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04 November 2005

Whoa! I know this made the rounds a few years ago, but suddenly it seems like the perfect coffee table book![More:]I should give copies to everyone in my family, like nutty relatives sometimes do.
Book Description

I think constricting anus 100 times and denting navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective to good-bye depression and take back youth. You can do so at a boring meeting or in a subway. I have known 70-year-old man who has practiced it for 20 years. As a result, he has good complexion and has grown 20 years younger. His eyes sparkle. He is full of vigor, happiness and joy. He has neither complained nor born a grudge under any circumstance. Furthermore, he can make love three times in succession without drawing out.

In addition, he also can have burned a strong beautiful fire within his abdomen. It can burn out the dirty stickiness of his body, release his immaterial fiber or third attention which has been confined to his stickiness. Then, he can shoot out his immaterial fiber or third attention to an object, concentrate on it and attain happy lucky feeling through the success of concentration.

If you don't know concentration which gives you peculiar pleasure, your life looks like a hell.

Who doesn't need concentration which gives peculiar pleasure?
posted by Frisbee Girl 04 November | 12:21
People who viewed this book also viewed:

How to Avoid Large Ships.
posted by jrossi4r 04 November | 14:14
lol

I did an informal poll when that book first surfaced. All but one person questioned admitted to straight-faced anal "kegels" immediately after reading the title and description.

so... :) Anyone clenching right now?

agropyron.. admit it. You want that on your coffee table so you can secretely grin, knowing what your visitors are doing.
posted by reflecked 04 November | 14:28
jrossi, that was so perfect. Thank you.
A Great Metaphor for the Lessons of Life, November 20, 2002
Reviewer: A reader
I bought this book as a joke while attending a government management seminar at the Maritime Institute of Technology (located in Baltimore Md). I remember thinking to myself "you know life is tough, but it is even tougher when your stupid". Here is a book written by an old captain who is tired of running over fools in their pleasure boats, and wants to educate those same fools in a futile effort to save their lives. One can almost imagine a sequel written by a train engineer "How to Avoid Parking on Train Tracks". At any rate for several years now this book has graced by desk, and has served as an inspiration for more conversations than any other book I have ever owned. Remember as you go through life you need to keep a lookout for the huge juggernauts that can really ruin your day.
posted by Frisbee Girl 04 November | 14:34
Of course I clenched! It was almost a reflex.
posted by jrossi4r 04 November | 14:34
How do you think I got so huge -- steroids?
posted by Hugh Janus 04 November | 15:07
Ahh, so you're not huge in the Goatse sense then...
posted by eekacat 04 November | 17:25
Yup, kegeling madly here. No fire in the abdomen yet, though.
posted by mygothlaundry 04 November | 18:19
Curse of Oetzi || Off With His Thumbs!

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