I asked a friend of mine out a while back. I got the polite "thanks but I'm not looking for a relationship" thing. We're actually better friends now, since I'm over it (I have, admittedly, a short attention span), and there's no underlying tension.

It did require me to swallow my pride and not hide out when he was around, though. And to his credit, he didn't act any differently after or ever mention it beyond that.

So, it can be done. But it very much depends on the people involved.

If the attraction is strong and not just fleeting, and is not mutual, it often, often changes the friendship forever. Consequences of this can be evaded if the parties can both work to overcome the weirdness.

You may not be able to help how you feel, but you can control the way you behave.

Sure, I've had that kind of thing work out okay. It's best if the attraction takes the form of a quick and fleeting crush, never developing into a serious romantic intention. If it gets to the point of having to be rejected, then yeah, I think the likelihood of long-term friendship begins to go down.

I have had this happen, where the feeling was mutual, but both parties were not in a position to pursue anything (or interested in doing so at the time). It made the friendship stronger, knowing that neither side would do anything to seek anything but friendship, while establishing a closer friendship with the shared understanding that there was an undercurrent of attraction in place. I think this is very, very rare, though.

Yes, and then I did something slightly dickish to seal the deal.

It made the friendship stronger, knowing that neither side would do anything to seek anything but friendship, while establishing a closer friendship with the shared understanding that there was an undercurrent of attraction in place

This one. Repeatedly. Not that rare, dg.

Fear is a friend I wish I'd never kissed.