MetaChat - Spam Comments Have Moved to a New Level

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14 October 2005

Spam Comments Have Moved to a New Level I just got the weirdest spam comment ever on my blog. I had to read it twice to realize it was spam - but the links over every mention of plasma TV gave it away.→[More:] Help me Dude, I'm lost.

I was searching for Elvis and somehow ended up in your blog, but you know I'm sure I saw Elvis in the supermarket yesterday.

No honest really, he was right there in front of me, next to the steaks singing "Love me Tender".

He said to me (his lip was only slightly curled) "Boy, you need to get yourself a shiny, new plasmatv to go with that blue suede sofa of yours.

But Elvis said I, In the Ghetto nobody has a plasma tv .

Dude I'm All Shook Up said Elvis. I think I'll have me another cheeseburger then I'm gonna go home and ask Michael Jackson to come round and watch that waaaay cool surfing scene in Apocalypse Now on my new plasma tv .

And then he just walked out of the supermarket singing. . .

"You give me love and consolation,
You give me strength to carry on "

Strange day or what? :-)

6:32 AM
Delete

post by: mygothlaundry at: 10:30 | 14 comments

That's wonderful! I wouldn't be upset getting cool spam like that. I have a soft spot for the email spams where they come up with a random name to fool the spam filters. Idaho P. Disco. Fashionable K. Amusement. Etc.

posted by goatdog 14 October | 10:53

At least his spam is interesting to read. But it's still spam.

posted by iconomy 14 October | 10:54

I want to get a job writing spam like that, is what I've decided. If you can't beat them, join them.

posted by mygothlaundry 14 October | 11:05

Tom Coates recently had a weird spam episode. Weird and distasteful, given that his post was talking about his emotions meeting his father for the first time in a long time.

posted by peacay 14 October | 11:31

Although I'm having a hard time delineating between spam and viral marketing.

posted by peacay 14 October | 11:32

This morning I rec'd the following email:

-------------
Imagine a new huge Pecker full of energy. Just huge.
Smash the ladies like crazy!

If your a lady, take a "monster!"

-------------

This seems to characterize sex as a combination C-Grade Zombie movie / monster truck rally / Japanese cartoon.

Which explains why the spammer probably ain't getting any.

posted by hall of robots 14 October | 11:41

Well, they have to use new and invented terminology to describe what they're selling in order to get around filters. Very sureal.

posted by delmoi 14 October | 11:48

True, but I don't think that applies to what I pasted — it isn't employing a bunch of euphemisms or random word-strings. It's mostly coherent. It just sounds like the crude, cartoonish language of a 12 year old boy who's characterizing sex like someone who's never had any.

posted by hall of robots 14 October | 12:01

Smash the ladies like crazy!

If your a lady, take a "monster!"

My husband showed me that one coupled with an email that assured him he could increase his "output" so that his lady could be awed with his gallons of juice.

All day we joked about how I was going to get mashed and flooded.

Are there any women out there are dying to get mashed and flooded?

posted by Secret Life of Gravy 14 October | 13:56

Hey, you, too, could be benefiting from the European "ropes" effect!

posted by Hugh Janus 14 October | 13:58

Are there any women out there are dying to get mashed and flooded?

Ann Coulter. (Technically she wants you to "wreck it," but I think mashed and flooded qualify as such.)

posted by jrossi4r 14 October | 14:14

I used to get poetic ones from bizarrely named people, like this, which I saved about a year ago -

From Clarence Zbeqcy to Dave Hnrerc: A late survey displays that it requires usual of just 1.3drinkings to produce a hangover. But my tablets assistances you avoid hangovers and awaken sentient splendid from head to abdomen and everyplace else.

I love that. I still want to awaken sentient splendid from head to abdomen.

posted by mygothlaundry 14 October | 14:28

My favorite spam ever was one that went for the abusive hardsell approach. "SATISFY YOUR WOMAN YOU PINDICK" it said.

posted by PinkStainlessTail 14 October | 15:00

This seems to characterize sex as a combination C-Grade Zombie movie / monster truck rally / Japanese cartoon.

Ah, now I see my problem.

posted by dg 15 October | 05:53

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