I think it's kind of like bubble gum - vital in your teens, a guilty pleasure by your early 30's, sort of banal by your 50's, completely pointless once you've outlived your permanent teeth.

I think people should be relaxed about it: masturbation is a great way to learn about your body, and even work through some of your sexual issues (premature ejaculation for instance, to pick a personal example).

On the other hand, I don't want public masturbation to be the norm when I'm 80, mostly for aesthetic reasons. And without the taboo that's probably the way the social mores would change in the next 50 years.

I am looking forward to routinely topless teenagers around the same time, though, so maybe I'm a hypocrite.

Anything that concerns those parts of us that we are suppose to keep covered up is going to have some taboo surrounding them. Hell, sex, shitting and pissing are all natural, but most of us won't be discussing the fine details with our moms anytime soon. And I bet you and I wouldn't be talking about it without the anonymity of cyberspace to insulate the issue.
But, just because it is a bit transgressive is no reason to get all squicky about discussing it, especially if you engage in it frequently.

more masturbation, less procrastination.

Masturbation: Your thoughts? →[More:] Pretty self explanatory.

Actually I figured you meant "what do you think about when?" I got physically excited about that prospect, in fact. (The answer is Legolas, by the way.)

If growing up about it means I can't make juvenile jokes then you can slap me and call me Geoffrey.

It's a completely natural part of life, and it makes me sad to think that people think it's something they should feel guilty about, or something that's gross/weird.

It's a good way to spend quality time with yourself, and, as Lentro pointed out, a great way to learn about your body.

It's the only sex I get these days, so I make the most of it.

I think that people who masturbate make better sex partners.

Totally for it. I haven't reached my 50s, or even my 40s, but I can't imagine that it won't continue to be a vital and much loved part of my life. It's the best kind of quality time with yourself.

However, I've met many people (mostly women) who aren't at all comfortable with it. They don't do it at all, or very intermittently with a big dose of guilt. It's always kind of a surprise to me, but the range of human experience is vast and fascinating.

I like it and will continue to do until my hands are too arthritic to work, then I'll probably buy a toy or two. That said I don't really discuss it with anyone and don't really enjoy hearing about other people's experiences. I don't really think it's taboo I just have an overactive imagination and picturing my friends doing that kinda squicks me out.

*remembers that her discount coupon for babeland expires in a few weeks*

I think that people who masturbate make better sex partners.

Agreed.

I agree that it's a completely natural part of life -- but some natural things are gross. Poop, for example. But masturbation isn't gross. It's not only a good tension reliever, but it can be a means of exploring not just one's body but also one's psyche (via fantasies). I dare say it can even be deeply spiritual, given the right mindset. And watching it can be pretty hot, too (depending on who's doing it and how they're doing it, of course) -- maybe your friend should spend some quality time on xtube . . . ?

What LF said. Unless it's of the guitar variety, in which case you should scourge yourself raw and promise never to do it again.

I am honored if someone feels comfortable enough with me to bring up the topic of masturbation in conversation. The same goes for many of your lesser-discussed bodily functions. Last week a friend confided in me that she has developed anal fissures, and I got a little choked up.

Ceiling cat is watching you discussing about masturbation.

Maybe it's because she is your ex-girlfriend and didn't want to go there.

(Pro. Both in private and with partner.)

Thanks metachat. I already want to kiss a girl, now this discussion. Gah.

When I first started, I felt profoundly guilty about it. It wasn't until my friends and I once had an open discussion about it that I accepted it was OK to do (this was probably sophomore year in high school) and now you know the rest of the story.

amro: I never thought of it that way. I guess that takes some of the squick out.

This reminds me of an exchange I had with my five year old over the weekend.

Me: Honey, please get the pteradactyl out of your crotch.
Her: Mom! I'm not putting it in my ba-jine-ya! I'm using the beak to scratch my leg.

I think that people who masturbate make better sex partners.

Meaning there are people who don't? !!!

Also, from my desk at work, where I'm writing this, I'm looking out across the street at the windows of the hotel room where I had the first masturbation expierence I can remember.
LO Freakin' L!

LMFAO @ jrossi!!!

Maybe, rainbaby. But trust me, masturbation is hardly a blip on the radar compared to some of the discussions we've had in the past week. If we can discuss her sex life and how she feels about it, I can make a passing reference to masturbation by saying "if my stupid roommate would leave for 20 minutes, that would be fabulous," don't you think? And kissing girls is fun, rainbaby. You should try it sometime. :P

I bet you and I wouldn't be talking about it without the anonymity of cyberspace to insulate the issue.
If we were at a meetup and for whatever reason, the topic of masturbation came up, I would have no problem telling you "I think it's perfectly normal, completely natural, and damn fun." If the conversation went further, I would have no problem listing URLs or website names of my favorites. However, that's about all I'd talk about. Not much to discuss about "technique" for guys, as far as I'm concerned. ;)

On that note, I deem this a very good discussion. :)

On preview: Two large LOL's @ jrossi4r and pieisexactlythree!

sort of banal by your 50's

I realize you are speaking for yourself, but still.

And there is something to be said that the therapeutic effects on the prostate, along with the significant fun element.

