MetaChat - Are you an automotive bigot?

When I drove, I used to do exactly the same thing, jrossi. I too am an automotive bigot.

posted by gaspode 01 May | 09:55

SUV drivers always leave more space in front of them than other drivers. I'm not sure why... probably because they're on the phone instead of being on the ball about driving. Perhaps because it's frightening to be at the helm of such a boat.

In any case, it makes them ideal to merge in front of :)

The Lexus/Mercedes drivers always want to merge at the last second, riding the shoulder till the final moment where it disappears. Then they get all pissed if you won't let them in. Hahahahaha. I have to stop enjoying this so much.

posted by scarabic 01 May | 10:05

If I pulled up to a Rolls-Royce, I'd occasionaly ask if they had any Grey Poupon, but that's as far as it went.

posted by jonmc 01 May | 10:06

I don't have a car; my equivalent is making drivers wait while I cross the street slooooooooowly if they've been annoying or overly aggressive. And if it's raining I will give you evil evil looks if you think that you, protected underneath a ROOF, need to get home faster than I, probably sans umbrella and with sopping wet toes, do.

But I don't discriminate based on type of car.

posted by occhiblu 01 May | 10:07

I do this, but then again I drive in New York City (and more honestly in Queens and Brooklyn) so to survive I drive in a frothing rage (keeps the adreneline up, you see). I am totally nicer to people who drive little underpowered 4 cylinder city cars like I have and I bluff charge SUV types all the time, bearing in mind that they will crush my shit in the blink of an eye if I let them. If someone shows any kind of manners at all I usually let them in and wave them on with a smile. People who drive fucked up scarred road warrior Olds 88's with the bumper held on with barbed wire and no muffler, I let them in on the assumption that the best part of their day is probably fucking blamming into people and shoving their car across all three lanes of the BQE.

I drive like a maniac, a friendly maniac.

posted by Divine_Wino 01 May | 10:07

Also, yesterday I had a Bloody Mary, garnished with a celery stalk, an olive, a lemon wedge, a lime wedge, a pickled bean of some sort, a hunk of pickled okra, and a shrimp. In fact I had two. I was almost full by the time I was done with them.

posted by jonmc 01 May | 10:09

Also, Hugh Janus, if your reading this, we ordered you your Bellrays ticket.

posted by jonmc 01 May | 10:10

DW you should charge fares and call it the BQE Thrillitude. Just get a carnie ID and you're good to go.

posted by chewatadistance 01 May | 10:12

Vehicles is vehicles. The driver of the little honda could have their share of bad driving habits, while the SUV's driver could be a mechanic test-driving a client's wheels.

Pinning a stereotype upon a motorist isn't going to make anyone a more awage or open-minded driver. If anything, it opens the way for even more exclusivity and exaggeratrion. Calvin pissing/Ugly Kid Joe logo stickers and magnetic ribbons stemmed forth from the "not like Y-O-U" mentality.

posted by Smart Dalek 01 May | 10:14

There's almost nothing more pathetic than passive/aggressive driving. The operation of large, very dangerous machinery is not the place into which you should sublimate your resentments and anger. Unless, of course, your intent is to actually hurt someone.

posted by Ethereal Bligh 01 May | 10:15

SUV drivers always leave more space in front of them than other drivers.

That's largely due to cruise control. I remember test-driving a "loaner" from a friend, and the compensation time from switchoff is far worse than it would be with a Crown Vic or a Riviera. Simple physics, really.

posted by Smart Dalek 01 May | 10:19

Forgot to add: unlike a big luxury car, SUVs have higher ground clearence, making them more ungainly in tight manouvers. Big luxes alone are a handfull in preventing oversteer, but the sway factor for a van, pickup, etc. is increased.

posted by Smart Dalek 01 May | 10:23

Yes, jrossi, I do the same thing. The only SUVs I give way to are the ones driven by the Forest Rangers around here. Also, don't expect me to give you an inch if you are driving a Beemer, Merc, Lexus, Porsche or in fact anything that costs more than I earn in a year. Or anything with a personalised plate. Or a convertible. Or if you're playing music so loud that it makes my ears hurt.

posted by essexjan 01 May | 10:28

So the Kiwis and Brits discriminate, too. It's not just an ugly American thing. Good to know.

