MetaChat - I can't make up my mind about this.

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09 March 2006

I can't make up my mind about this. On the one hand: wow! On the other hand: shame! On the third hand: heights!

post by: danostuporstar at: 12:58 | 41 comments

No. No. No.

::hides in corner, feels floor and walls around me, feels safe::

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 09 March | 13:00

My wife would freak. Can't handle heights at all.

But yeah, Ed Abbey would have some choice words here.

posted by tr33hggr 09 March | 13:01

Having hiked the canyon, I'd totally hit this.

posted by WolfDaddy 09 March | 13:10

Clicks, freaks, closes tab.

posted by matildaben 09 March | 13:16

Heights are a new phobia for me, so I often forget I have it until it's too late. I can see myself getting halfway out on that thing and having a nervous breakdown.

posted by jrossi4r 09 March | 13:19

I'd do it.

posted by taz 09 March | 13:20

Also, I'd take a photo and post it here, and make matildaben and TPS cry.

posted by taz 09 March | 13:21

EEEEEEEEK!

*clings to TPS in the corner*

posted by TrishaLynn 09 March | 13:22

Oh, man! I think I would love this.

posted by wimpdork 09 March | 13:33

"Wet cleanup on Loop 1... Wet cleanup on Loop 1..."

posted by Triode 09 March | 13:35

Nearly exactly my feelings, dano. It'd be hella cool, but the environmental/purity factor...

I think my idealized version would be stained wood (and maybe glass - kinda like the Forestry building at UBC) instead of steel, concrete, & glass. Even cooler would be something grown (like a ginormous bonzai) at the location instead of built.

posted by porpoise 09 March | 13:36

I kept trying to force myself to read the article so I could form a cogent opinion, but my heart is just racing too fast and my stomach feels funny and I had to close the window because there were BIRDS flying UNDER the deck.

posted by occhiblu 09 March | 13:37

A 4,000-foot bonsai?

posted by occhiblu 09 March | 13:38

Glass is fairly easy to hose off. And I'm thinking the "pre-moistened towelette" concession might be worth investing in.

posted by tommasz 09 March | 13:39

I'd do it. Looks fantastic!

posted by essexjan 09 March | 13:40

My tough part is: How did they build it?

I would be tied off to three separate things before I went out over the edge to put on the railing, for instance.

posted by sarah connor 09 March | 13:48

I know the Canyon is already well past being untouched by "progress," but this is still worth a read.

posted by tr33hggr 09 March | 13:54

I'm there.

posted by Eideteker 09 March | 14:01

...even for those people who opt to remain on all fours.

Hahahaha! I could see me doing that. But I'd give it a try.

posted by deborah 09 March | 14:16

I had a hard enough time standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon, using every cell in my body to fight the powerful vacuum that was trying to suck me into the chasm.

That said, I do have a tendency to try and force myself into challenging my fears. So I'd probably make a big, half-hour production out of shuffling my way to the center of it, then rushing back off, enjoying a kickin' adrenaline high for the rest of the afternoon.

posted by Miko 09 March | 14:45

Fear of heights aside, that's just seven different kinds of wrong. If you can't get an idea of how high up you are from looking over the side, you should probably just never leave the city. When do they start work on the mall?

posted by bmarkey 09 March | 14:50

i think i would shit my pants.

posted by flopsy 09 March | 14:55

What, they were too wimpy to install a tightrope instead?

posted by chewatadistance 09 March | 14:56

Are skateboards allowed? No!? Damn it.

How much for a bungie drop off the end? Do you think we can calculate the proper length of bungie so I can grab a handful of pebbles off of the canyon floor or dunk my head in the Colorado?

I think it's a cool idea, and a better way for Native Americans to generate income from what little property they've been "given" when compared to, say, gambling, or cheap cigs, or worse.

I think that the idea of having an extreme experience in conjunction with learning and the inevitable self-inspection and reflection that these sorts of experiences bring is also a really good idea.

Go through the musueum. Walk out on ledge o' death. Shit pants. Remember it forever.

