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12 October 2006

My Jr. High Bully How I told him off and what happened next. →[More:]
My jr. high bully was the stereotypical big, dumb, popular jock. Everyone loved him and he hated me. A lot. I was a brainy little dork and, worse yet, a transplant from “the city.” I did not know my place and he felt it was his job to put me in it—to let me know that he found me ugly, that no one liked me and that I would never fit in. His minions followed suit. By eighth grade my father had to physically force me to go to school. When I locked myself in the bathroom to avoid the taunts of the popular kids, the school sent the guidance counselor and the janitor to get me out.

Things got better. High school brought a cool boyfriend and a fun group of friends. College was the most fun I’ve ever had. Still, as I'm sure many of you bunnies know, those wounds run deep.

So when I ran into him again at a party the summer after everyone had graduated college, I reflexively hid behind my friend. He still scared me. But he saw me anyway, came up to me and ….gave me a big hug, asked how I was and generally acted like we were the best of friends. Which REALLY PISSED ME OFF! How dare he?!?!

post by: jrossi4r at: 09:42 | 40 comments

We bumped into each other a few more times that summer. (It’s a small town.) Each time, he was warm and friendly and each time I SEETHED. Finally, at a party, I got drunk and brave enough to call him on it. I told him how much the things he’d said to me had hurt me and what a horrible person he was. All the things that I had wanted to say to him for years came bursting from my mouth in great molten chunks. He listened to every word. He took it all in. And when I was done…he hugged me. He made no excuses. He said he was a horrible person then and that he was ashamed of what he’d been like. He told me that I didn’t deserve to be treated that way and if he could take it back, he would. We talked for a long time about how hard adolescence was, so full of fears and doubts and mistakes. We parted as friends.

From then on, whenever our paths crossed, we were happy to see one another. We would often find a private corner to talk about politics (he was liberal!), movies (I was the only girl he knew who could quote Caddyshack and the Godfather), music (that was a tough one, but we agreed on the Rolling Stones). He was smart and he made me laugh and I made him laugh and neither of us was who were when we were 13.

We were married ten years ago today. Happy anniversary, mr. rossi.

posted by jrossi4r 12 October | 09:43

What a wonderful story. Happy anniversary, rossis!

posted by gaspode 12 October | 09:46

That is an AWESOME story!!!!

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 12 October | 09:49

Good story. It's always to good to see that people can grow and change. I took my share of bullying and I felt a lot better once I simply let it go years later. When you become a secure adult, it's a lot easier to write stuff like that off a childish stupidity and it's even better when you get some closure like you did.

posted by jonmc 12 October | 09:51

Thanks, everybody! It's quite John Hughsian, isn't it?

posted by jrossi4r 12 October | 09:59

Awwww.

posted by sciurus 12 October | 09:59

It's quite John Hughsian, isn't it?

Indeed. Let's have a dance montage interlude.

posted by jonmc 12 October | 10:00

Whoa. Totally freaky. Very well told. Hard to believe, too. Not that I don't believe you - I do. I'm just bamboozled and hornswaggled!

So you turned into a hottie and he changed his tune, right? :P

posted by iconomy 12 October | 10:01

That is so ridiculously sweet. Congrats to the two of you!

posted by Fuzzbean 12 October | 10:01

AW! What a fantastic story; I have actually have goosebumps. I really love bizarre no-possible-way-these-two-could-ever-get-together-in-real-life real life stories. Happy anniversary!

posted by taz 12 October | 10:01

Oh and Happy Anniversary, too. Any plans?

posted by iconomy 12 October | 10:04

Also, I didn't read the last line of the story until my third reload of the thread, since I am a moron. Happy anniversary. I'll be over in the corner smearing boogers on the wall.

posted by jonmc 12 October | 10:08

Happy anniversary, jrossi4r! What a sweet story - I love "how we met and fell in love" stories.

posted by muddgirl 12 October | 10:12

Wow, what an awesome story... my jaw dropped... Congratulations on your anniversary... many happy years!