Calvin pissing/Ugly Kid Joe logo stickers and magnetic ribbons stemmed forth from the "not like Y-O-U" mentality.

My BIL is a mechanic. His favorite complaint is a "funny noise" from a car with lots of stuff on it because it's usually easy money. He charges $85 to tell people that the weird flapping sound is coming from the flag attached to their roof. It happens more often than you'd think.

posted by jrossi4r 01 May | 10:35

Driving my first car, a BMW 2002, in the middle of the night up to cape cod with a ton of stuff tied to the roof I got a flat tire. I had never changed one on this thing and didn't even know where the jack was.

As soon as I went to the shoulder some guy pulled over behind me, got out and proceeded to change the tire for me. When he left I said to my passenger "wow, that was nice of him, how strange."

She said "goofball, didn't you notice that he was driving a 2002?"

posted by StickyCarpet 01 May | 10:35

I don't care what you drive, just remember my blind spot is in the same place as yours. Stay out of it.

Just because I neither drive nor own a license doesn't mean that isn't the most important driving tip you heard today, because you probably forget and drive in people's blind spots all the time. Most drivers do.

It's dangerous as hell. Cut it out.

And as far as SUV owners are concerned, I get my laughs while they're going broke at the pump.

posted by Hugh Janus 01 May | 10:41

kmellis
I don't think you get it. On average I would say that 60% of the people driving in cars are not paying attention and counting on the other 40% of people to keep things safe. The ultimate in passive/agressive driving is to be flying along in a 2 ton truck and talking on the phone and not giving a shit about the other people on the road. This pisses me off to no end. I don't care what people drive, I just want them to fucking drive with care and a mote of respect.

And Smart Dalek if an SUV is being driven well then I assume it is a mechanic test driving it or something similar.

SUV's are marketed and sold based on extensive profiling of the types of people who would want an SUV (me I love a good, fast, responsive car, I love driving, I'm good at it, I pay attention and treat it with all the respect and awe that pushing that much metal around at speed deserves,I don't want a fucking V8 milk truck). The thing about some stereotypes (especially as flags of behavior, like I bought this giant car and now I am going to drive like a negligent ass) is that they are good advance warning for what you can expect from the stereotypee. Of course there are exceptions and I'm sure there are plenty of people who drive SUV's that are responsible drivers, they're a small percentage of what I see daily though.

Fuckit anyway, I drive a subway car to work.

posted by Divine_Wino 01 May | 10:43

As a bicyclist, I hate, fear, and distrust all cars.

posted by interrobang 01 May | 10:46

If I'm driving and a little Honda needs to get into the line of traffic, I gladly let them join our merry band of fellow travellers. But if, say, a Lexus SUV wants in? Well, enjoy your luxury interior, fancy pants, because you can wait. And if I don't like your bumper stickers you're TOTALLY screwed.

YES.

But if the Lexus or whatever is polite and signals with plenty of room, I let him in, 'cuz I don't want to turn into one of the assholes myself.

If it's at the last minute, he is, as you said, screwed. If he (or anyone, but especially a car I don't like) whizzed, in the left lane, past a whole line of traffic waiting in the right lane, then he wants to get into the right lane for a freeway ramp or somesuch, SCREW 'IM even more. Wait your turn like the rest of us, asshole.

posted by shane 01 May | 10:47

I do not treat drivers differently based upon their cars. Then again, I have no problem with SUVs, sports cars, etc. Perhaps it would be different if I lived in some huge city but people actually use their SUVs and full-size trucks here. If I had the money I would pick up one just for storm chasing. As is, I don't ever go chasing because the gas/food/lodging adds up too fast.

