MetaChat - Ask MeCha: Can I get roofies on drugstore.com?

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28 March 2006

Ask MeCha: Can I get roofies on drugstore.com? I have a date on Saturday. With a woman.→[More:]Just kidding about the roofie thing. (As far as you know.)

post by: mike9322 at: 07:53 | 43 comments

wonders ignorantly wtf are roofies...?

posted by chewatadistance 28 March | 07:58

Ha, chewie, it's a little something you slip in your date's drink to make her more, um, agreeable. And it was totally a joke. :)

The real news here is: date! With a woman!

posted by mike9322 28 March | 08:00

But are you kidding about the date thing? Knock 'em dead! But not that dead.

posted by TrishaLynn 28 March | 08:05

The people who were in IRC last night know this story already, but I pretty much have amberglow to thank for this. He told me a few weeks back that I looked like Matthew McConaughey in a certain picture. I'm aware enough to know that he is a decent looking fellow, so I took this as a pretty big compliment. I put the picture up on Match this week and revised my profile a bit, and suddenly I am getting winks and emails like never before. Crazy. I owe you a drink or three, amberglow!

posted by mike9322 28 March | 08:11

Congratulations, mike! I hope it goes well.

posted by sciurus 28 March | 08:17

congrats mike!

posted by shane 28 March | 08:19

So this queer eye for the straight guy thing actually works then. Crikey.

posted by dodgygeezer 28 March | 08:22

Oh, you mean Forget-Me-Nows?

/Gob

posted by Rhomboid 28 March | 08:23

Thanks for the edumacation, mike. I was thinking, diaphragms?? huh?

and good luck with the dating extravaganza!

posted by chewatadistance 28 March | 08:52

Yaaaaaaaay amberglow, it really is your week!

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 28 March | 09:24

congratulations again, you sly dog! See, you don't need rohypnol to attract the ladies, just your movie-star self!

posted by rebirtha 28 March | 09:38

*fights off paparazzi*

posted by mike9322 28 March | 09:41

well now i want this picture. i may have to see a guy later and i want to impress him.

posted by ethylene 28 March | 09:59

Make sure to get your smooch on, dawg!

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 28 March | 10:08

amberglow, I want a complete life makeover consultation before your golden week is over, ok?

posted by agropyron 28 March | 10:08

oh, and congrats mike!

posted by agropyron 28 March | 10:09

pink, I'm going to need you to speak into my earpiece and tell me all the right things to say, to ensure my getting my smooch on. And then, later, it will turn out that the person who she actually fell in love with was you all along, and you two will eventually figure out the truth, and get together in the end.

On second thought, maybe I'll try to figure this out on my own.

posted by mike9322 28 March | 10:12

She has the same name as my ex, except it ends with an 'e' instead of an 'a'. I hope this doesn't freak me out.

posted by mike9322 28 March | 10:15

Hahaha, like "Roxanne" with Steve Martin, right? (Great movie!) I'm gonna leave you to do it on your own, though, because I know you can do it.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 28 March | 10:18

Mike...you're not gonna need roofies. ;)

posted by Miko 28 March | 10:19

Yep, Roxanne. Heh. Is that your nose, or did a bus park on your face?

posted by mike9322 28 March | 10:22

*crosses mike off list of vegas hook ups*

posted by ethylene 28 March | 10:22

The trick is to not worry about it. And don't talk to her chest. You'll do fine.

posted by cmonkey 28 March | 10:25

Well, I'm not married to her yet, eth. :) I haven't even seen if her pictures are accurate - it could be a disaster. And I've had disasters. Oy. I'm not sure what people expect to accomplish by posting pictures that were obviously taken 8 years and 80 pounds ago.

posted by mike9322 28 March | 10:26

it really is my week--i'm on a roll! : >

go get em, mike--but no naked bongo playing til you know them better, ok?

agro--anytime (This week prob, since i'm 3 for 3)

posted by amberglow 28 March | 10:29

Thanks everyone for the encouragement. I admit I'm being a little self-deprecating, because it's fun. I actually do okay at this kind of thing. It has been a long, long time (geez, over 6 years now), but I'm actually a lot more mature and confident with myself than I was when I was dating in college and up to the woman I eventually married. The hardest part for me is in the inital approach, and the online thing has taken that obstacle out of the way. Once I'm interacting with someone, I am comfortable and charming. Looking forward to getting out there again.

posted by mike9322 28 March | 10:32

do me, amber-- sounds dirty.
mike, i'll have to see your bloodwork first.

posted by ethylene 28 March | 10:32

wait, i almost forgot i was the virgin queen of metachat.

just leave gifts at the hem of my robes.

posted by ethylene 28 March | 10:34

If it's any help, I think you look kind of like Matthew Mcwhatever too.

posted by matildaben 28 March | 10:42

Good luck! Keep us posted...

posted by go dog go 28 March | 11:01

i have to go groom this off now

posted by ethylene 28 March | 11:02

Yay, date!

