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26 September 2005
Updates, please!→[More:]Hugh, how's your dad?
Jonmc, how's your kidney?
Specklet, how's your heart?
Frisbeegirl, how's your computer?
Aw, jrossi4r, how thoughtful! My desktop is still sick, but I faced the sad truth about my laptop and replaced with one that really works and is truly portable. I will be eating ramen until next summer, but I am thrilled to be back up and running.
Still need to see the dentist, still need to see the ophthalmologist, still need to see the girl doctor... Still need to find the money to do all that. Still... peachy-keen, all things considered.
Authorities still haven't figured out who put the bomp in the bomp-a-bomp-a-bomp. But I hear that they are a step closer to discovering who put the ram in the ram-a-lam-a-ding-dong.
This weekend didn't suck. He finally got his tests done to see if he has a brain tumor or if he maybe had an aneurism. After that she can quit worrying about him so much, maybe, and talk to me a little more...
Last weekend sucked. On Saturday I shuffled, fanned, closed my eyes and pulled one card out of the Tarot deck. The way I sometimes do. No biggy. Just one card. Just to see what associations the card held for my mind. What intuitions...
Then Bev's significant other Attila had a stroke, Cricket's Mom died, Nanette's recently rescued dog snapped her cat's neck in a moment of unfurled instinct, and Nanette went off to a benefit for homeless senior dogs, where a semi-famous drummer sat in with the band and promptly suffered a ripped aorta, dying on the spot. Oh and she (the she mentioned above) went to a funeral that weekend with him.
My feet still hurt, but I can't afford to go to the podiatrist. I've gotten used to it. It's only really bad in the morning. I have a big freelance project coming up, and I can use my payment from that to go to the doctor.
And my mom's liver is fine. They don't know what's causing the irregularities, but it may be an adverse reaction to one of her prescriptions.
And Slim has stopped beating up Birdie as much as she used to. Birdie actually came out to the food dishes yesterday! Until Slim attacked her.
I'm still getting married, although we spent most of yesterday arguing about the 1000 little decisions that we're having to make for the damned wedding.
My dad is at home, resting. My mom is, predictably, hovering. I'm less nervous every day, though there are still checkups to be had, still possible chunks of plaque floating around. Blood thinners should take care of that.
I realized a few things over the last couple weeks:
. Everything has been said in my family. None of us would live in regret, wishing we could have been honest, if one of us left suddenly.
. My brother and I have a different approach than my mother does: of the three of us, she is the only one who chose to love my dad voluntarily. My brother and I have no choice in the matter; he's our father, and a good one.
. I depend on my father to keep my mother happy. It's too tough a job for me or my brother alone. It's too important a job to be entrusted to kids.
Last week, after I got the news the operation was a success, I became so exhausted I had to leave work. It was like the stress had been a balloon at the back of my neck, propping me up. Once it was relieved, the balloon was deflated, and I had nothing keeping me awake.
I don't know what I told my boss before I left. I think it was something like, "I'm leaving work. My father's alive."
I really, really like the sound of that. My father's alive.
I still wish I could make everything better, myself, though. And that goes for everybody's troubles, too. Thanks for thinking of me, jrossi4r.
In Houston we had less of a storm than the newscasters hoped we would. All local TV news people can go fuck themselves. The ALARM that they pumped out for days on end killed more people than the storm itself did.
The only damage my house suffered was nail holes around all of the windows. Power outages were brief. There was a lot of tree trash to clean up.
My children had Thursday and Friday, and now Monday and Tuesday off from school. This may be the hardest part of the storm. Gah.
And, it is Hot! I pity the folks without power, or are in long lines on the highway without AC. Going to work never looked so good to me.
I am about to go for broke on one of my crushes...at the same time my ex tells me she misses me alot (i tell her the same thing back, i'm honest)
I'm drinking a little less, but still working about 70 hours a week...fuck minimum wage...they wonder why people turn to crime...
I've lost all the weight i gained when i lived in LA, but the downside is that i started smoking cigarettes again after a 6 month hiatus...oh fucking well...
Glad to hear that the majority of us are doing better in the big picture...i love you guys...
