My calendar, which notes all sorts of weird holidays, says that today is International Balloon Liberation Day.

The BLF (Balloon Liberation Front) is behind this, with obvious assistance from the Heliumistas.

We are The Balloon Liberation Front! We seek freedom for all Inflatable Americans! We will no longer sit idly as our brothers and sisters are contorted into whimsical animals for your festive pleasure! We will find your mouth and make your voice really high-pitched!

I like to think there's some sort of party. Perhaps a potluck. They're jetting off for a few stolen hours before returning to their earthbound responsibilities.

They're going to that great balloon home in the sky.

Most of them are going off to litter a far off part of the world. Maybe the central US, maybe Japan, maybe the East Coast, who knows? Those balloons are adventurers. It'll take them at least 5-10 years to decay, so they'll have plenty of time to brighten up the beaches of the world. Some of them will go the extra step and choke a bird or a turtle to death. Others might be inclined to find their way into dolphins and whales. The world is theirs to seize! Hooray!

That might explain why the seagull on the opposite rooftop looks forlorn as he balances on the edge. I think he may jump.

I would like to think the balloons are being used by mice to achieve rodentkind's highest free fall. If you hear popping sounds outside, those are in fact small white mice breaking the sound barrier in their pressure suits.

They are also in collusion with the children of the world, developing a secret space program. Initial results look promising, but they keep losing the damned rockets.

It's the new planet. Gliese 581 c or bust!