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25 March 2007

I reported my neighbour to the police today and now I'm scared [More:]I've had some concerns about the guy who lives upstairs from me for a couple of years. He has a vile temper and I've heard him screaming at people on the phone. Probably five times in the last two years, women have left his flat in a hurry, after I've heard yelling/screaming, sometimes in the early hours of the morning.

The women are prostitutes, and I say this with some certainty. He is 60-ish, the women I've seen leaving his flat in daylight are all late teens or early 20s, and wearing short skirts, high heels, skimpy tops (even in winter).

Yesterday evening there were police at his flat for some time. (I saw them leave. They were not 'uniform' coppers, but wore navy blue sweaters with 'Police' on the back.)

Later he went out and returned just as I was going to bed, probably around 2am (our clocks went forward last night). He was not alone.

This morning I'd just got up and I heard what sounded like a scuffle, something being knocked over, raised voices. A short while after that a taxi drew up (from a local company), and a young woman, who was crying, walked over to it. A few minutes later she was back at his door and the cab had gone.

Because his flat is the top floor, he has an intercom, and she was talking to him through that, trying to get him to let her in. I could hear her from my bathroom, she was saying "you promised to take me home, the cab was £35, I don't have any money".

Then I heard her say "If you don't let me in, I'll tell the police about ..." (didn't hear the rest). He must have said "how do you know about that?" because then she said "because I heard the recorded message when you came in". I think he must have threatened her because she began crying and begging "please, please, Vic, don't, I won't tell, I promise".

Anyway, I had to go out and as I did, I asked her if she was ok. "Not really" she said. Then she asked me how to get to Kilburn (which is a hell of a way from here, although it's do-able on the Tube). I said if she wanted I'd give her a lift to the station, but she said she didn't have any money for a ticket. I told her not to worry about that.

So, we got in the car and as we drove away she began crying again, I think with relief that she was away from him.

She told me that he'd pulled over in his car in Kilburn and picked her up last night. Obviously she was a working girl, although neither of us mentioned that. She said that she'd gone back to his flat, he'd made her a drink and the next thing she knew she'd come to and found herself tied to a chair. She was terrified, and the noise I'd heard was her smashing the chair to free herself. He'd promised to take her home, but obviously decided not to.

She said he is very, very weird and she thought she'd had a lucky escape.

I took her to the station, showed her which trains to get (she's from Leeds and not familiar with the Underground) and gave her a fiver for her ticket. The last thing she said as she went off to get her train was "if you hear anything else like that again, promise me you'll call the police".

I am so concerned about this that I drove to the local station and spoke to a woman officer. She took the details and someone will call me. I said that I'm worried about this being traced back to me, but she put a 'do not divulge' next to my name and phone number. If there is a follow-up to this, then he will not know if it is me or her who's reported it.

Jeez, I knew he was a creep but, fuck, he's a total sicko. I just hope there isn't any comeback to me from this. He must have known I know about what happened because he would have seen her get in my car. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything, but next time it could be worse, he could really hurt someone.


Holy crap, ej. How attached are you to this flat? Have you thought about getting the landlord involved?
posted by mullacc 25 March | 06:45
whoah. Very, very creepy, jan. I would have done the same thing, though. I think it might be worthwhile to reconnect with the woman officer, and reiterate your fears, and see if she has any advice for you.

The thing is, that because she is a 'working girl' it's presumably not very likely that she would ever contact the authorities about this guy, so, despite the "do not divulge", if he did see you give this woman a ride, he can probably figure out that it probably was you who spoke to the police.

What about your other neighbors? Can you turn to them for help, in, at least, looking out for you and being extra aware of any strange noises or anything at all out of the ordinary? Is there someone with whom you can arrange a regular check-in arrangement, where, say, you call them every X hours, and if you don't, they know something is wrong?

(also, if it helps at all, and I know it doesn't, these guys who prey on the most vulnerable are not necessarily likely to ratchet it up to people who are stronger and more securely placed in the system, even if they have a grudge. Obviously, one cannot count on this, though. Gah.)
posted by taz 25 March | 06:55


Man, you did the right thing; just think how horrified you would've been if something had happened and you wouldn't have done anything. I hope I have the guts to do what you did, and yeah--take mullacc's advice.

