MetaChat - I just watched The Devil's Rejects...

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21 April 2006

I just watched The Devil's Rejects... →[More:]and I have gotta say, that that is one of the worst movies I have ever seen in my life.

SPOILER

Do you realize that the end of that movie involves watching the main characters sitting parked in front of a roadblock for literally 5 whole minutes because that's how long the slow part at the beginning of the long version of freebird takes to get to the guitar solo? Then they get shot by cops in slow motion to the guitar solo from freebird. Lord, I wish I were kidding.

END SPOILER.

that said, what's the worst movie YOU'VE ever seen? and campy hysterically bad ones don't count. I'm talking unwatchably bad, no redeeming value whatsoever.

post by: shmegegge at: 04:21 | 23 comments

I couldn't stand Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy — awful, awful dreck.

posted by AlexReynolds 21 April | 04:25

Charlie's Angels. Ugh. Mind numblingly boring.

posted by flopsy 21 April | 05:01

The Mummy Returns or Tarkovsky's The Sacrifice. I walked out of neither but I really wished I'd walked out of both.

posted by oh pollo! 21 April | 05:37

I liked Kevin Smith's films up until I went to see Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Now that is an irredemably awful film. It's like watching Kevin Smith suck his own cock for two hours - and about as attractive as that sounds.

Is there any point mentioning the later Matrix films or the later Star Wars films? It doesn't help that all these films have dialogue that, to my ears, sounds like a monkey beating the shit out of a filing cabinet and action scenes that are really, really boring. Boring action scenes in what are primarily action movies - that can't be right can it?

posted by dodgygeezer 21 April | 06:31

Any Batman movie. I walked out of 2.

posted by chewatadistance 21 April | 06:51

Whoa there. For me Batman Begins was one of the best films of last year. And I like the Adam West one too, but that might just be me.

As for the others, I couldn't agree more.

posted by dodgygeezer 21 April | 07:17

One person's irredeemably bad is another's campy hysterically bad. In the former category, maybe Year of the Comet (irredeemably bad movies, in my experience, are almost always products of the studio system. Even the worst indie film or documentary is often kind of charmingly inept, like twee-pop). In the latter, Cannonball Run II. Straddling the two, Never Too Young To Die.

posted by box 21 April | 07:17

The Talented Mister Ripley. I hated every minute of it.

posted by mike9322 21 April | 07:24

A couple of years ago I posted to MeFi about Zardoz: I've yet to find another film that has its particular kind of badness, though I've looked high and low. (The Chronicles of Riddick comes close, though.)

Torque is an astonishingly bad film, in the completely unredeemable way that the OP's looking for.

posted by Prospero 21 April | 07:46

Queen of the Damned was really bad.

I tried to go to a screening of The Devil's Rejects before it came out. It had been publicized to people in movies and some unknown group, but no industry people showed up. Only scary, unshowered and unshaven, strung-out looking people. I left!

posted by halonine 21 April | 08:26

No Retreat, No Surrender. A mind numbingly stupid film about kickboxing, a sport that can usually guarantee at least a few good fight scenes, but no dice. Docked extra points for soiling Springsteen.

posted by jonmc 21 April | 08:29

I walked out of the excruciating Interview with a Vampire. Dull and shitty.

posted by Hugh Janus 21 April | 08:32

Oh, and don't get me started on Highlander.

posted by Hugh Janus 21 April | 08:33

I agree Interview with a Vampire is bad, but I can watch it with a straight face. Queen of the Damned was several times worse and I laughed through it all, that's how bad it is. Granted if you would like to see a comedy, it's a good comedy.

posted by halonine 21 April | 08:37

Jurassic Park and Dusk 'til Dawn are the ones that I remember making me actively angry at the existence of movies.

Most other movies just suck passively.

posted by Wolfdog 21 April | 08:40

50 First Dates is one of my least-favorite movies ever. I liked Devil's Rejects about a hundred times better. Maybe two hundred.

Armageddon. I was entertained for a total of maybe 2 minutes during this movie.

I'd nominate Pearl Harbor but I didn't watch it. Same goes for Sister Act 2: Back In The Habit.

posted by agropyron 21 April | 09:09

Despite the 100% on the Tomatometer, I hate Landscape In The Mist

posted by YouCanCallMeAl 21 April | 09:12

Oh yeah, I really hate bad romantic comedies - and since that's about the only movie that gets made in Britain these days you can just imagine how pleased I am about that.

posted by dodgygeezer 21 April | 09:23

I hear ya dodge. We recently watched the Committments, which I thought sucked.

posted by chewatadistance 21 April | 09:40

Corky Romano, Star Wars: Episode I, Mister Frost, Head Above Water and any of Rob Zombie's movies. I love Zardoz.

posted by arse_hat 21 April | 10:20

Remake of Herbie the Love Bug really sucked.

posted by sarah connor 21 April | 10:30

Derek Jarman's Blue and Jubilee: I know a lot of people think he's amazing, but I found both of these films deeply irritating.

Serendipity: two loathsome selfish monsters of failed humanity are not fit subjects for an enjoyable romantic comedy.

The remake of Sabrina: holy shit, you have to say the lines right to make this stuff work. It requires a mannered performance, not some method actor shit. Witty quips and staccato tough guy talk do not come from an emotional memory of your favorite puppy dying, Harrison. Wretched.

Van Sant's Gerry: sometimes slow and wandering makes for incredible film (Stalker for example, or Deadman). Sometimes it's just intensely dull.

posted by PinkStainlessTail 21 April | 11:00

man, now my netflix queue is filled to bursting! thanks, all!

posted by shmegegge 21 April | 12:54

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