MetaChat - Prom and virginity

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26 June 2006

Prom and virginity Someone today commented about the prevalence of people losing their virginity on prom night, but I don't think I have a single friend for whom this is true. Is this just a myth perpetuated by TV?

post by: grouse at: 15:13 | 28 comments

By the time prom came around, we'd all either a) already lost it, or b) decided to hold out.

posted by SassHat 26 June | 15:15

Didn't go to prom, because I was gay and we didn't have gay proms back in the 80's. Didn't lose it (to either gender) until college.

posted by matildaben 26 June | 15:18

Actually, I had done neither SassHat. I was actually still cherry when I graduated. I remember sitting there in my cap and gown feeling angry that all those 80's teen sex romp pictures had lied to me. I did manage to get laid in college, but she was someone else's girlfriend unfortunately.

posted by jonmc 26 June | 15:20

I went to my prom with a gay guy.

All the gay guys at my school asked all the seniors with college boyfriends to the prom (only juniors and seniors could go, no outsiders or underclassmen.) We all went out to eat afterward, and had a blast.

This was before anyone was officially out of the closet, but we all knew. Being Southern no one bothered to mention it.

My date wrote me his coming-out letter the next year while I was in college, but I had known he was gay since seventh grade. As did everyone else.

posted by bunnyfire 26 June | 15:23

I got kicked out of school before the prom but I probably would have skipped it anyway. Its an awful lot of work just for a chance to get laid.

I'm sure there were some kids in my class that waited for prom night to "do it".

posted by fenriq 26 June | 15:40

I was already "doin' it". And I dragged my boyfriend kicking and screaming to the senior formal (our school's name for it, I guess in NZ I've only ever heard "formal" or "ball") and had a miserable time. Stupid boyfriend.

posted by gaspode 26 June | 15:47

SassHat: yeah, that's what I figured.

fenriq: do you know who they are or are you just guessing?

I thought prom was fun.

posted by grouse 26 June | 15:49

grouse, just a guess, it was such a long time ago now. I can think of one couple that was waiting, I don't know if prom night was their "go time" but it might have been. Of course, this was back before American Pie ruined prom night.

posted by fenriq 26 June | 15:59

I think the idea of "prom sex" nowadays should probably be right up with that of "terror sex" around 9/11 and "rainbow parties" in the list of sex-related urban legends.

posted by clevershark 26 June | 16:07

actually maybe not "prom sex" itself, but rather "losing one's virginity on prom night".

posted by clevershark 26 June | 16:08

Who could wait til May? Sheesh.

Plus, everyone's parents were so hyper about preventing prom sex, it just wasn't worth the trouble. Much easier to lose it on a random weekday afternoon.

posted by jrossi4r 26 June | 16:12

Beats me. Nobody asked me to the prom (or anywhere else for that matter), and I didn't lose it until I was 21. I know zippo about teenage sex.

posted by JanetLand 26 June | 16:16

I went to my prom with a gay guy.

Heh; me too. And we looked fabulous (he wore a vintage tailcoat, I a Victorian ivory lace tea dress).

Anyway, I had lost my innocence (snicker) the previous summer anyway, and this guy was my closest male friend at the time and really wanted to go. I wouldn't otherwise have attended the prom (it's a regional dialect thing whether you call it "prom" or "the prom," by the way). It was tolerable, but it was more fun going to the beach campfires afterward and then to the diner for breakfast.

At my high school, absolutely no one talked about getting laid at the prom. The focus was not at all on sex, but on drinking. The ideal prom experience, in the eyes of many, was to succeed in being able to get a room at the Ramada on the highway and booze it up all night with 30 people crammed into it. That wasn't my scene, hence the beach campfire.

posted by Miko 26 June | 16:19

What is this "prom" you speak of?

posted by jokeefe 26 June | 16:26

jokeefe: Wikipedia

posted by grouse 26 June | 16:40

My date didn't make a move, oddly enough. We "parked" for awhile in my parents' driveway after the prom (so not romantic), and that was it. In fact, none of my dates in high school "made a move," so to speak. Maybe I gave off some kind of "goody-two-shoes" vibe or something... that, or they knew about the standing hit my father had arranged with his friend Rocko...

posted by Pips 26 June | 16:50

"rainbow parties" in the list of sex-related urban legends.

Don't ruin that for me, dude.

posted by mullacc 26 June | 17:19

I think the only people I knew who were still virgins by prom night were the same people who did end up waiting until they got married.

maybe it dates back to a time when people actually thought the prom was a big deal?

Also... what is a rainbow party?

posted by kellydamnit 26 June | 17:20

rainbow party, if I'm not mistaken, had something to do with the color of different girl's lipsticks, and how many different colors ended up on the...um...boys' "appendages". Of course, these are kids who don't think that oral sex is sex. Thanks, Clinton.

posted by redvixen 26 June | 17:30

Yes, rainbow parties are where each girl wears a different lipstick and the guys complete to see who can get a "rainbow" with the most colours via oral sex. A separate competition is often conducted among the girls to see who can get a ring of lipstick the furthest down someone's dick.

posted by dg 26 June | 18:02

The big problem with that whole "rainbow party" nonsense is that if the girls know what they're doing there's only going to be the one color left on the guy's thingie in the end.

So, whether or not they're even happening at all the details in the rumor are wrong anyway.

posted by clevershark 26 June | 18:06

jrossi4r:

Plus, everyone's parents were so hyper about preventing prom sex, it just wasn't worth the trouble.

I agree. The adults at my high school discussed prom sex so much getting caught would have meant you'd lived up to your own parents' pop culture fantasies. The principal's, too!

posted by halonine 26 June | 18:06

I held out. Until Mrs. Doohickie came along. But she wasn't Mrs. Doohickie yet. That came later. But still.... so far (crosses fingers), she's it.

posted by Doohickie 26 June | 18:33

I spent the night of my prom in a rural jail in the Middle East. I regret nothing.

posted by atrazine 26 June | 22:03

My town's religious authorities didn't want anyone to go to prom because of...dancing.

I didn't bother going. Me and my friends had all lost our virginities around the ages of 15-16.

posted by kmellis 26 June | 22:31

I found out after the fact that someone had been talked out of asking me.

posted by brujita 27 June | 01:15

I spent the night of my prom in a rural jail in the Middle East. I regret nothing.

Well, you probably had better dance partners.

posted by jonmc 27 June | 08:26

grouse, I was joking. :) I was too much of a hippie to go to the prom, with its materialist, soul sucking, plastic squareness, man.

posted by jokeefe 27 June | 20:43

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