MetaChat - Choose your superpowers!

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11 July 2006

Choose your superpowers! →[More:]In honor of the new movie "My Super Ex-Girlfriend", I'd like to ask all of you...what super powers would you choose if you could? For example..I want the sort of telepathy where I can take that monstrous SUV or pickup hugging my bumper and stick them on the side of the road, unable to move for 15 minutes, so I can get to my destination in peace. Ditto for the slow pokes in front of me.

post by: redvixen at: 19:18 | 30 comments

I want Mary Poppins' super cleaning powers; to be able to point at anything and have it march/zoom/roll back to where it belongs.

posted by comments on the world as will 11 July | 19:24

I want Ultimate Empathy - I want the ability to completely calm anyone at anytime. The more someone wants to hate another person, the more that person suddenly gets the urge to have a nice nap.

posted by Lipstick Thespian 11 July | 19:26

Flying would be cool but maybe telekinesis would be a better deal since Phoenix can fly with it as well and she can toss stuff around, that would be fun. Especially in traffic.

posted by fenriq 11 July | 19:35

I'll take what trondant's having.

posted by Wolfdog 11 July | 19:46

*turns crank*

Feh. I already have superpowers.

*hangs freshly-printed counterfil bills to dry*

And they're damn handy, too.

posted by Smart Dalek 11 July | 20:00

Counterfil® Bills. Like MadLibs®, but the denominations are up to you.

posted by Smart Dalek 11 July | 20:03

♫ So I fixed up the basement with
What I was a-workin' with
Stocked it full of jelly jars
And heavy equipment... ♫

posted by Wolfdog 11 July | 20:03

I'll take invisibility and time-stop.

posted by loquacious 11 July | 20:10

the ability to manipulate time. Back and forward and stop. Maybe even with the manoop manoop manoop of a tivo remote.

posted by gaspode 11 July | 20:20

"Attracts foxes" would be OK.

posted by Wolfdog 11 July | 20:27

Pretty much what I said in this AskMe thread. Flight, with necessary extras.
Also being able to become invisible and immaterial at will.

posted by Zack_Replica 11 July | 20:36

Ease suffering. I was going to say "eliminate suffering," but then I thought that might not be for the ultimate good, since suffering is what leads to compassion. But when suffering is extreme in duration or excruciating in intensity, and it's gone beyond challenging a person to exhausting them, it would be great to be able to ease it down a few notches. It would make deaths easier and struggles not quite so hard to bear.

posted by Miko 11 July | 20:36

My super power is stupidity. I can be incredibly obtuse in a single vowel.

posted by eekacat 11 July | 20:42

My super-power is that I can converse with dead people.

posted by getoffmylawn 11 July | 20:54

uhhh

posted by eekacat 11 July | 21:09

Damn. I totally forgot to post my "If you were an X-(wo)man, what mutant powers would you want to have?" post. Meant to do it when the movie came out.

I'd want Archangel's power - flight (if I can pick only one) and invisibility (do any X-people have that?). Kitty Pride's being able to go through walls would be a nice addition.

posted by deborah 11 July | 21:50

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by getoffmylawn 11 July | 21:53

OOPS!!! Sorry, previous posting is NSFW!

posted by getoffmylawn 11 July | 21:55

I used to be an invisible man, but the control-the-flow-of-time folks have gradually won me over.

posted by box 11 July | 22:18

I'd have the power to make people think they're on fire.

posted by goatdog 11 July | 22:30

I gotta go with the Sphere of Influence, a la Twilight in X-Nation 2099. I control reality within a finite distance from my body. A friend of mine once had a character with a similar power; basically self-determination. It was impossible to do anything to him or make him do anything he didn't want.

When I was bored walking on hot summer days to and from work as a non-driving teenager, I used to fantasize about having the ability to Teleport, Line of Sight (or TELOS, which is Greek for goal, get it?). Once a day would be enough.

I can manifest all kinds of superpowers when I lucid dream. The most fun is probably Nightcrawler's teleportation.

posted by Eideteker 11 July | 22:51

I really want the ability to create popular internet memes (Craig Ferguson vs. Tigers!), but lacking that, I'd settle for the Tick's "nigh invulnerability". (I remember the cartoon episode where he was being interviewed about his powers, always answering "nope, nope" until the off-camera voice asked him if he could destroy the world: "I hope not! That's where I keep all my stuff!") And invulnerability PLUS invisibility would be as cool as it is alliterative.

posted by wendell 11 July | 22:54

The ability to point at random people nd have them drop what they are doing and cook for me.

posted by PlanetKyoto 11 July | 23:59

Instant comprehension, or control over others' perceptios of reality, or infinite alcohol tolerance.

posted by casarkos 12 July | 00:20

The power of invisibility is mine. But this is not a super power just a facet of the human condition.

I was leaving a showing of the movie "The Icicle Thief" on a winter night with my wife. I highly recommend the movie- a surreal blend of tv and real life with characters traveling between the two realities. We had to stop on the way out of the parking lot because some people were stuck on the mild but icy rise of the driveway. The three of them were standing outside of their car, talking and scratching their heads. They ignored us when we asked if they needed help. Suggesting that someone get in the car to drive while the rest of us pushed was met with unrelated head scratching and irrelevant conversation. I suggested Sharon get in the car and she did. She drove it out while I pushed. The oblivious three sorted themselves into their car and drove off without ever acknowledging us.
It remains a special moment.

posted by pointilist 12 July | 00:41

I'd take the USA, because then all the other superheroes would come to my aid whenever I was in trouble. I would, of course, suffer from more alien attacks and natural disasters, but these aren't really a problem if you have superheroes to protect you.

Unfortunately, this power could be a bit difficult to control, so maybe I'd take super-storytelling instead. Then I'd be able to bore my enemies to death.

posted by Daniel Charms 12 July | 05:56

The superpower I would most like to have comes to me courtesy of Harper Lee's Atticus Finch:

If you just learn a single trick, Scout, you'll get along a lot better with all kinds of folks. You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... Until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it.

I'd like to be able to make myself do this and others as well. Just sit quietly, off to the side, in someone else's brain and body. I think there would be many "aHA!" moments.

posted by jinxiemalone 12 July | 07:52

You know Wolverine? Like that...except not on my hands.

posted by danostuporstar 12 July | 08:15

Teleport! Duh. Of course. Ease suffering, and teleport. Way to save on gas and plane fare.

posted by Miko 12 July | 09:25

The ability to fix things. Bodies, minds, broken faucets, broken mugs.

Flight would be cool too.

posted by Fuzzbean 12 July | 10:42

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