MetaChat - What modern convenience should never have been invented?

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18 February 2008

What modern convenience should never have been invented?

post by: ThePinkSuperhero at: 19:27 | 48 comments

wallpaper.

posted by chewatadistance 18 February | 19:28

Pants.

posted by jonmc 18 February | 19:29

plastic bottles.

plastic most things.

posted by small_ruminant 18 February | 19:31

I'll go with jonmc's, too, but for men only. They should all be wearing well-cut kilts.

posted by small_ruminant 18 February | 19:32

Cell phone.

posted by bmarkey 18 February | 19:32

plastic grocery bags (to riff on s_r)

elastic.

heelies.

posted by lonefrontranger 18 February | 19:37

MMMM....Kilts.

posted by lleachie 18 February | 19:37

men only. They should all be wearing well-cut kilts.

No. I don't need tartan rubbing against my forbidden valley.

Also, vitamin water and powerbars. That shit's about two steps from Pleasure Pellets. Eat some actual food, people!

posted by jonmc 18 February | 19:40

Seconding "cell phones."

posted by BoringPostcards 18 February | 19:43

those retardo triangle-pointed narrow-ass shoes that corporadas wear with the star trek pants in YourCorp, USA.

posted by Lipstick Thespian 18 February | 19:46

Eat some actual food, people!

Okay, seriously, that's a funny thing for you to say jon!

Now, on topic, I'm gonna say corn syrup solids, and the rest of the crap that they make all that nonfood with that is slowly starving north americans to death while making them fat.

/hopes that doesn't sound pious.

posted by richat 18 February | 20:01

Rush hour.

posted by redvixen 18 February | 20:04

I just hate the licensing plans attached to cell phones. So, I would say that "leasing" anything is lame, as is buying anything but a house on credit.

I agree with corn syrup in everything being pure evil, and whatever is giving everyone autism.

posted by craniac 18 February | 20:19

Packaging

posted by drezdn 18 February | 20:22

Children.

Okay, they're an inconvenience, of course, for the parents, but so much more so to those of us that choose to remain childless.

posted by ufez 18 February | 20:25

most unforgettable phrase of the day: " don't need tartan rubbing against my forbidden valley."

anyway, i think that perhaps the assembly line contraptions you see on "the secret life of ..." are evil. first of all, they've eliminated the need for many jobs. second of all, they allow candies to be mass-produced, as well as other things like shoes, and thus have decreased the quality of goods.

assembly lines that are staffed by people through every step of the procedure are a whole other deal. those are still okay. i don't know why. but they are.

posted by brina 18 February | 20:26

The Walkman and all follow-on personal listening devices.

posted by Doohickie 18 February | 20:32

I admit nothing occurred to me, but I'll go with High Fructose Corn Syrup, followed by wallpaper.

posted by rainbaby 18 February | 20:50

Vaccinations.

If you can't survive polio, FUCK YOU!

posted by kyleg 18 February | 20:52

*pastes paper to wall with high fructose corn syrup*

I'm an iconoclast, yo.

posted by jonmc 18 February | 20:52

But are you a modern convenience?

posted by rainbaby 18 February | 20:59

I'm a postmodern inconvienience.

posted by jonmc 18 February | 21:04

"I don't need tartan rubbing against my forbidden valley"

The forbidden valley is not eroded by kilt material, which is a surprisingly comfy woven worsted wool, though I imagine kilts aren't much fun to wear in high summer.

posted by matthewr 18 February | 21:28

Snooze buttons.

posted by WolfDaddy 18 February | 21:49

Plug-in air fresheners. Who buys this crap? Apologies in advance if you buy this crap. :)

Also, disposable Swiffers, toilet cleaner starter kits, Pledge wipes, and other wasteful cleaning things.

posted by LoriFLA 18 February | 22:18

Lunchables.

posted by Miko 18 February | 22:22

Yes! Lunchables! And Uncrustables!

posted by LoriFLA 18 February | 22:30

I'd add lunchables to the list, too, but Pips likes them.

posted by jonmc 18 February | 22:34

Call waiting.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 18 February | 22:36

Television

posted by hadjiboy 18 February | 22:41

In car DVD players. I've almost crashed because I'm watching Sponge Bob through the back window of the car in front of me.

posted by octothorpe 18 February | 22:46

Guns.

posted by box 18 February | 22:50

Those idiot stickers on CD jewelcases.

posted by bmarkey 18 February | 22:53

Suburban McMansions
Personalized ringtones
Gas guzzlers
Nthing the plastic-hate

posted by SassHat 18 February | 23:12

The automobile.

posted by arse_hat 18 February | 23:15

Kilts just need to be lined with silk - see who complains about forbidden valleys chafing then ;)

posted by casarkos 18 February | 23:28

casrakos, I wore silk boxers once, it felt really weird. I'll stick with cotton.

posted by jonmc 18 February | 23:42

That gene that made humans self-aware. Someone in the cosmic labs sure is having fun watching this experiment run itself.

posted by not_on_display 19 February | 00:03

Computerized A/C-heaters in cars.

posted by brujita 19 February | 01:43

Postmodernism.

posted by Daniel Charms 19 February | 02:37

Americans.

posted by seanyboy 19 February | 03:05

CD's for MUSIC.

posted by dabitch 19 February | 03:16

Plastic for non-medical purposes and drive-thrus.

I have a plugin smelly thing in my bathroom because those gelly ones really creep me out, and I think a kilt in summer would be nice if it were made of a light wool or wool-silk blend. I wear a lot of skirts in the summer because pants and shorts are just to darn hot. Skirts are much, much cooler and the airflow through the "valley o'pleasure" is quite refreshing.

posted by LunaticFringe 19 February | 08:35

Spray on hair.

posted by arse_hat 19 February | 10:30

Electric beer pumps

posted by asok 19 February | 10:31

Snooze buttons.

God, no. I thoroughly disagree with this comment.

I really like turning my phone off.

posted by goo 20 February | 08:00

Cellphones. I hate having a digital leash. I recently got rid of my phone, and it has been a very freeing experience.

posted by reenum 06 March | 20:09

Leaf blowers. Use a fucking broom, you lazy prick!

posted by dg 07 March | 00:17

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