It's in the same vein as a lot of things, going from a sweat lodge or sauna into icy cold water, sun-diving, sun-dancing (or flesh-hook suspensions) and many more. When you confront your fears, you confront yourself, and in the process learn about yourself.

Am I reading too much into it, and hoping for too much from an expensive tourist trap, hoping for too much from masses of undoubtably sodden-brained tourists?

A bit, but at the least small elements of the experience as indicated above will bore through to even the foggiest tourist. I'm pretty sure that's part of the plan.

Consider that if one fell from such a height, one would have about fifty-two seconds– almost a full minute– to enjoy the Grand Canyon's incredible scenery before impact.

Righteous. At least now I know where to jump if I find myself in the unbearable end-stages of a terminal disease.

posted by loquacious 09 March | 15:01

When do they start work on the mall?

Yeah, really. Twenty-five fucking dollars for a (very intense) three minute walk?

posted by Specklet 09 March | 15:09

Looking back over this, I want to stress that my previous comment was not directed at miko; rather, it was pointed at the very idea of such a construction.

*Nice one, dumbass. Must learn to write clearly.*

posted by bmarkey 09 March | 15:18

I thought your meaning was clear bmarkey.

posted by danostuporstar 09 March | 15:20

Ah, but note the outdoor tables with pretty umbrellas. If they serve drinks, it would be a good place to slurp down some booze and watch people lose it on the loop.

posted by warbaby 09 March | 16:06

i think i would shit my pants.

I think I just shit my pants, too.

*checks*

Yup.

posted by Hugh Janus 09 March | 16:39

Hugh, that's exactly why the pre-moistened towelette concession is going to make big money.

posted by tommasz 09 March | 16:49

Any chance you can bring that concession up to my office, right away?

posted by Hugh Janus 09 March | 16:51

I would so do that.

posted by sisterhavana 09 March | 16:57

I have to admit the experience would rock, but I don't like the precedent of building tourist stuff ON the canyon like that.

I've walked out on top of Angel's Window on the north rim, which has a narrow-ish bit of land connecting it to the side of the canyon, and there were people on all fours just doing THAT, despite the chin-high chain link fence all around. I can imagine people losing it if it was 4,000 feet high and see-thru.

posted by BoringPostcards 09 March | 16:59

I have to admit the experience would rock, but I don't like the precedent of building tourist stuff ON the canyon like that.

YES! What he said!

posted by Eideteker 09 March | 17:04

The more I think about this, the more it bugs me. I'm not what you'd call a spiritual guy, but this whole scheme reeks of desecration. It's like putting a Starbuck's in the nave at Chartres. Just fucking enjoy the beauty and leave Disneyland in Anaheim.

Between this story and the one about bonobo poaching, I'm supremely bummed out.

*sigh*

Where the hell is Rudolph the Red when you need him?

posted by bmarkey 09 March | 17:16

Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.

posted by sarah connor 09 March | 17:27

Heh. I knew someone would get that. Thanks, sarah.

posted by bmarkey 09 March | 17:36

You know what would rock more than standing on this.
Standing on this with tourists and secretly playing the sound of cracking glass on a hidden tape player.

posted by seanyboy 09 March | 18:05

nuh-uh tommasz. a towelette isn't enough. but the water hose concession...

posted by flopsy 09 March | 18:12

Metal detectors and signs saying "No Glass-cutters Allowed."

posted by warbaby 09 March | 19:04

Standing on this with tourists and secretly playing the sound of cracking glass on a hidden tape player.

That - but using a sound of obviously shattering, cascading glass - combined with a quick little knees-giving-way deadman's fall type stunt would probably give someone a heart attack.

I've done the deadman's fall trick to most of my siblings while standing on various grates. The ones you find around big buildings like hospitals or office buildings spanning deep access or ventilation pits are ideal. You just do a sharp intake of breath like you're getting ready to shout "Ooooh Sssshhit!" and fake-fall by letting your knees go lax so it looks like your whole body is suddenly plummeting. Then you watch your siblings scramble over each other trying to get off of the grate. Yeah, my siblings probably hate me.

posted by loquacious 09 March | 21:44

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