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07 June 2007

This post is for FACTUAL information only [More:]

FACT: The blue whale is the only mammal that has never owned a copy of Abbey Road

FACT: In the town of Barstow, New Jersey, it is illegal to spend money on a Wednesday

FACT: The Pacific Ocean is the only man made structure that can be seen from space.
FACT: Due to the jet stream, it takes more gas to drive from New York to San Francisco than from San Francisco to New York.
posted by Joe Invisible 07 June | 10:41
FACT: If you laid all the pirate hats from Lego 6261 end to end you could reach the moon and circle it 3 times and make it almost all the way back to earth again before running out of hats.

FACT: As I learned when I visited Maine last weekend, there are no US State names that only contain one syllable.

FACT: The Erie Canal became so polluted that all of the water was pumped out of it and it is now filled with Cranberry Jello.
posted by iconomy 07 June | 10:42
FACT: watching every episode of Heroes within four days will leave you feeling paranoid and give you mutant powers.
posted by craniac 07 June | 10:45
FACT: Wireless technology isn't really wireless: the wires are just too small to see or feel.
posted by treepour 07 June | 10:53
As I learned when I visited Maine last weekend, there are no US State names that only contain one syllable.

::says Maine over and over in head, doesn't hear more than one syllable::

Ok, I'll bite....
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 07 June | 10:57
Earthquakes happen more often in rainy weather, because the drizzle lubricates the earth's tectonic plates.
posted by occhiblu 07 June | 11:12
People who live in the U.S., Italy, and Thailand are 94% more likely to invent statistics than all the inhabitants of any other country combined.
posted by occhiblu 07 June | 11:13
As usual, occhiblu is just plain wrong. The number is 96%. Jeesh.
posted by omiewise 07 June | 11:18
Studies proved that internet users who choose three-syllable usernames that start with "O" are often contrary.
posted by occhiblu 07 June | 11:20
Leopards are the only striped quadruped to hunt in packs. During the hunt, they protect their young by hiding them among groups of grazing zebras.
posted by occhiblu 07 June | 11:21
Ok, I'll bite....
Well the joke here is that the facts are incorrect... ;P

FACT: In 1990, Bob Barker, star of The Price is Right, had one of his nipples bitten off by a very angry male Golden Retriever during the filming of one of his "Get Your Dog Neutered or Spayed" segments.
posted by iconomy 07 June | 11:26
The Queen of England is composed of 93% gin.

Being born is the second worst thing that can happen to you, the first worst thing is to have your sock roll down your ankle and lodge itself under your heel while you are walking.

My dog has never shat on the floor in our house in a fit of pique.

Chickens love Kung-Fu movies, regardless of quality.

Ants do not exist.

Water is a lethal beverage, I offer this as proof: Fish shit in it, people bathe in it.

George Washington had a wooden head.
posted by Divine_Wino 07 June | 11:54
FACT: Carrots cause eye damage, as 99.85 percent of American drivers who were in fatal accidents in the last 20 years ate carrots at some point in their lives.
posted by brina 07 June | 12:04
Bees and dogs are not the only animals who can smell fear; there have been a number of well-documented cases of the Nambian Greater Sloth being able to detect fear in humans, and sometimes even sarcasm.
posted by Specklet 07 June | 12:07
I invented the word "nozzle."
posted by mudpuppie 07 June | 12:23
FACT: All rivers are fed by the same underground source.
posted by treepour 07 June | 12:44
Fact: Those little packets in vitamin bottles. The actually absorb LOTS of vitamins, and when the bottle is finished, these packets can usually be dissolved in a glass of apple juice (in two doses) and taken, with equal therapeutic value as the vitamins themselves.

The "do not consume" printing on the packets is just greed on the part of the vitamin companies, so you buy a new bottle sooner.
posted by danf 07 June | 12:46
I inspired the invention of the word "nozzle."
posted by occhiblu 07 June | 12:47
It's a fact. Occhiblu inspired the invention of the word "nozzle" during an especially competitive bout of Twister, which shall heretofore never be discussed again.
posted by mudpuppie 07 June | 12:54
Before Occhiblu inspired Mudpuppie to invent the word nozzle the world had to make due with my own pathetic contribution to the taxonomy:

adeviceforregulatingtheflowofliquidisthisthing.
posted by Divine_Wino 07 June | 12:55
FACT: If human blood was green, it wouldn't be some crazy neon green color, but much darker, like a forest green with an almost black undercoat, ranging to a ferny color in the big arteries.

