MetaChat is an informal place for MeFites to touch base and post, discuss and
chatter about topics that may not belong on MetaFilter. Questions? Check the FAQ. Please note: This is important.
14 November 2005
Today’s helpful gardening tip. →[More:]Don’t use the GREEN extension cord when cutting the grass.
Although they may look delicious, you cannot eat trees... only parts of trees... specifically "fruit".
Squirrels are not plants. Water them only for amusement, not to make them grow.
Plant in the spring, harvest in the fall. But you can listen to the seminal Neil Young albums Harvest and Harvest Moon at any time of year
Lobby your local congressional representative to have your garden declared a historical landmark, for tax purposes.
Some plants will grow better if played classical music. Conversely, orchids like the later atonal works of Philip Glass.
Never plant potatoes and carrots in adjacent beds. One time, on lj, potatoes called carrots "smelly and gross" and carrots called potatoes a "dirty skank slut" and they haven't spoken since.
If you name your plants individually, you will take better care of them. Do not try this for blades of grass though. There's like a billion of those little fuckers.
Plants grow in the dirt. The filthy dirt. Where the satan lives
Ancient and backwards pagan cultures would celebrate the winter solstice by decorating an evergreen tree. Nasty savages.
What do the following fruits and vegetables have in common: Cucumbers, Carrots, Bannanas, Zucchini, Parsnips, some Eggplants? Answer: They all look like male geni-tals!
In fact, flowers and fruits are a plants geni-tals!
Many plants can be fermented to produce the demon rum, what turns men to idle lecherous sots and women to consumptive wretches
No plant has ever willingly sacrificed itself to save a human or animal life
Most deadly poisons are derived from plants
Apples, the fruit that caused The Fall Of Man are not native to the west, they were inflicted on the Christian Crusaders by the Mohamedeans
photo by splunge
photo by TheophileEscargot
photo by Kronos_to_Earth
photo by ethylene
