This post is dedicated to those who've lost someone recently (you know who you are), and to those who still feel the loss of someone dear to them.

Nice, and true. Will do eideteker!

There's so many people in the rear veiw mirror at this point, that I wouldn't know where to begin. All the people we used to know, they're an illusion to me now...

More than one person is okay. Phone calls are also okay. Falling out of touch is not okay.

Use your illusion, jon.

Excellent idea , Eideteker!

There's no real need to rule out anyone on MeCha, though, just share it privately and directly so others don't feel excluded, you know?

But, yesterday's got nothin' for me...

Done.

Thank you.

When I was in the Bay Area last weekend, I thought about two people that I knew well there (in the late 80's/early 90's) that I have fallen out of touch with (the other two major people from that time of my life, I have emailed recently for other reasons). I just found one of them on her university's directory page, and dropped her a short but fond email. The other may be living out of the country, so will require more sleuthing.

Thanks for the push.

I did this yesterday to a long-lost friend. We're getting together soon. Yay.

There's no real need to rule out anyone on MeCha, though, just share it privately and directly so others don't feel excluded, you know?

I don't know. I have a hard time seeing how this will not now make people feel excluded. But if you're in touch with your whole family and all of your dear old friends, don't let me stop you.

Life is too short for people to not know how you feel about them

That is so, so true.

It's a comfort to me that the last words I spoke f2f to my boyfriend, George, when we last saw each other on 7 July were "I love you". Although we said it to each other many, many times after that on the phone and in email, I had no idea at the time that I would never say those words to him in person ever again.

When I was flying out to the US for George's funeral, on the Chicago-Columbus flight I was seated next to a really nice guy, on his way home after working away for a week. He had a lovely wife and three children, showed me their pictures. I told him about George, and urged him never to forget to tell his wife he loved her. As I waited for my suitcase, he was standing near me and I caught his eye as he dialled his cellphone and heard him telling his wife and each of his three boys how much he loved them. After he hung up, he said to me "my wife thinks I've gone crazy, but when I get home I'll tell her your story."

essexjan, I just got a little choked up. That's great that the man took what you said to heart.

Great story, EJ. A good example of how the ripples of our actions expand outward to the edges of the great human lake. Or some such analogy.

I may do some contacting tonight. What I really need to do, though, is not reach out to someone I haven't talked to in a long time -- I'm pretty good at keeping in touch -- but to mend fences with two people who, years ago, I decided to cut off. These were two different people at two different times who I decided were having a negative impact in my life, and I just withdrew. Now I want to let them know I'm sorry for not handling it better or more graciously, that now I know it was me and not them. Just make peace, resolve.

essexjan, you made me cry. *hug*

And eideteker is so, so right.

You threaten my job and my marriage with your friendly scheme.

Wow, that just undid me, ej. In going over the legal details of my mother's final hours, she has expressly asked and with my blessing, not to be seen by anyone at the end. A part of me withers inside every time I think about it, but this is what she wants. Needless to say, we tell each other that we love each other a LOT.

So much sorrow here and rightly so, this is a solemn thread. How you do contact someone you've cut out (my story is much like Miko's) that is ultra-private? I have no idea what his phone number or email is or where to even find it.

LF: Zaba Search helped me track a few people down. Though, if the person you're looking for is unlisted, it won't find him/her. The last address it has for me is 4 years old.

Thanks mike but I don't think it works for Canadians. I guess I'll just have to hope he looks me up or we run into each other serendipitously.

mike, zaba search has my current address (which has been current for 6 years), and i have an unlisted phone number (which it doesn't have). still, scary. i didn't think i could be found that easily.

Zaba says that my dad lived at my old address (he didn't) and that my cousin's parents live with him (they don't). It also doesn't list the address I've lived at for almost three years now. So, I am still mysterious and untrackable.