FACT: My skin keeps me in, and the germs out.

FACT: Sometimes the most stubborn nostril hairs are also the most caring.
posted by Hugh Janus 07 June | 13:13
FACT: Some prostitutes have a heart of gold, literally.
posted by Capn 07 June | 13:17
FACT: People in the US whose primary vehicle is an SUV are twice as likely to suffer from halitosis and four times as likely to develop urinary tract infections as those who drive Priuses.

Oddly, these figures are exactly reversed in Canada.
posted by deadcowdan 07 June | 13:30
Fact: jonmc's and pips' porch is the only human-made structure on Earth that can be seen from the moon.
posted by danf 07 June | 13:56
Fact: jonmc's and pips' porch...

*needs beer badly; reads comment; light goes on in head; picks up phone*
posted by Hugh Janus 07 June | 14:17
Fact: 46 percent of Americans doubt the existence of nozzles.
Fact: 98 percent of self-identified agnozzlestics believe in "the thingie." The remainder believe in adeviceforregulatingtheflowofliquidisthisthing.
posted by jrossi4r 07 June | 14:27
Fact: Craniac's statement is true in all parts.

(Did that. Got twitchy. S'a superpower, right?)
posted by Fuzzbean 07 June | 14:38
TIT-EEZ™ is #1 selling haircare product manufactured South of the Mason-Dixon line.
posted by danostuporstar 07 June | 15:03
Fact: science is really witchcraft but the scientists renamed it so they'd stop getting burned at the stake.

Fact: I am an agnozzlestic.
posted by LunaticFringe 07 June | 15:10
98 percent of self-identified agnozzlestics believe in "the thingie."

I believe in the thingie. Mmmm. The thingie.
posted by treepour 07 June | 15:21
Fact: The pyramids were constructed by meerkats.
posted by chewatadistance 07 June | 15:44
FACT: When a ghost dies, a synthesizer is born.

FACT: Corporate stress balls are made from elderly pain.

FACT: On the planet Foirnoxb, the year is actually 7002.

FACT: Foirnoxbians speak Foirnoxbinian, yet have no language to speak of.

FACT: The word "nomanil" is defined as "a word that has no meaning".
posted by Hellbient 07 June | 15:54
FACT: When a ghost dies, a synthesizer is born.


*dons sheet, jumps out at hellbient from a corner, howling "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOG!"*
posted by Elsa 07 June | 16:27
FACT: Corporate stress balls are made from elderly pain.

Is that the pain of elders, or pain that is on its last legs?
posted by occhiblu 07 June | 16:28
FACT: Maine law compels residents to follow any vocalization of the name "Maine" with the affirmative "ayuh."

posted by Elsa 07 June | 16:30
FACT: dogs can't look up.
posted by Elsa 07 June | 16:31
FACT: This is not a self-link.
posted by wendell 07 June | 18:00
FACT: Tinsel is harvested from the coat of the gatobrillante, a small South American arboreal mammal.

FACT: Contrary to popular belief, ham is actually mined. The confusion results from the use of swine to seek out the location of a new vein of ham, much as they are used to hunt truffles.

FACT: In some cultures, a pool of water is referred to as the "anti-nozzle".
posted by bmarkey 07 June | 18:13
I am SO putting this on a tshirt:

Sometimes the most stubborn nostril hairs are also the most caring.
posted by chewatadistance 07 June | 21:33
Fact: jason's_planet is the Platonic Ideal of suavitude.

Fact: During leap years, watermelons become poisonous on February 15th

Fact: William Faulkner never died. He faked his own death and started a new life as a bootlegger in the Brazilian Amazon. There are rumors of a set of new manuscripts hidden away somewhere in a decaying opera house in Manaus.

Fact: My sneakers have magical powers

Fact: It is impossible to translate the phrase "Sensitive New Age Guy" into the Inuit languages. Fucking impossible, I tell you.

Fact: The CIA has placed a secret ingredient in the chicken at my local Chinese-Peruvian place. I would elaborate on the effects this ingredient has on me BUT this is a family website.

posted by jason's_planet 07 June | 23:34
Fack: Woman have a second set of eyelids that protect them from spontaneous bukkake facials.
posted by Citizen Premier 08 June | 01:08
Israel lobby update || THIS IS A SHOUTING THREAD

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