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11 January 2006

Poetry writing contest. [More:]

Subject: Your toes.

Go!
An ode to my toes
If you did not end my feet
My shoes would fit.
posted by Capn 11 January | 12:37
My toes are callused, dirty and hairy
but that dosen't mean
I can't be merry.
posted by jonmc 11 January | 12:41
Standing in second position
Rib cage lifted, shoulders dropped and open
I breathe, stare straight ahead, and slowly tense my legs,
Rising up on my toes.

I’m steady. I’m solid.
I can move my neck, looking around.
I won’t fall for you.
posted by rainbaby 11 January | 12:42
Yo
u

alwaz phal

b
u
t
t
e
r
s
i
d
e down

o - i thou
ght u sed
"toast"
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 11 January | 12:47
A warm lake of blood,
Or a hot lake of fire,
Or an icy lake fed by the polar caps,
which is it?

Diving in might rend my flesh,
Or sear me like a steak,
or freeze my skin 'til it pops,
do I dare?

I will test it with my toesies,
They won't know what hit 'em.
posted by Hugh Janus 11 January | 12:48
Ohes noes
I don't like
toes.
posted by mr_crash_davis 11 January | 12:56
This little piggy went to the market.
This little piggy stayed home.
This little piggy had roast beef.
This little piggy had none.
posted by jrossi4r 11 January | 12:57
This little piggy got stoned to death on the island.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 11 January | 13:02
BWAAH! I like that one, Flo.
posted by rainbaby 11 January | 13:03
Piggy had ass-mer.
posted by jrossi4r 11 January | 13:06
It is said that a person
whose second toe is longer
than than the big toe
is a throwback, a troglodyte,
one step removed from primate
ancestors.

But remember,
that's when we used
to swing through trees
and eat fruit all day; now
we sit on the couch, staring
while people die.

posted by sciurus 11 January | 13:09
Sucks to your ass-mer!
posted by Hugh Janus 11 January | 13:15
Your Pretty Feet And Toes To Toes

dreamt I had lots of toes.
First, all my toe nails were gone. Completely gone.
So that's under there,
I read toes of Cilff Richard.

Ugly toe contest, strange pictures,
funny contest, sick humor, twisted humor,
weird photos, weird pictures, ugly feet,
disgusting toes, weird contest.

The project, lovingly dubbed "Operation Toasty Toes," is
A catalog of llama gifts, llama jewelry,
llama crafts, stuffed llamas,
and llama collectibles.
The Other Economic Summit, TOES USA
TOES are held in parallel with,
and as alternatives...

Welcome To Tartan Toes!


All language above cribbed from first screen of google results for toes.
posted by safetyfork 11 January | 13:16
He'll pick up the toes from the second hand market,
on a wednesday; haggle over the price,
complain about the magenta nail varnish,
finally agree to a figure that is less
than the asking, more than he thought he'd
have to pay.

They'll wrap them in tissue and bubblewrap,
and he'll stow these
in his rucksack, slowly limp home.

Later, when the expectation is too much,
he'll carefully unwrap them. They're beautiful,
these toes
and he'll spend too many minutes singing
nursery rhymes to them.

Finally, he'll just throw them in the bin.
In his journal,
he'll describe each of them as characters in his
life. This one knew too much; you could tell
the difference between the twins if
you knew them well enough; she mothers
the little ones
like they were her own.

It's enough, but only just so. One week later,
he'll go to the bank, withdraw some money,
limp into the second hand market,
buy some more toes.

sciurus. Hot Damned. You Good!
posted by seanyboy 11 January | 15:00
Did you just write that, seanyboy? Whoa.

I am thoroughly impressed with all the toe poems.
posted by agropyron 11 January | 15:29
Toes, ten in number
Dangle from my feet
sometimes gracing,
sometimes piercing
the surface tension
of a summer lake

Dendrites spread
like negative lightning
to pierce the blinding sky
so white in color,
all else is black
ten in number, all
posted by Eideteker 11 January | 16:07
"Cute toes," she said,
and tickled them twice
There goes my head
Though fickle, she's nice

When the day is done
And tension spread
like petals of a rose
A crack in every bone
Pain leaves in a stretch
Out through curled toes
posted by Eideteker 11 January | 16:11
Though the sign says
KEEP OFF THE GRASS
I'm rapt and in repose
I've got 18 holes
of the softest grass
scrunched between my toes

No day is ever bad
Or future far too bleak
When I've got their stupid green
illicit, beneath my feet
posted by Eideteker 11 January | 16:15
rapt AND in repose, sorry (admin, please hope me pometry?)
posted by Eideteker 11 January | 16:18
My toes each have a name
And a personality all their own
Alexi cannot straighten himself
And Conrad has no bone

Lamont is always being stubbed
against wall or frame of door
Serge's nail always gets caught
in the carpet upon the floor

Walter's just a nuisance
to all the other toes
While Hank's a tad bit paranoid
and counts the rest as foes

Joel's a love, when my toes fight
He always intervenes
While Armand's full of talent
And is star of stage and screen

Misha is the quiet one
And Harvey is quite loud
But all ten of them are my toes
And I'm certainly quite proud!
posted by Eideteker 11 January | 16:27
ten. a poem.

Tip -- the line
Be on your

Best behaviour
Or else

They will be devoured
By the monster

Who lives underneath your bed
The party line
posted by kyleg 11 January | 16:35
Tired men with sandwich bags for shoes lay
Pissing, their dicks passed out through holes in old
Work pants. January, they say, is cold --
It's warm enough for open toes today.
posted by eatitlive 11 January | 17:07
Toes, not flippers
Over the centuries emerged.
Even though we intervened.
Shame, really.

- All the Dolphins
posted by Lipstick Thespian 11 January | 21:27
Truly, the winner is you, the viewer.
posted by Eideteker 12 January | 01:02
Everyone's a winner, but if pressed to reveal my favorites they would be:
Hugh Janus's, safetyfork's, seanyboy's, and Eideteker's "My Toes Each Have a Name".
posted by agropyron 12 January | 01:54
ah dammit, i missed this contest


I have been bitten by many things
dry raspy tongued snails
and ninja silent leeches
but none so weird
as the mountain stream fish
that nibbled at the fold between my toes
on that sunny day
and thats all that remains-
this mini memory
to tie me to a foreign past.



posted by dhruva 12 January | 02:28
wowie. These are really good.

Okay, I might have to try to make one later; I just want to be included in such fine company. For the posterity.
posted by taz 12 January | 02:59
I don't know how I missed this earlier, but these are great!
posted by Frisbee Girl 12 January | 03:12
We're all winners here. Yes!
posted by safetyfork 12 January | 13:24
I am ROTFL || But that is NOT MY NAME!

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