All the masturbation I can ever do doesn't really compare to kissing a girl, I think -- even if all she's really interested in pursuing, at that point, is kissing per se. Robert Heinlein nailed it for me when he wrote "Masturbation is cheap, clean, convenient, and free of any possibility of wrong-doing--and you don’t have to go home in the cold. But it’s lonely."

The loneliness is what's so great about it. Nobody is please but yourself.

If we can discuss her sex life and how she feels about it, I can make a passing reference to masturbation by saying "if my stupid roommate would leave for 20 minutes, that would be fabulous," don't you think?

it depends on how mature she is about that kind of thing. personally the 20-year-old I was would have probably provoked the same discussion, feeling myself to be wise and worldly but in reality just being pretty selfish (it was all about me, me, me back then!). then, rather than being open about a two-sided discussion, my being forced to think about an x boyfriend being a sexual being outside my realm of influence (even if it was only masturbation) would have made me a little uncomfortable and jealous, and i'd have thrown off the 'ewww' response probably as a misdirection in order to deflect attention from my discomfort about my internal, emotional response. because at that point it's somehow about control, and the fact that i no longer 'controlled' my x boyfriend's sexual life... well i have no good way of expressing how that would have bugged me at that age and point in my (im)maturity, but maybe you see what i'm getting at?

i hope for your sake your friends are a little more grownup and less selfabsorbed than i was. i'm just saying.

i'm so glad i'm no longer that person. and also, sad that it took me to nearly forty to figure out what box said.

But it’s lonely."

I have a different take. With a family, I sometimes grouse to myself that I can't find the time to partake. No complaints at all about my marital relations, but the other seems equally necessary and desirable, and it's something best done alone, unknown to anyone else.

If you could favorite comments, I would have favorited jrossi4r's comment about a million times...

::blink::
Wow. Well put, lfr. I hadn't thought of it like that. Perhaps you're on to something.

"it's something best done alone, unknown to anyone else."
Agreed, danf. My other roommate had at one point said "Dude if you ever want us to like leave the room for a few minutes..." and I cut him off, telling him that was both creepy and weird. I don't want people knowing when that's going on, let alone going out of their way to accomodate it. It's not really something that should be scheduled, I think.

I think the secrecy is what makes it even more fun.

Perhaps you're on to something.

i want to also clearly state for the record that i (personally) rarely provoked the discussions in order to be mean, or in-your-face to an x about 'see i'm getting some now'... tho i know that it certainly wasn't above me to be manipulative like that.

i don't think you should automatically assume this is what your x is doing. rather, i'm simply giving you the perspective that i as an older (and hopefully wiser) cubicle monkey seem to have gained.

some girls (and guys) i have known would absolutely provoke this type of discussion as an in-your-face slap on 'gee look how great my life is going now'. others, not so much. some people retain emotional attachments for ex partners long after the relationship is over (i know i still do for some) that makes it jarring to think of them as sexual creatures (stupid, i know, but all too real). and some platonic relationships are just too sensitive in other parameters (?) to permit extremely open sharing of information - for example despite the fact i'm *very* close friends with my roommate, this is one of those taboo subjects that we just don't bring up, though we joke about other stuff (perhaps it's just the gender sensitivity thing; if i were a dude he might not be so cautious, kinda thing... or maybe we've just adopted each other as surrogate siblings, who knows) and, finally, some people, despite being mature well rounded individuals would still be somewhat iffy about discussing something so private, 'secret' and personal. like LunaticFringe alluded to, masturbation is something uniquely personal. i mean we can all relate to good, bad, great and embarrassing sex. but your personal time alone? that's something kind of on a whole other level.

i don't know if any of that made any sense. but i also don't want to unduly cast aspersion onto your friend; the fact that you're able to discuss such things comfortably with an x speaks volumes for your own maturity and sense of balance. perhaps gently confronting her (just be kind, don't be pushy) about her response would help her realise it was a little one-sided and/or provoke a little introspection on her part. i know i had friends at that age who called bullshit on me when i pulled this sort of thing, and i can't thank them enough.

As a wise person with opposable thumbs once said: Those that can, do. Those that can't, preach.

and jrossi, both you and your girl's comments are priceless! "Pterodactyl scratching" must join the list.

Since the phrase "War on Terror" is being phased out, even by Admin hacks, perhaps we can term opposition to disseminating sex ed, condoms, family planning info, etc. as the "War on Ptero"?

Ceiling cat is watching you discussing about masturbation.

Don't mind me.... go on....

I think it's kind of like bubble gum - vital in your teens, a guilty pleasure by your early 30's, sort of banal by your 50's, completely pointless once you've outlived your permanent teeth.

Is that a pack of Juicy Fruit in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

I'm surprised no one else quoted Woody Allen: "Masturbation is sex with someone I love."

Thirding the crack-up jrossi4r!

Yeah, it's natural, but having some drunken frat boy grill me about the details of how isn't my idea of fun.

And there is something to be said that the therapeutic effects on the prostate,

Who is the drunken frat boy? CitrusFreak?

Yeah, it's natural, but having some drunken frat boy grill me about the details of how isn't my idea of fun.
I'm going to go ahead and assume that wasn't directed at me? lol

Nahhh, this was some time ago.

the "War on Ptero"
Hee!

Nahhh, this was some time ago.
Down with drunken frat boys all the same!

Also, I've got some awesome ideas for a tshirt that involves our newest catchphrase.