MetaChat - Yay! Billy's back!

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23 March 2007

Yay! Billy's back! →[More:]After having his ad deleted 3 times in as many days, Billy posted his "Come sleep in my bed for $300" ad again today. He's trying a different tack this time; he omitted his picture.

What I don't get is that this guy is obviously desparate and horny. He has a one-legged Ukrainian woman throwing herself at him, but he keeps posting those ads.

He hasn't written Olena back yet, but she's posted two ads urging him to (screenshot here, for when they all get deleted).

She also sent him an email intended to make him like her. So she can stay with him.

As per Miko's request, she also created a MySpace page.

Previously: 1, 2.

From: Olena
To: Billy
Date: Mar 23, 2007 2:30 PM
Subject: Re: It is about the CraigsList house!

Mr Billyhoo!! Hi you!!! This is Olena!! LOL!!! :)

I make a message for you on the Craigs List. It is about the house!!! :)

I am like to stay at you but you have not write me. I ask you the many question. So I can stay at you!

Mr Billy are you not to like me? This is Olena! Every person who I know can like Olena! Are you not to like the hamsters? It is OK!!!! It is not necessary!!! Is it the leg????? LOL!

;) <--- This is the smile with only one eye!!!

Mr Billy I am to make you to like me. I am to tell you the story so now you are to like me. And than I can stay with you! It is important!!!

On here is the story!

I am born in Ukraine. I tell it to you in the beginning before now! LOL! Can you remember it?? But anyway! In Ukraine I live with my mother and my father and the Also Wife. It is when the man make the marry with the woman and then with the OTHER woman!!! The Also Wife! In Ukraine it is in every day that a man make an Also Wife. But in America it is not so! LOL!!!

In Ukraine we are not have very pretty much money. My father make the potato and my mother clean the clothings at the river. The Also Wife have a daughter and they have the sex with the men sometimes for the grain and the pig. But it is OK! It is not like America!! At the river where my mother clean the clothings there is soldiers and many angry dogs. One arm has many holes from angry dogs of 1987!!! LOL!!! When I am a girl I learn very pretty much English. It is in the school!!! I learn also about the Mr Disney Mickey Mouse! He is Important!!!

When I am 14 I am quit the school to help make the potato. But there is one day that is very important! In this day I am help my father with make the potato and there is a man!! With the clothings on him!!! LOL! The man is name is I can not tell you. But anyway! The man is big Television Man from Kyiv!! (It is a city!) He is ask me to carry with him to Kyiv and be in the television! He say to me: "Вы прекрасны, как рыба с жемчугом в ее глазах, но я превращу Вас в тигра с благосостоянием." And I say YES!!!

My father he is not happy because he must now make the potato alonely. But it is OK!! But anyway! I am go to Kyiv and I am in the television for many years! It is name is Love Healing. The television!! I am portray Katya! In Ukraine I am many famous for the years but they give me an other name. In the television I am not Olena! LOLOLOL!!!!! Is that funny? Yes!!

When the television end the Television Man carry me to America to be in Hollywood!!! I am very pretty much want to go!!! Because in Hollywood is where the Mr Disney Mickey Mouse live!! And when I get to Hollywood I am going to walk to Mr Disney Mickey Mouse house and I am going to stop at his door and say "Hi! I am Olena!!!" And then he will hug me!!! LOL!

But the Television Man leave me in Oregonian and take my money! This is now 18 months and I can not find him in any place!!! When I find him I am to kick him very pretty hard! Because he take my money!!

Wait! Look at what I say!!! LOL! I am Olena! I can not kick him!!! Ha ha ha!!! But when I find him I will remove my other leg and I will punch him with it very pretty hard! LOL!!! :) :) :) :)

In one time in the other year I go to Disneyland! It was before the leg!! It is not the where Mr Disney Mickey Mouse live but it is the where he has the work! Are you ever to go to Disneyland? I go to Disneyland with Iryna and Ronnie in the other year because Ronnie make a business there! Ronnie make his business with the Mexican man and Iryna and me go to ride the Teacups! The Teacups move very fast! And we sit in them!!! LOL!!! And than we eat the taco!

Mr Billyhoo can you like the taco? The taco is my big favorite food from America!! It has the lettuce! And the onions!!!