posted by weretable and the undead chairs 01 May | 10:48

I drive a Jeep. I'm out in the middle of nowheresville and it comes in handy in the snow, gets pretty damn good gas mileage too. It's pretty small, actually, but I guess I get lumped in with SUV drivers and so now you all hate me. *sniff*

(I've pulled a BMW and a VW out of snow and have rescued many a friend whose car couldn't get them to work in the snow...heh)

I don't discriminate about letting people in or anything, but if tons of us are waiting in a long, merging line to get somewhere, and some asshole comes barreling in to elbow in to the front of the line, no way am I letting him/her in - I don't give a damn what you're driving. Also, I find that cell phone talkers are much bigger assholes than SUV drivers.

posted by iconomy 01 May | 11:02

I don't give a damn what you're driving. Also, I find that cell phone talkers are much bigger assholes than SUV drivers.

Seriously, around here as far as I know you cannot even put an SUV into drive if you don't have a cell clapped to your ear.

I would like to re-explain, because I like you folks, that I don't defacto think that people who drive SUV's are bad and I can think of several reasons WHY having a larger
car/truck would be required especially if you live in places where weather and or location make it a good idea. BUT the bulk of SUV drivers around me, suck ass. That is the metric right there, 75 - 80% are selfish pricks. If that is not you then you will never feel my scorn, I might still cackle when you pay 8 million dollars at the gas station. I love cars, I'm going to miss all those great, fast, cool ones when we all either ride a mutant donkey to the slime mines or an electric computer coltrolled one to the Ministry of Love.

posted by Divine_Wino 01 May | 11:12

My nephew told me his Super Bentley had "luxurious interior appointments" and a roll bar.

posted by Hugh Janus 01 May | 11:26

The ones to watch out for are the Conestoga drivers. It's tough to see around and the dame oxen are noisy. Lousy menaces.

posted by jonmc 01 May | 11:26

As a rule, I try not to let SUV drivers in front of me but thats based purely on the fact that they block my view of the road in front of them. On curvy hill roads, knowing what's happening 5-6 car lengths ahead is critical.

Personally, I think that anyone who gets a feeling of superiority based on what kind of car they drive, be it in terms of cost, power or fuel efficiency, needs to get a grip. If the guy driving the Hummer is Hitler, the guy driving the Prius is still a guard at Auschwitz, who was only following orders. When it comes to allowing ourselves to be addicted to petroleum, we're all guilty. It's just a matter of degree.

posted by doctor_negative 01 May | 11:27

Hitler rode a bicycle.

posted by Divine_Wino 01 May | 11:30

Oh man, jonmc, you'd love Cairo traffic, all these donkey carts running with the cabs and vans, huffing and puffing, braying, "feets don't fail me now!"

posted by Hugh Janus 01 May | 11:31

Absolutely not all SUV drivers are terrible people. Just the ones that never leave the inside of their large city. The most ridiculous car thing I've seen is a Hummer parked on 12th St. in Manhattan.

posted by gaspode 01 May | 11:34

When it comes to allowing ourselves to be addicted to petroleum, we're all guilty. It's just a matter of degree.

Matchbox cars are a gateway drug! Just say no to Hotwheels!

posted by Divine_Wino 01 May | 11:37

My nephew also told me about his "bubble car," which got great gas mileage, had independent suspension and anti-lock brakes, and deluxe hand-cranked windows, though he can't quite get it to drift around corners like the Bentley does.

posted by Hugh Janus 01 May | 11:46

We've got a building firm out here that actually issues Hummers as their company cars. At coffee break and lunch time, the local WaWa looks like a dealership.

My SUV hatred is not absolute. It's mostly the luxury variety that give me the meanies. No one is taking their Mercedes off-roading. Jeeps get a pass, ico. Especially if they're driven by cute redheads.

How does your family feel about arranged marriage, Hugh? Your nephew and my girly would make a lovely future couple.

posted by jrossi4r 01 May | 11:48

Hand Cranked is the way of the future.

