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29 June 2008

Why do people put stupid requirements in Craigslist ads? You know, things like "no psychotic people" or "no timewasters?" Do they think that some psychotic person is going to see it and think to himself, "Hmmmm, ordinarily I would intentionally waste this person's time, but it says no timewasters so I guess I won't?"[More:]Pearls of wisdom from my apartment search.
heh. We should start a list.

- Must like to laugh.
- Must have a sense of humor. (This one makes me run for the hills because it implies their sense of humor hasn't gone over well in the past.)
- My family is important to me.
- Must be attractive (um? This one is especially good when the poster is a complete slob.)
posted by small_ruminant 29 June | 15:48
Damn. . .that s_r is one particular chick. I don't meet any of those requirements!
posted by danf 29 June | 16:03
Must be attractive (um? This one is especially good when the poster is a complete slob.)


I remember the guy who had "Must be extremely attractive" in his preferences for a date in eharmony (which I was on briefly, long story). I looked the guy up -- balding, paunchy, and wall-eyed.
posted by lleachie 29 June | 16:28
If balding, paunchy, timewasting psychotics can't find loving apartments, what hope is there for the rest of us?
posted by box 29 June | 16:47
s_r, I clicked on that hoping --- oh, hoping! --- that it would be the one I remembered. You did not disappoint.

"IT MUST SIZZLE!"
posted by Elsa 29 June | 17:52
How about all the ones with offensive generalizations?

- Are there any normal girls out there?
- Are all women psychotic gold-diggers?
- If you have issues, don't respond
posted by small_ruminant 29 June | 17:53
Elsa- when I read it I dmitri-the-lover's obnoxious voice. It totally adds to it.
posted by small_ruminant 29 June | 17:55
... I *hear" dmitri...

Proofreading is for wusses!
posted by small_ruminant 29 June | 17:55
- you must be smart. Edicated only! (or some variation)
posted by small_ruminant 29 June | 17:57
hee. Ok. I will stop now, but what about people looking to become one "sole" or looking for their sole mate.

I usually don't mind people who can't spell, but some misspellings are too funny to ignore.
posted by small_ruminant 29 June | 17:59
I have a friend at work actually paid $4000.00 for one of those dating memberships, then outlined the following:

1. Must be no less than 45 years old and no more than 55. (This coming from a woman who just a few years ago had a three year relationship with a 72 year old man).

2. Must have hair.

3. No tattoos.

4. No pets.

5. Prefer a home owner or someone who has rented the same apartment consistently for a number of years.

6. Physically active.

7. Attractive.

All this from a woman who could use a lot of updating in her wardrobe and personal style. Gee, surprisingly, she's met no one who qualifies. Who is attracted to her, at least.
posted by redvixen 29 June | 19:12
I haven't read personals since before Craig's list existed in my city but I remember loving the ads that said "Must be employed and no jail birds please".
posted by octothorpe 29 June | 22:04
best roommate ad ever

ONE HUNDRED PERCENT AGREE.
posted by mudpuppie 30 June | 00:21
-no superfluous limbs, please.
posted by jonmc 30 June | 01:29
Yeah, that's quite specific, redvixen. On the other hand, several of those are objective criteria. It's quite easy to tell whether you have a tattoo or not, but does anyone who regards themselves as a "timewaster" stop wasting your time because you put "no timewasters?"
posted by grouse 30 June | 01:57
Also, the people offering $1 or $100 rent to "young females only" for "cooking and cleaning" or "with exchange?" Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Creepy!
posted by grouse 30 June | 02:04
For rental and house sales ads, I think the "timewasters" thing refers to people who just like to look at places, and aren't actually in the market to buy or rent. Though the point remains, how likely are they to be dissuaded by that throwaway line?
posted by taz 30 June | 02:57
Well, redvixen, I think a lot of men could pretty much meet that criteria. I could do 6/7:
1. I'm 45.
2. I have (some) hair. Quite a bit of it is even on my head. Back hair counts, right?
3. No tattoos. Yet.
4. No pets. Left living.
5. I'm a home owner. Does she mind sharing?
6. Physically active. Running away from your friend.
7. Sorry, I got all the way to the end and couldn't make the cut :-(
posted by dg 30 June | 03:54
Yes, taz, exactly.

Here's a different kind of exchange, for handyman skills.
posted by grouse 30 June | 06:57
best roommate ad ever

Wow. Except for the straight male bit, that sounds a lot like my husband's former roomate.
posted by lysdexic 30 June | 11:09
What I don't get is, why people post these requirements when they mean different things to different people.

- Must have a sense of humor. But only a sense of humor that I like/is compatible with mine.
- Must like to laugh. But not at things that I think are stupid and shouldn't be laughed at.
- My family is important to me. Therefore, you must get along with them exactly the way I want you to.
- Must be attractive That is, meet my definition of attraction.

posted by Melismata 30 June | 12:10
Seeking a live-in "houseboy?" Uh. Wow.
posted by grouse 30 June | 19:01
Designers, how much should I be charging for a website design? || ESPANA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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