OK. Mr Billy! I think now can you to like me! Is it true?? LOL!!!

Mr Billy I send you the question. I am very pretty much want you to write me about the house on Craigs List. And the question! And you can ask me the question and I will tell you every thing!!! OK?? Yes! LOL!!!

Mr Billy I am you friend!!!

OK!

This was Olena! LOL!!

Now you answer and I wait! :)

post by: mudpuppie at: 17:45 | 17 comments

What a weird fellow. Flagged.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 23 March | 17:56

Oh, my lordy lord. Oh, no. Oh. God.

I thought the MySpace was just perfect...and then the music started.

How do ya do it, pup? How? In all seriousness, man, are you good at the satire. Yes!!! It is the good!! You write the very funny and should be more famous than Mr. David Sedaris.

posted by Miko 23 March | 18:09

I hate to spoil your fun, and I certainly do admire your creativity, but isn't this game of taunt-the-nutter a little cruel and unnecessary?

posted by Quentin 23 March | 18:11

If he were the average nutter, I'd say yes. But he's trying to scam women into sleeping with him. Repeatedly. So I'd say no.

posted by mudpuppie 23 March | 18:13

I'm with pup. The hilarious, hilarious, ingenious pup.

That myspacepage... I don't even know what to say.

posted by Specklet 23 March | 18:18

Perhaps (I'm not sure anything this obvious counts as a scam). But by wasting a little of his time it's not like you're stopping him. Flag his postings, complain to craigslist, write your congressman, picket his bathroom, all laudable. But playing it for entertainment isn't nice.

posted by Quentin 23 March | 18:26

On the other hand, who cares if it isn't nice? Like this guy is going to find out Olena isn't real and cry?

And OMG, she has a Chihuahua MySpace template, yaaaay!

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 23 March | 18:37

Quentin, it's definitely counts as a scam. It pains me to say it, but there are plenty of unintelligent women out there who might actually respond to his ad.

And as far as "playing it for entertainment" is concerned, the guy hasn't written Olena back, so chances are good that he's onto the fact that it's a joke. It's no skin off his nose if we are amused by pup's harmless shennanigans.

On preview: what TPS said.

posted by Specklet 23 March | 18:40

But playing it for entertainment isn't nice.

If you repeatedly post an ad on craigslist in the subletting section looking for women to trade sex for rent, you deserve to be fucked with mercilessly, just like you deserve to be fucked with if you send out spam or try to scam people on eBay. If his ad was in erotic services or something, fine, I doubt anyone would have even seen it. But it isn't, and it isn't in erotic services because the guy is a shitbag. I doubt he even believes that Oleyna exists, but it's good fun for the rest of us to read.

mudpuppie: Would it be bad if people friended Oleyna?

posted by cmonkey 23 March | 18:40

she needs friends, I sent a request from my band ;)

posted by krix 23 March | 18:50

Heh. I wondered who that was.

Friend away!

posted by mudpuppie 23 March | 18:51

oh

my

god

!!

brilliant.

posted by lonefrontranger 23 March | 18:58

This is Amanda!!!!! I am very much want be Olena's myspace friend! I have sent the request!!!!!11 LOL!!!! ;) :) :)

posted by youngergirl44 23 March | 19:00

I remember the angry dogs of 1987.

posted by WolfDaddy 23 March | 19:20

Aaaand, he's gone.

posted by Specklet 23 March | 20:03

It is ~~good~~GREAT fun...very well executed, mudpuppie.

But is quite mean-spirited and the fake CL ads Olena posts are pure noise.

posted by danostuporstar 23 March | 20:22

I'm kinda failing to see how it's more mean-spirited than trying to trick poor women into sleeping with you, in exchange for housing. Because that seems quite mean-spirited to me. That in fact seems creepy and awful and exploitative and predatory to me.

And by "poor" I do mean "without money." There's a decent chance some woman gonna's say, Well, it's better than a shelter, and basically prostitute herself to this asshole. Or, at least, that's what he's hoping.

Except it's not even really prostitution, because she'd have to pay him for the pleasure of sleeping with him.

It's severely, severely fucked up.

posted by occhiblu 24 March | 13:12

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