PS. How about a crash-course in survival training as well.;)
Just kidding; they say humour is a nice way to ease the tension during such frustrating times?
posted by hadjiboy 25 March | 06:56
I don't have any useful advice, but holy hell, your nieghbor sounds like very bad stuff! Maybe call every authority available and get a hotel room? I'll spot you some cash, I'm sure some others here will too. Email me if you gotta.
posted by maryh 25 March | 06:57
It's not a rented flat, mullacc, in the UK you can buy a flat on a long lease (ours are 1000 years) and you pay a nominal rent (£10 a year) to the freeholder. So it's like owning a house. When you sell the flat, what you actually sell is the remaining term on the lease. The landlord doesn't really get involved, although there are clauses in the leases about 'quiet enjoyment' and not causing a nuisance.

I think this guy is into some seriously dodgy stuff and I hope it's only a matter of time before the police catch up with him.

Also, my flat and his at the moment are classified as 'unsaleable' because there's a huge tree (in his yard) which is causing damage to the foundations. The building insurance which covers the block will deal with it, but it'll take a couple of years for it all to be sorted out as the movement in the foundation has to be monitored over time. So for the time being I can't move anywhere, even if I wanted to. I've been here 11 years now and, apart from this prick, it's the most perfect place I've ever lived.
posted by essexjan 25 March | 06:57
So there's no equivalent to the Home Owners' Associations we have in the US? I don't think a US HOA could do anything to this guy unless he was convicted of a crime, but it could serve as a good way to warn the residents and humiliate him in the process.

In any case, checking in with the other neighbors, like taz said, is a great idea. Perhaps one of them has seen something similar and called the cops too--by connecting with them you'd relieve the both of you of the fear that this dick will single either one of you out.

posted by mullacc 25 March | 07:10
What a jerk. Well done to essexjan for doing the right thing even if it is scary.
posted by grouse 25 March | 07:12
None of the neighbours have called the cops on him before, although they are aware of his weirdness and temper (he has a habit of putting anonymous notes on people's cars if they park in a way he doesn't like, for example. We all know it's him).

What worries me is that our flats are at the end of the close, and the doors are down the side. So unlike the other flats where their doors face those of their next-door neighbour, there's just my door and his. So if he did try to kick off at me, it'd be hard to get away. I do have steel doors, though, with deadbolts. I think I'll get into the habit of locking the deadbolts when I'm home. The patio door is always deadbolted, but the front door is usually just pulled to. It can't be opened from outside without a key, but if I lock the deadbolt from the inside too, it'll give me a bit more security.
posted by essexjan 25 March | 07:19
Jan... I'm just sort of riffing on different thoughts here, but, for one thing, if you don't have a mobile (cell phone, USians), it may be a good idea to go ahead and get one and keep it always handy. (Hey, even I have one now - it's not a disgrace! :) )

I would probably use it as an excuse to get a dog, because I've always wanted a dog anyway. Have you always wanted a dog?

I would also get a security expert to check my place, and make changes if I could afford that, or if not, make whatever smart changes I could on my own. (on preview, it sounds like your situation is fairly secure - make sure it is!) Determine the most vulnerable points in your regular routine, and do whatever you can to eliminate the factors that make you vulnerable then. Get the most potent pepper spray (or whatever it's called) thingy available, and have it on your person pretty much all the time - not at the bottom of your bag, but like attached to a belt, or somehow instantly accessible.

Even if you haven't talked to your neighbors, do so now.
posted by taz 25 March | 07:25
If you have a cell phone, I would recommend keeping it charged and with you at all times. I have been stuck in my bedroom, scared and without a phone, wanting to kick myself for keeping it on the charger in the kitchen.

I would also recommend speaking with some of your closer neighbors about your concerns so they can help monitor the situation. Keep your head up, make normal eye contact with him when you see him - looking away or staring him down will just make it obvious that you feel guilty about something. If he confronts you (which it doesn't sound like he will - he likes to be in control and on the offense with someone weaker then him, confronting an unknown someone is really a defensive action), tell him that you mind your own business and not concerned with his. I would then document any contact he has with you and store that information someplace secure and check in with the female officer regularly until you see something being down about him.

If you really want to get rid of him, call the cops everytime he does something harassing - like the flyers, loud noises in the middle of the night (that can be heard from outside, not just in your flat), etc. He will get the hint that people are watching him and may make the decision to leave on his own, with or without selling.
posted by blackkar 25 March | 07:35
Si to everything blackar said. I was just thinking that he probably feels very exposed right now, and that this is probably a good thing. If he understands that he won't get by with anything there, he may move. Good neighbors can be helpful here.

and... if I'm understanding your description of where your door is, and where his is, and how invisible this might be from other neighbors, you might put a security camera there, or even just a fake security camera until you figure out how to put a real one - probably with help from mechans/mefites.
posted by taz 25 March | 07:40
I have a mobile, taz, rarely keep it charged though. (It's plugged in now!).