I once rode in a model A Ford, it was awesome. My godson at his cuteness zenith called all cars "Trutssss!"

posted by Divine_Wino 01 May | 11:49

Arranged marriage makes the baby Gandhi cry. But if she picked him up in a Bentley, he'd be unable to resist.

Well, he'd be unable to resist telling her what a nice touring car she had, and how versatile it is.

At three, he's already received a job offer from Tony the mechanic, after he pointed out that Tony's Dodge Dart Swinger was almost the same car as a Plymouth Valiant.

posted by Hugh Janus 01 May | 12:03

Hugh,
Someone should be selecting and reading things from hooptyrides to the boy, if only because so few of us get to see what may well be our future selves. (this is both a compliment to your neph and Mr. Jalopy, btw).

posted by Divine_Wino 01 May | 12:06

Check out High and Mighty (the nonfiction book, not the John Wayne movie or the rap duo) for more information about SUV marketing/profiling/whatnot. Funny, funny, infuriating stuff.

posted by box 01 May | 12:08

SUV drivers always leave more space in front of them than other drivers.

Not in NJ.

And as far as SUV owners are concerned, I get my laughs while they're going broke at the pump.

$14 for a full tank yesterday. At $3.03/gal.

I don't base my reaction on the car; I base it on the behavior. If I see someone in a nice car who obviously appreciates driving, then they are my brother (my richer brother). Someone who doesn't pay attention, doesn't signal, and takes unnecessary risks (as opposed to purely fun ones) is an ass and gets no quarter. Of course, I'm less assertive on my motorcycle (I can slip past people but don't take them head on). When I'm in my F-150, though? Fuck your puny car! HA HA HA! (I only fill the F-150 up about once every three months, for the curious. $75/tank = boo.)

ON PREVIEW:Wino, I think I saw one of those yesterday. Nicely restored, but top speed was about 40 mph. I waved as I passed, though.

Hugh: You nephew sounds like my dad. He could identify just about any car from a very young age.

posted by Eideteker 01 May | 12:09

I just forwarded that to my brother, Divine_Wino. I'm sure his education will begin right after his nap.

Yeah, Eideteker; just before he turned three, he pointed out a parked new Acura TL to his mom. Then he pointed out last year's model driving by. Mouths of babes.

posted by Hugh Janus 01 May | 12:16

Hmmm...well she's really more into construction equipment than luxury sedans, Hugh. If he can't tell a backhoe from a trackhoe, he probably deserves a girl with more champagne tastes.

posted by jrossi4r 01 May | 12:28

I like to wave and point at tinted limo windows, in case they're doing anything naughty.

posted by Pips 01 May | 12:28

He's into pickup trucks, and drops construction payloads into 'em all the time, just like the commercials. And he digs John Deeres, if his county fair visits are any gauge.

Hizzoner Mayor-For-Life Marion Barry's limo once passed us on the right, going about 90 mph. I just assumed he was doing something naughty, so I didn't bother to wave and point.

posted by Hugh Janus 01 May | 12:48

I am reminded of the small child in the car who once pointed out the "dumfuks". "Dumfuk, dumfuk," he would say.

They were dumptrucks.

posted by sarah connor 01 May | 13:39

but if tons of us are waiting in a long, merging line to get somewhere, and some asshole comes barreling in to elbow in to the front of the line, no way am I letting him/her in
You would be amazed at the lengths I will go to to stop these people getting in - I watch them zoom past in the breakdown lane and memorise the cars in case I get a chance to cut them off from re-entering the traffic lanes further along. Lots of people in my previous regular commute used to to it - almost to the point of ganging up on people trying to junp the queue.

posted by dg 02 May | 07:53

dg, imagine my chagrin that I'm now occasionally a passenger in cars that do this (some asshole comes barreling in), because in Greece, this isn't really a big deal - since if you ever hope to get your share in anything at all you're expected to push and shove and elbow your way in everything... plus Greek drivers are THE WORST, much as I love the Greek people otherwise. Really, the car horror that I have here is such that I would be totally happy never to ride in another auto again.

posted by taz 02 May | 08:38

01 May 2006