MetaChat - So why *are* manhole covers round?

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17 August 2006

So why *are* manhole covers round? What do you think I should put for my answer?

post by: TrishaLynn at: 10:10 | 27 comments

"Because the men who use them are tubular."

posted by Hugh Janus 17 August | 10:11

I believe the actual reason is that a circle is the only shape which cannot be rotated in any dimension which will drop through the hole.

posted by Miko 17 August | 10:14

"Because god got tired of fucking square manholes."

posted by Hugh Janus 17 August | 10:22

I suggest: "The better to poop on you."

(but that may not getcha that raise)

posted by Pips 17 August | 10:24

"Not all manhole covers are round."

posted by Hugh Janus 17 August | 10:25

I already said why, which is what Miko said more lucidly. However I suggest you answer "Because the Gnomes of Zurich will it so, all hail the ascended masters of Atlantis, sleeping the long sleep of nullity in their silent velvet tombs lo all these many dusty years soon to return and eat your fat sweaty face you fucking chiflito new boss asshole chickenfucker!"

If it's multiple choice that's usually D) remember, to darken the whole circle.

posted by Divine_Wino 17 August | 10:31

"Not sure, but if you'd like to know more about manholes (as you seem to), I can direct you to a few bars in the city. Stop by my cubicle."

or

"How should I know? Ask a man."

or

"Dunno - I call them womanholes. Bitch."

or

"Because, like pizzas, the roundness keeps the flavor in."

posted by Hellbient 17 August | 10:34

To best accommodate the beer bellies of ConEd workers.

posted by occhiblu 17 August | 10:51

"Man-what covers?"

posted by box 17 August | 10:58

Because it's easier to dig a round tunnel than a square tunnel.

posted by Specklet 17 August | 11:02

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by Pips 17 August | 11:17

"Round. What a funny word. Think about it. Say it out loud, go ahead, you'll see what I'm talking about. Rrroouunndd-ah. Rrroouunndd-ah. Rrround Rrosy went arround the rroad to rrrevisit Rricky. Funny word, indeed...Yup...mmhmm...Woah, that was an awkward silence there, eh? Strange when that happens...anyway, go ahead and stop by my cubicle if you'd like a bong hit."

posted by Hellbient 17 August | 11:17

*sits on edge of hellbient's desk/brings cookies*

posted by Pips 17 August | 11:19

"Excuse me--did you just call me a manhole?"

posted by box 17 August | 11:21

I never knew they could be so pretty:

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by Pips 17 August | 11:32

Miko: "I believe the actual reason is that a circle is the only shape which cannot be rotated in any dimension which will drop through the hole."

This is the answer they will be looking for, but it is, in fact, an incorrect assumption. A suitably large square manhole cover will also not rotate into a suitably small round or square hole. The real answer, therefore, is that it requires less material to achieve the suitable dimensions with a circle than a square. Short answer - circles are cheaper.

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 17 August | 11:45

Even though I hate almost all permutations of this joke, this is enough of a non sequitur for me:

1. Round manhole covers
2. ???
3. Profit!

posted by Eideteker 17 August | 11:52

http://www.drainspotting.com/mirror/nhtelegraph-2003-11-26/

http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a1_247a.html

(also was on MeFi)

The kid in me wants to say "so that the Ninja Turtles can throw them like large, heavy, deadly frisbees."

posted by Eideteker 17 August | 11:58

Yes, what IRFH said (the "short answer"). This is an example of an interesting sort of urban folklore, similar to the "glass flows in windows" UL. It came up every now and then when I hung out at alt.folklore.urban. In fact, I might as well Google to demonstrate how often it comes up. (Did you notice that "Groups" was taken off the main alternate search links?)

A frequently mentioned common characteristic of ULs is that they validate a bias. In the case of this type, the bias "I'm more clever than most people". What makes them so interesting, though, is that they're wrong.

To me, this sort of summarizes the human condition.

posted by kmellis 17 August | 12:05

Okay, this is what I wrote on a separate sheet of paper:

First of all, not all manhole covers are round. Some can be square-shaped.

Second, I believe most manhole covers are round because of the simple matter of physics.

See, the easiest way to create a hole is to drill one, using a tool that employs centrifugal motion to propel the boring (as in "drilling," not as in "lacking interest) mechanism into the surface into which the hole is placed. A pointed tube with a raised upwards inclining edge is the perfect tool for this because the inclined upwards edge pushes the detrius created up and out of the hole. This upraised edge acts as a lever, one of the most simple and efficient machines described by physicists. Centrifugal motion inscribes a circle; thus, the opening of th3 hole will be round as opposed to oblong or square. (I also forgot to mention that to get the maximum amount of work out of your boring tool, the more surface area applied to the surface of the tunnel's walls, the better.

As a whole, governments hate to waste money on materialsm and it just makes more sense to cover a round hole with a circle than, say, with a rhombus because the rhombus will have unnecessary hang over of material on a circular opening.

OR--

My answer is 42.

posted by TrishaLynn 17 August | 12:06

In Rome, they're square, and still bear the acronym for "The Senate and People of Rome"
≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by pieisexactlythree 17 August | 12:12

Square holes are above and are the domain of cats.
Round holes are below and are the domain of men.

This is the way of things. It is not our place to question the way, only to seek to live harmoniously within it.

posted by danostuporstar 17 August | 12:17

My final answer is 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592

posted by pieisexactlythree 17 August | 12:27

But, pi... I thought... you were exactly three!

OMG, I sold porn to a 3-year-old!!!

posted by TrishaLynn 17 August | 12:30

*bows to the wisdom of danostuporstar, all-seeing and all-knowing*

but not as all seeing as ceiling cat, of course, for which we are thankful

posted by elizard 17 August | 14:06

This question offends women. The correct term for this item is "access cover", the term "manhole" is sexist and I am reporting you to...

posted by Capn 17 August | 14:48

for which we are thankful

You maybe, but I regret this fact..

posted by danostuporstar 17 August | 15:03

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