that seemed kinda sad and not so fun to me.

but this bachelor party thing(like most things) is all about the company-I am sure your man is enjoying hanging out with his best friends way more than just seeing some lovely stripper titties. (well except maybe for the pole work-holy hell the things some of those ladies can do on a pole are mind blowing.) don't sweat it-he's marrying you!
posted by slackshot 19 September | 00:27
No, I agree, TPS.
posted by taz 19 September | 00:30
He called me when he got back to the hotel, which was sweet. I could tell he wasn't even that drunk. Anyway, I'm off to bed. He's home tomorrow.
posted by desjardins 19 September | 01:19
It's good to know if he's the type to have public sex with a stranger beforehand, i say.
posted by ethylene 19 September | 02:59
I've gotten married twice and never had a bachelor party, I must be doing it wrong.
posted by octothorpe 19 September | 06:24
Octothorpe - you're at least doing it the same as me.
posted by plinth 19 September | 08:58
My wife and I did it the right way: we had a big-ass party at a restaurant with all our friends, then the women went one way, the men (and a couple of the women) went the other, and we finally all met up again at a bar at 1:00am to compare notes. Good times.
posted by eamondaly 19 September | 10:02
(((desjardins))) slackshot is right in that it's all about the company.

I wish we had had time to let MuddDude have a proper bachelor's party (it would have been him and his friends trying to beat Ocarina of Time in one night, or having a mushu pork eating contest).
posted by muddgirl 19 September | 10:11
what happens in vegas stays in vegas...
posted by quonsar 19 September | 10:32
I've got to start putting together my sister's bachlorette party- one of my younger sisters is getting married the saturday after Christmas. The timing of the wedding makes it sort of difficult- not sure exactly when everyone is coming into town. Luckily, my sister is very low key, so I'm sure whatever we do, even if we all just hang out at someone's house or hotel, will be fun.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 19 September | 11:31
As a man, let me say this: If I'm at a strip club and I have a girlfriend, then the strippers do not attract me as potential mates. I enjoy ogling them and getting lap dances, but it is a purely financial transaction.

Your fiancee is marrying you because he loves you. Those strippers are just eye candy and pose no threat to you. At the end of the day, he will come home to you.
posted by reenum 19 September | 15:21
The thing that bothers me about men going in groups to strip clubs is that it seems like they're so much fun and I know, deep down, that a group of women at a strip club aren't having that much fun. I have been to a strip show with a group of girls, and the only hilarity in it for us was how disgusting the whole thing was. In short, I'm jealous- I want to have mischevious fun like that with my girlfriends, but it seems as though men will always have us beat in that area.


I always figured that a group of guys at a strip club are just trying, consciously or not, to have a shared sexual experience with their male friends in a way that won't get them accused of teh gay.
posted by dersins 19 September | 16:43
TPS, I don't know your sister, obvs, but for my b-ette party we played Laser Tag. Very fun and funny, for a group of first time Laser Tager Women. Of course, if they play Laser Tag regularly, this will not work.

(The Husband went Bowling. Really.)

The only other b-ette party I think favorably on is one where somebody hosted a home party for sex toys. So the sex toy lady was there, and there were games and discussions and laughs and stuff, without it being all Strip Clubby Oogy.

posted by rainbaby 19 September | 20:26
I'm Looking For A Knitting Project. || Flu. Boo. :(

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