And a dog isn't really an option. I have two cats, and some days when I'm in the office and have a commitment after work, I can be out for 15 hours straight. No fair on a dog. Plus, I don't particularly like them anyway.

Pepper spray is illegal here, I think.

I hope this creep is intelligent enough to realise that if he was to start on me I'd have a restraining injunction against him the following day and wouldn't hesitate to throw his arse into jail if he breached it.
posted by essexjan 25 March | 07:42
Okay, definitely keep the phone charged and to hand always. Check with the appropriate shops to find out what self-defense options exist. Speak to the neighbors, for sure, and as blackkar suggests, make sure to appear composed if you see him in passing. Avoiding his gaze or appearing to be afraid would be the worst, I imagine. Assured and confident is best, even if you need to summon all your powers to fake it for 30 seconds.
posted by taz 25 March | 07:54
Jan, I am so sickened by your story. We know these things happen, but how horrifying to see it unfolding right in your own neighborhood.

The personal security suggestions above are all good and I hope you integrate as many of them as make sense. Especially the one about talking to your neighbors; you don't want to set off a hysteria, but you may find that others have more information and perhaps you can urge them to make a police report, as well, and in addition you can keep an eye on one another. The self-defense class is never a bad idea; I took a couple in college and found them (I guess) useful. They weren't about karate moves and such so much as the psychology of confrontation - for instance, aggressors sometimes depend too much on their power of intimidation and expect their targets to be quietly subdued, so apparently if you start yelling your head off ridiculously at the first approach, they sometimes back off. The other thing I have kept with me from those courses is how to project confidence when walking along the street (makes you less likely to be selected as a target), and how to always have a plan. Even though I'm not a fearful person, usually in any public place I've noted the exits and barriers and thought about what I would do if I needed to get away from someone. In any case, it was a confidence builder to take the classes.

(Pepper spray illegal? Oh my. That's too bad).

I have nothing further to add, but may I just once again congratulate you and say how much I admire you for having the courage and generosity of spirit not to look in the opposite direction. Who knows how many others would have shut the curtains and gone on making coffee (or tea :) ). You were there when this one woman needed you, and you may have helped put the wheels in motion to bring official attention to a criminal before things get worse, or he moves on to more victims. It's scary, yes, but speaking up about things that are wrong often is, and now you know you are the kind of person who will do it. You did the right thing, and I hope it is soon safely resolved.
posted by Miko 25 March | 07:54
I'm surprised the girl doesn't have a pimp -- drugging her and not even paying her sounds like something a pimp wouldn't take lightly, Mr. Creepo deserves to have two words with a pissed off pimp.
posted by matteo 25 March | 08:00
If you're worried, The Women's Aid Foundation has a Mobile Phone Scheme where any button you press will automatically call the Police. They're used mainly for sufferers of domestic violence but it may be worth phoning, explaining your situation and seeing if you can get your hands on a phone. Keep it on charge and close to hand at all times.

This is a shitty situation to be in, and if I were you I'd be scared too. Know that you did the right thing. Fear is a great enabler for criminals like this and the fact that you went to the Police says a great deal about your moral goodness. Proud of you e/j. You're a star.
posted by seanyboy 25 March | 08:06
This may seem like overkill for your situation, but everyone should have at least one contingency plan in place - men, women, and children. Lots of people grow complacent in their surroundings and that is when bad things happen - date rape, etc. More people are hurt and killed by people they know than people they don't know.

If you are truly concerned about personal retaliation from him (again, it seems doubtful), make sure that you are fully aware of your surroundings. Check your patio door every night before you enter your flat - actually check that you can't open the door and there are no scratches, etc. on the frame, so you know that no one is in your home. If it is a sliding door, but a broom handle in the bottom track on the inside for added security (you can do this with wooden dowels in regular sized windows as well). If you are super tired when you return from one of your long days at work, pump yourself up for that last block home - be very awake and observant as you get closer to your entryway.

If pepper spray is illegal, you can still use other aerosol sprays - Pam or hairspray in the eyes still stings enough for you to get away (plus the sheer surprise at being retaliated against).