I was all prepared to tell my story about Eric M. and how he turned the whole bus against me, including my best friend at the time... but love trumps hate anyday...

posted by Pips 12 October | 10:13

It is like that classmates.com ad that has been around for years.

posted by sciurus 12 October | 10:16

I rather like this story. I'd show it to a male friend of mine, but I don't really believe he's as bi as he says he is and I doubt he'd want to marry any of his high school bullies. ^_^

Congratulations! It just goes to show that geeky women rock, and so do perceptive and understanding jock-types.

posted by TrishaLynn 12 October | 10:23

Fantastic story, jrossi! Happy anniversary, and thanks for sharing. :D And good for you on kicking his ass!

posted by chewatadistance 12 October | 10:30

Whoa, that was an unexpected ending.

Congrats.

posted by danostuporstar 12 October | 10:31

So you turned into a hottie and he changed his tune, right?
Nah. I think it was our time away at college. It emboldened me and humbled him. He's like the Bumble after Hermie took his teeth out.

I still have the note he wrote me in 8th grade where he urged me to go to a "boarding school for the terminally ugly." It's in our wedding album.

I'm sure some people lost money on us. I bet we beat the spread when we went 6 months.

posted by jrossi4r 12 October | 10:32

I still have the note he wrote me in 8th grade where he urged me to go to a "boarding school for the terminally ugly."

As cruel taunts go, that's not half bad.

posted by jonmc 12 October | 10:36

That's a great story! Happy Anniversary and wishes for many more years.

posted by lilywing13 12 October | 10:36

So all this time you've been Molly Ringwald and haven't told us? For shame!

That's entirely too sweet. Congratulations!

posted by occhiblu 12 October | 10:42

That is an awesome story. Happy anniversary!

posted by sisterhavana 12 October | 10:43

Aww, that is so rad.

posted by cmonkey 12 October | 10:44

I was going to say "he obviously had a total crush on you", but when I got to the last line, I saw that you clearly figured that out for yourself, duh.

Calvin and Suzie? Or Bruce Willis and Cybill Shepherd in Moonlighting, or pretty much any story where the boy is so enamoured with the girl that he doesn't know how to behave.

Makes me ashamed to be a boy, sort of. But on the other hand it is such a sweet story and if he weren't such a boy the story wouldn't be as good.

Congratulations on your anniversary.

(Shane should post a Calvin & Suzie pic)

posted by GeckoDundee 12 October | 10:54

I still have the note he wrote me in 8th grade where he urged me to go to a "boarding school for the terminally ugly." It's in our wedding album.

I love this part. ^_^

posted by TrishaLynn 12 October | 11:00

I ♥ jrossi4r. That is a wonderful story. Happy anniversary!

posted by mike9322 12 October | 11:30

That story made my day.

posted by essexjan 12 October | 11:34

Awwww! What a wonderful ending. Like a little picture-book thing.

posted by flopsy 12 October | 11:54

I still have the note he wrote me in 8th grade where he urged me to go to a "boarding school for the terminally ugly." It's in our wedding album.

Sooooo cute. Now, I mean. And you saved the note!

posted by iconomy 12 October | 12:44

Many more happy years to you :)

posted by auntbunny 12 October | 13:02

Happy Tin Tenth Year!

posted by brujita 12 October | 13:27

He's like the Bumble after Hermie took his teeth out.

What a great reference that is!

posted by Doohickie 12 October | 13:38

Congradulamations!

Like taz, I had goosebumps. What a cool story!

posted by deborah 12 October | 15:32

wow, I really wasn't expecting that ending! So nice.
Happy Anniversary to you and your huzbully.

posted by Hellbient 12 October | 16:16

That's a great story, jrossi4r. Happy anniversary and happy birthday Mr. Rossi!

posted by me3dia 12 October | 16:42

that was so sweet! it made my eyes squinch up and grow awww! also it assured me that my bullying years will be paid back in words not bullets! phew!

posted by Mrs.Pants 12 October | 16:51

I loved this story.

posted by getoffmylawn 12 October | 17:01

Man, what a great ending! Congrats and blessings to you both!

posted by Specklet 12 October | 17:13

Great story, I love stuff like this! I totally didn't expect the ending, but it was fabulous! Happy, happy anniversary, and a happy 65 more!

posted by redvixen 12 October | 17:31

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