Am green with envy. Of both the girl and your date-making.

posted by Specklet 28 March | 11:44

Specklet, sweetie, you know you'd be the one if it wasn't for geography. Alas, I'll have to settle for the second-rate women of Virginia Beach.

posted by mike9322 28 March | 11:47

Uh, second-rate? Missy Fucking Misdemeanor Goddamn Elliott is from Virginia Beach.

I mean, I understand how all women come in second to the lovely Specklet, but

Down South girls got them real big butts,
Real big butts make ya man wanna look,
Back it up, flip it up, skinny girls ICK!
Love my gut so fuck a tummy tuck, OH YEAH!
Yup, i shakes my butt, shakes my gut like 'yeah bitch, what?'
Yeah i likes it rough, tough ask ya man how i'm good in handcuffs,
Me and Nelly came to rock the club, pack the place, don't push and shove,
I'm from the club straight to the crub, i'll let ya know if the sex was good.
...
DOWN SOUTH PLAYAS, WE GOT THAT FIRE, MAYNE!
Get up on my booty, tootie fruite on the rudy
I'm a thick chick, skinny girls act snooty,
No matter what the size, my big thighs, i do my duty,
Look at the way my rump like shake like a movie
See my tight jeans and the coochie,
spend a little loochie, gotta work for the booty,
Me and Nelly hot on the track, Nelly, can't no one ever top that,
Cuz we came to rock the club, DJ's betta pump it up,
Muthafuckas need to back it up, cuz we gon' tear the roof off the club...

I'm just sayin', yo; again I'm not arguing that Specklet is anything but the One True Goddess, but damn! Virginia Beach got it goin' on.

Trust Nelly -- I've heard tell he has a Go-Go Gadget dick.

posted by Hugh Janus 28 March | 12:11

Thanks for reminding me, Hugh! I'll give her a call.

posted by mike9322 28 March | 12:14

I mean, I understand how all women come in second to the lovely Specklet

again I'm not arguing that Specklet is anything but the One True Goddess

Specklet, you know I've always thought very highly of you, but I think I liked you better as a mere mortal. One True Goddesses are a tad high maintenance and make such poor friends. A shame, that.

Mike, way to go and have a great time!

posted by Frisbee Girl 28 March | 12:27

And here I was thinking I'd invented the "Go-go Gadget Penis!" joke...

One True Goddess? Yesssss!

On preview, Fris, if you think I should be mortal, I will give up my technical goddess status so's to be less high-maintenance. Then we can be mortal goddesses that make excellent friends together.

posted by Specklet 28 March | 12:32

Okay, how about Two True Major Mortal Deities?

Now I'm daydreaming about both of you poolside, shaking asses in a rap video, surrounded by Down South Playaz, who lift you both up into the air, asses still shaking, and kowtow to your magnificences as Nelly growls into the mic.

Then serving trays are brought out and everybody feasts on Specklet's South American Stew with Cornmeal Dumplings as the Cristal flows into the night and the party starts for real.

posted by Hugh Janus 28 March | 12:50

What is this "marriage" thing people keep talking about?

posted by deadcowdan 28 March | 13:17

i dunno but i just heard of another "divorce" thing.
there's a plague on.

posted by ethylene 28 March | 13:19

So this queer eye for the straight guy thing actually works then. Crikey.

I LOL'd. :^)

posted by deborah 28 March | 14:21

What is this "marriage" thing people keep talking about?

I think that is supposed to come after that hypothetical "date" thing I keep hearing about. I am sure that neither exist and are elaborate fictions created by the Military Industrial Greeting Card Complex.

posted by King of Prontopia 28 March | 15:45

Hugh & Specklet, you guys are too sweet. Thanks, but I prefer my regular Frisbee-ness to any kind of pesky goddess status. But I'm happy to frolic about the pool any old time.

posted by Frisbee Girl 30 March | 14:38

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