I would also recommend looking into what other weapons you keep in the house to feel safe. Baseball bats are useless - you can't get a good swing and they are easily deflected.

Anything can be a weapon, if you think about it in advance. Knives are an easy choice in the house, just don't walk around like Jamie Lee Curtis, holding it out in front of you. Keep it close to your body, up near your chest facing out if you think someone may grab you from behind. If someone attacks you from the front, hold it down by your hip, face up, to jab into the belly area.

Keys are good too, but make sure that you don't hold them between all of your fingers, only between your thumb and forefinger - otherwise, an attacker can just grab a few keys and squeeze, hurting you more than them. If possible, aim for the base of the throat. If you don't have keys or have dropped them, take your two index fingers and jab them in there - it will make your attacker choke (and scare the bejebus out of him). You can kill someone this way, but if it's them or you, always chose you.
posted by blackkar 25 March | 08:18
I'm not afraid of him attacking me physically, but intimidating me and making me feel afraid to be in my own home that I'm worried about. Maybe I'm worrying too much about this already!

I just talked to my biker neighbours and also to an old lady who's lived here since the year dot. Neither of them can bear this creep.
posted by essexjan 25 March | 08:27
biker neighbours

Now there's a good sign!
posted by Miko 25 March | 08:31
Yeah. The old dears were horrified when Kate and Jamie the bikers moved in, with several Harleys (which they keep in their very well-locked garage - two of them are vintage rarities).

But they're the sweetest people you could meet, and all the old ladies love them now.

The guy upstairs, on the other hand, looks on paper as if he should be a good neighbour - single man, no pets or kids, plenty of money, drives a big flashy Merc. He is slime.
posted by essexjan 25 March | 08:34
I would say that you should try to remain calm about this. Nothing you've said indicates that he'll attack you physically and I suspect that any guy who has to drug and restrain women is probably not so brave.

I would suggest having a personal alarm - you know those really ear splitting ones - and keeping it to hand when you enter and exit the building. That should be enough to keep him at bay.

Anyway, I think you're doing all the right things here.
posted by dodgygeezer 25 March | 08:47
Good god, what a bizarre series of events!

As the others have said, good for you for getting involved and not just looking the other way.
posted by BoringPostcards 25 March | 08:53
Gosh, EJ that is not fun. The guys does sound like quite the supreme asshole. I wish it wasn't the situation for you, and that he moves along one way or another very soon. And yeah the bikers are a good thing. It sounds like you have decent neighbors otherwise, but keeping your eyes open isn't a bad thing regardless. It's been helpful to read this thread even not being in such a circumstance. Stay safe, and vigilant.

And wow! 1000 year lease?!
posted by chewatadistance 25 March | 09:10
I know! The lease thing! So odd sounding to Americans.
posted by Miko 25 March | 09:24
The Straight Dope on 99 and 999 year leases.
posted by grouse 25 March | 09:29
This creep won't last long in that building; he's the type who wants privacy for the shit he does and now you and your neighbors are on to him. He'll be gone soon so don't worry too much, Jan. Good luck and congrats for having the courage to report him.
posted by hojoki 25 March | 09:33
Essexjan, good for you to get involved. How terrifying for this woman/women to be drugged and tied to a chair. This guy can't be arrested soon enough.
posted by LoriFLA 25 March | 09:33
oh! The ear-splitting alarm thing is great - especially once you've talked to the neighbors. Very, very good precaution.

I'm also agreeing with those who say that he is probably feeling very exposed, and I'm hoping that this means he will move. But, one must be on guard, because there's no assurance that he will behave in a predictable way.
posted by taz 25 March | 09:40
I wouldn't worry too much. You did the right thing, and my friend who is a 20 year veteran Baltimore city police officer says that actually, revenge is so rare as to be practically unheard of. He says that it's movies & tv that make people think that criminals go around plotting revenge on those who turned them in, but in actual fact what happens is they mutter about it a little and move on. There's no immediate profit in revenge, so they mostly don't bother. I'm glad you have other cool neighbors and I bet he'll never do anything even if he does find out it was you. Yay superhero EJ defender of the downtrodden!
posted by mygothlaundry 25 March | 09:47
*whew*

This was beginning to sound like quite the Brit Crime Caper, with surly men driving around in Mercs, and flats with a thousand year leases (only in gay old England!), and prostitutes and pimps.

