MetaChat - Death of a thousand cuts (minus nine hundred and nintey nine cuts)

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27 February 2006

Death of a thousand cuts (minus nine hundred and nintey nine cuts) Argh, I've got a small but deep cut on my thumb, it's in a place where it's just not going to heal (it reopens every time I use my thumb for anything), and it hurts like mofo. That's all, I just wanted to complain, thank you for your attention.

post by: Capn at: 12:54 | 27 comments

My wife has a problem with this from time to time. She uses some kind of Band-aid liquid goo, and apparently it works quite well. Might want to try that out.

posted by selfnoise 27 February | 12:56

Amputation is your only recourse.

posted by mike9322 27 February | 12:59

They stop bothering you once you get 900 or so.

posted by stilicho 27 February | 13:00

*kisses the boo-boo*

*magical healing powers of my saliva make wound immediately start to heal*

posted by iconomy 27 February | 13:05

super glue

posted by Lafe 27 February | 13:06

Listen to mikey. Get the glue. I hear Superglue also works in a pinch.

posted by jrossi4r 27 February | 13:07

If it makes you feel any better, I also sustained a finger injury this weekend. I bashed my left index finger with a framing hammer, causing the skin to split open all along the edge of the nail.

A blister formed on my fingertip, and filled with blood! OMG! Now, if I hit the finger and cause it to start bleeding again, the bilster instantly fills up with more blood. I'm doing my best to keep it covered and padded, but with the fingertip bandaged, my hand feels strange.

posted by pieisexactlythree 27 February | 13:08

Ok, I will pick up the medical glue on the way home tonight, and if that doesn't work, then, as mike suggests, the thumb will have to go.

posted by Capn 27 February | 13:13

This is interesting. I just assumed you had a hook hand, Capn. Maybe nows the time, eh?

posted by jrossi4r 27 February | 13:17

Well, yes, one. Two hook hands would be impractical.

posted by Capn 27 February | 13:26

Awesomely impractical.

posted by jrossi4r 27 February | 13:29

Ask weretable about amputation techniques. A few months back he tried to smash two of his fingers off by wedging them in between two heavy objects. Or maybe it was one heavy object and a stationary thing, like a wall or a truck. I don't remember. That's not the point.

The point is: even though the amputation was unsuccessful, he had fun doing it. And wouldn't have felt any thumb cuts, I don't think.

posted by Specklet 27 February | 13:32

Superglue is the answer. That's what that liquid bandage stuff is, anyway, just a different grade. Also works for when you cut your nails too short and the nailbed keeps peeling open every time you pick up something.

posted by loquacious 27 February | 13:36

Capn, I think you might be surprised at the healing nature of your OWN saliva. I propose you put that thumb in your mouth, and keep it there, except when you are eating, for at least a week.

If you still have any friends at that point, they can help you amputate.

posted by richat 27 February | 13:49

Richat, I've heard that dog spit has even more healing powers, maybe I should just leave a chihuahua puppy on there for a week.

posted by Capn 27 February | 13:56

Dammit, I thought I had created the funniest mental image. You had to go and trump me didn't you?

Damn you and your scurvied thumb Capn.

posted by richat 27 February | 13:58

It's more gouty than scurvied.

posted by Capn 27 February | 14:14

The medical stuff is called Nuskin I think. It is essentially peroxided superglue as has already been mentioned.

posted by sciurus 27 February | 14:16

Ok, fine, damn you and your gouty thumb. I insist on damning you, one way or another.

posted by richat 27 February | 14:23

I'm sorry to be the voice of reason (again) but you might want to immobilize your thumb, Capn. Yes, not as fun as thumb-sucking, amputation or superglue but someone has to be the party-pooper.

posted by deborah 27 February | 14:31

loquacious: OW OW OW OW OW!

posted by matildaben 27 February | 14:39

Before you spray the glue on (there are lots of brands), try to close the wound as best you can (like, squeeze your thumb) after you've cleaned and thoroughly dried the area.

1. Getting that stuff in an open wound stings
2. If you get it in the wound, it will slow complete healing

posted by porpoise 27 February | 15:05

Well, I got some band-aid brand glue stuff especially for skin cracks (which this basically is), we'll see how it works out.

posted by Capn 27 February | 22:49

Damn, I was really hoping for an amputation and the flickr pool documenting the procedure.

posted by mike9322 27 February | 22:53

Yeesh! Fine!
≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by Capn 27 February | 23:02

Capn, you made my night. Brilliant.

*salutes*

posted by mike9322 27 February | 23:13

In the cold light of morning, I realize I should have markered a dotted line on it.

posted by Capn 28 February | 10:58

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