MetaChat - Career Opportunites.

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08 May 2006

Career Opportunites.

post by: jonmc at: 08:48 | 20 comments

I know you'll soon be out of work, Jon, but may I respectfully suggest that you might be looking for alternative employment in the wrong place.

posted by essexjan 08 May | 08:50

What? Are you saying I don't have the figure to pull it off? Hmph!

posted by jonmc 08 May | 08:51

I'm sure you have the perfect waist/hip ratio, but it's more about personality.
≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by essexjan 08 May | 08:54

Charming Personality? Check. (My bartender loves me anyway)
Cheerful Disposition? Check. (I'm the most positive motherfucker you will ever meet, goddamit.)
Attractive appearance & posture? Please.
Intelligence & Common Sense? By the takerload.
Pleasant Speaking Voice? Fuck Yeah!
Good References? Lemme get back to ya...

posted by jonmc 08 May | 08:57

You would look cute with long ears and a fuzzy tail...

*hands off Heff*

posted by Pips 08 May | 09:18

Speaking of looks, I finally figured why jonmc looks so...familiar.

Spittin image of an old boyfriend who broke my heart into pulverized specks,back in the seventies. (Aside: NEVER date male ballet dancers. Nuff said.)

And HIS name was John. Freaky.

Can't believe it took me so long to figure it out.

posted by bunnyfire 08 May | 09:27

So you're saying I look like a ballet dancer?

*cries*

posted by jonmc 08 May | 09:30

I have a cousin who's a ballet dancer. He has the most incredible physique, and is amazingly strong.

He likes to tell the story of how his company was touring the north of England a few years ago. After the show, they stopped in a pub for dinner. The locals heard they were ballet dancers and started all the gibes of 'poufs', 'fairies', etc. (Tyneside is pretty un-PC). My cousin and another male dancer shut them up by each lifting one of the barmaids above their heads, using only one hand, and then walking round the bar balancing the barmaids on one arm.

So, next time you're in Antarctica, Jon, and someone calls you a ballet dancer, just pick up the bartender with one hand ...

posted by essexjan 08 May | 09:36

You guys remember the ballet scene in Top Secret?

posted by Hugh Janus 08 May | 09:37

Well, essexjan, these are two of the bartenders at Antarctica. One, I'd rather enjoy trying to lift. The other, not so much.

posted by jonmc 08 May | 09:38

Why lift when you can dandle?

posted by Hugh Janus 08 May | 09:40

Dandle Dave? You first.

posted by jonmc 08 May | 09:41

I bet I can guess which one you'd like to lift. Does he know?

posted by essexjan 08 May | 10:01

Ballet dancers, mmmmmmmmmm. I need one of those.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 08 May | 10:03

Actually I think the dreamy one I'd love to dandle is not pictured, right? I swoon when she brings me a Guinness, and I die when she tells me it's a buy-back.

posted by Hugh Janus 08 May | 10:04

Yeah, my exboyfriend lifted up my college roommate with one hand. Probably the buffest person I've ever dated.

I knew it was over when we went to see the film Superman, and he couldn't shut up about how goodlooking Christopher Reeve was. Since up to that point he had cheated on me with only girls, you can imagine that was a bit jarring.

posted by bunnyfire 08 May | 10:04

Jesus H Christ, jon, in this picture you're a dead ringer for Pee Wee Herman.

posted by essexjan 08 May | 10:05

well, I'm a loner, dottie, a rebel...

posted by jonmc 08 May | 10:08

So, next time you're in Antarctica,
Does it make me sad that I assumed this was an oblique reference to Superman II and his barstop after having his powers returned at the fortress of solitude.

* pumps arms *
* says * "I've been working out."

Weird bunnyfire / Chris Reeves crossover here, but we are talking about different things.

posted by seanyboy 08 May | 10:14

An oblique reference to Superman, or a reference to Superman's obliques?

posted by Hugh Janus 08 May | 10:30

← Enough of cute || NYC bowling at Port Authority? →

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