Again, hats off to essexjan for helping out a person in distress.:)
posted by hadjiboy 25 March | 09:59
I wouldn't disagree with you, mgl, but I would also guess that in those situations where revenge crimes do actually occur, it's probably much more likely that they occur among people who live very near each other (probably, much more likely). I'm just guessing! And I really don't want jan to be constantly fearful, but I wouldn't want her to dismiss the threat here, either. [NOT AN EXPERT]
posted by taz 25 March | 10:20
mgl called it. This guy doesn't want complications in his life, that's why he picks up hookers. Hell, he even drugs them which tells me he doesn't even want a woman whose company he's paying for to complicate his pleasure. Revenge is a hassle and often doesn't pay off so being a coward, he'd rather leave than bother with it.
posted by hojoki 25 March | 10:33
Wow, how scary. It was good of you to help the girl out, ej. I wouldn't necessarily take everything she said as gospel, though (if she was so afraid of him, for instance, having been drugged and tied up and all, why was she trying to get him to let her back in?). I have no doubt the guy's a grade-A creep, though. My advice, and it may not be the most courageous advice, but if it was me, I'd stay out of it as much as I could. Maybe get the neighbors to call in complaints to the police along with you when there's a disturbance in progress, since the neighbors already don't like him either. That way, all the pressure and attention's not just on you, and if it's a disturbance in progress, he may be more likely to get in trouble than a report after-the-fact. Be safe.
posted by Pips 25 March | 10:48
My God. What a situation. I hope this guy winds up in prison soon, Jan.
posted by Orange Swan 25 March | 11:22
Maybe get the neighbors to call in complaints to the police along with you when there's a disturbance in progress, since the neighbors already don't like him either.

I think that's a great idea. I was going to suggest seeing if there's some sort of community safety committee, or even just a neighborhood association, that you can bring this to? The one I used to be part of very much emphasized that having a group of people calling every little transgression in (we had a fair amount of drug dealing and grafitti, which is not the end of the world but can lead to worse things) was the best way of getting the police to take notice and stay on top of things. (The police officers at the meeting agreed.)

But most of all, how wonderful that you did get involved. Good for you.
posted by occhiblu 25 March | 11:22
If you're pretty sure the girl you gave a lift to isn't going to be in danger over it, I'd be inclined to publicize it (just in your building). Not only meet his eyes but look contemtuous when you do. When you're talking to a neighbor and he walks by you both look at him and laugh as though you're talking about him. The way I see it, once he KNOWS the whole building knows, there won't be any point in hassling just you.

Making sure your locks work, and having a personal alarm and cell phone make sense to me, but the other things, like baseball bats, only make sense if you're strong enough (or he's weak enough) for them to be effective. This is why I like pistols, but if pepper spray's illegal, I'm guessing you're out of luck on the handgun front, too.

I'm guessing that if you can't move, he can't move either?
posted by small_ruminant 25 March | 11:39
And good for you for helping out!
posted by small_ruminant 25 March | 11:40
Another voice saying good for you, Jan, for gettiing involved and helping that woman out! I hope the police take this very seriously.

Great ideas here re: safety - I especially second the ideas of getting together a neighborhood group and having a personal alarm. And do make sure your doors and windows are secure on a daily basis (a good tip for any woman, I think).
posted by scody 25 March | 12:07
apparently the blue-sweatered vice boys are already onto him, no? perhaps you should inform the blue-sweater squad that he was back up to shenanigans soon after they left. (or, perhaps he's a retired cop himself, and they were just pals paying him a visit. not trying to scare you but all angles should be considered.)
posted by quonsar 25 March | 12:14
Maybe if you and the biker neighbors went and spoke to the landlord together? Is the smegma neighbor intimidated by the male biker? Also, I've read that it's better to use a pen rather than keys, because you don't want to lose your keys in a scuffle.

Pips, most likely the woman was so desperate for the money (drug addict?) that she was willing to risk getting hurt again. It's my understanding that in the UK prostitution is legal behind closed doors, but not on the street.

I'm pulling for you, ej.
posted by brujita 25 March | 12:21
No quonsar, he's not a retired cop, most definitely not.

And yes, I know I only heard what the girl told me, but I also heard stuff being knocked over upstairs and her saying "why are you doing this?". And there's been other women leaving - no, fleeing - in the middle of the night after I've been woken up to the sounds of some kind of disturbance.

I think she thought that she'd run out of options when she was asking him to let her back in, just so he could take her home. She had no money and had no idea where she was other than in the middle of a forest.

The trouble is, the way these flats are designed, I'm usually the only person to hear a disturbance, if it's coming from his bedroom. Occasionally the people who live in the next-door upstairs flat hear him, but only if it's very loud.

Thanks everyone for all the good suggestions, advice and support. I know I did the right thing and I did enough domestic violence work as a family lawyer to get some idea of when someone is genuinely frightened, and I'm certain this poor girl was terrified.
posted by essexjan 25 March | 12:26
I'm so proud of you for getting involved and helping. Hopefully this will be a case where the police actually do something and it doesn't end up in a tragic news story. It's going to be pretty damn scary for a while, but you definitely did the right thing. I hope it all works out for the best.
posted by TheDonF 25 March | 15:00
It would seem pepper spray's illegal in most places.
Chili oil is very cheap, and a handful of scotch bonnet peppers aren't really expensive. Were you to boil the peppers for a while and then put the water into a spray bottle, you'd have a simple approximation of pepper spray.
posted by Zack_Replica 25 March | 15:38
My experience with creepy neighbors is that they're a lot scarier when you don't talk to your neighbors. Once you band together, these guys just fold. I suppose that's typically with most bullies. You did the right thing, keep connected with your neighbors and band together to make this guy feel like the slime he is, and I predict he'll slink away.
posted by Jasper 25 March | 16:09
Zack_Replica, good thinking, but in the UK "any weapon of whatever description designed or adapted for the discharge of any noxious liquid, gas or other thing" is illegal under the gun laws (at least according to wikipedia).
posted by matthewr 25 March | 18:15
It goes beyond just discharging weapons to any sort of offensive weapon.

"Any person who, without lawful authority or reasonable excuse, the proof whereof lies on him, has with him in any public place any offensive weapon is guilty of an offence and liable on conviction on indictment to imprisonment for a term not exceeding four years or to a fine or to both, or on summary conviction to imprisonment for a term not exceeding six months or to a fine not exceeding the prescribed sum or to both." (Halsbury's Laws of England: Criminal Law, Evidence, and Procedure s 699).

Continuously carrying a weapon for self-defence is not a reasonable excuse (footnote 2).
posted by grouse 25 March | 18:31
Sorry to hear of this, essexjan. Hard as it is at the moment, in my experience, doing the right thing, as you have, brings its own courage. And while I doubt very much your immediate neighbor will confront you directly under normal circumstances, you, more than other people, know to be especially concerned if his behaviors include excessive drinking, as all bets are off if he gets "whisky brave and stupid." I'd also observe that it might be good if you could keep your cats entirely indoors for a couple of weeks, just to keep on the safe side.

Good luck, and good on you, for doing what you could.
posted by paulsc 25 March | 18:58
I can't add anything that hasn't already been said.

(((essexjan)))
posted by deborah 25 March | 21:10
EJ -- I echo all the great suggestions people have mentioned above, and I'm glad you know you did the right thing. Keep safe, & I'm thinking of ya.
posted by viachicago 25 March | 21:56
Good on you for speaking out - most people wouldn't have in the same situation, I'm sure. I agree that the odds of any kind of revenge attack are slight, because scum like that are too weak to attack anyone they perceive as stronger than them, but you should be extra careful for a while.

I hope it turns out OK for you and any more victims he lures into his trap - I just hope something nasty happens to him before he gets to escalate his little games. Maybe the biker boys can pay him a little visit or, at least, make some kind of show of "intimidation by accident" at some stage? With very few exceptions, bikers don't take well to people like that (especially in their own backyard).
posted by dg 25 March | 22:10
I wanted to link back to a quote I read once on AskMeta, but since I can't do that: I remember reading a quote once from someone, in a thread regarding anger management, on how they lived their life trying to have a parental view of the world- to not be passive, but to handle life as it comes. You handled this situation in a caring, loving way; you are the kind of person I strive to emulate in my life. I lift my glass of Kool-Aid to you. ::cheers::
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 25 March | 23:12
Can asbo's be started anonymously?
posted by brujita 25 March | 23:25
And was that his car on which your cat was giving the "get stuffed" look on flickr? ;-)
posted by brujita 25 March | 23:27
No to both questions, brujita :-)
posted by essexjan 26 March | 11:13
Smile, and the world smiles with you… || Radio Question

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