Sometimes i tell you people stuff no one else gets to hear...
What a great thread! Thanks and blessings to everybody.
Me, I'm doing... okay. I had a really hellish couple of weeks (sobby breakdown with ex, feelings of hopelessness and despair), but I think I'm coming out of it pretty well.
I quit drinking completely on the autumnal equinox because: as fall ripens and winter approaches, the facts that I a) have had a really shitty summer and b) am prone to season affectional disorder really makes me very scared of getting clinically depressed, so why the fuck would I be putting depressants into my body on a daily basis? When I made this decision (which came about in a sudden but organic fashion) the universe sent me a couple of unmistakeable messages that this was the right thing to do, so it's been pretty easy. I miss the taste of wine, though. I wish there was a non-alcoholic version of wine, like beer and that O'Doul's shit. I'm still smoking; about four cigarettes a day on average. One thing at a time, though.
My ex and I continue to spend a fair amount of time together, which is usually low-key and, surprisingly, isn't keeping me attached to him. The sharp heart owies I am still experiencing have less to do with the ex, and more to do with the fact that I'm (nearly) 32 and want to have kids and a partner and a house with the white picket fence... and have no romantic prospects. At all.
I stress about money too much. My job, while tolerable, is a bullshit job. I'm too old to have a bullshit job. I should be using my expensive education.
I don't have a good support network right now. My ex is kind of my best friend, but for obvious reasons, we're separating ourselves emotionally right now. My best woman friend in town is going through her own shit and has been hibernating for the last couple of weeks. (It kind of hurts my feelings, actually, that she hasn't been there for me lately.) My mom is three thousand miles away.
Whoa. I just checked my email and got a message from my ex husband. We haven't communicated in two years (his move). I've been meaning to write him a brief letter for about a year, just to tell him a couple things, and for closure of some sort.
His email was pleasant, he just wanted to tell me that a mutual friend of our is on a book tour and will be here in Portland on Wednesday.
Specklet, it might be local but we have nonalcoholic wine here made from scuppernong grapes. I have had both the real thing and the nonalky and the taste is very similar. Sorry, cannot think of the label at the moment (It's a NC brand if that helps.)
Holy cow, I love scuppernongs with a passion that will never die! (I actually have a bottle of wine made from scuppernongs, my momma hauled it all the way from Florida just for me. Will have to wait to drink it, though.) I'll see what I can google up on that.
A red wine substitute is what I need, and I just don't think there's one out there. Except maybe dark chocolate.
Jobless, no real prospects, dealing with the remnants of a friend's brother's death (including, today, the literal remnants of his death, as I'm calling funeral homes and ask them if they're willing to split the ashes).
Life is a big Meh right now, and money is scary, but all in all it doesn't suck too badly.
Hugh, I'm really glad your dad's okay, and that you've come out of the experience with such a great attitude.
Best to the rest of you as well.
As Specklet says, you're a great collective band aid, or distraction, or ersatz family, or something.
I go in for the ultrasound tommorrow. On the way, I'll stop at the clinic for the results of the bloodwork, urinalysis and stone ID. I still have the back pain. I hoping that stone dosen't have freinds. If it does perhaps I'll make jewelry.
- The mister's wrist surgery is tomorrow. Getting kinda nervous about it.
- Father-in-law who had five bypasses about six weeks ago was at home and doing well and is now back at my BIL's home. He's developed an infection in the leg that the veins came from.
- I am now officially on high blood pressure meds. Being a diabetic means my BP has to be excellent if not better. I'm hoping the meds aleviate (sp?) the (almost) daily headaches I've been having for the past month or so.
- Although I hate the heat, this summer seemed really short and I'm sorry Autumn (my favourite season) is already here.
- The huge red-headed woodpecker is back and that's really cool.
Thanks for the answers, everyone. Seems like these things come up in other threads, but never get resolved. I need closure! Glad to hear that things are looking up for most. And I'm sorry for those who are still dealing with crap. Please keep us posted.
Hardy congratulations to papercake, gaspode and dame.
As for me, life is good. My best friend just informed me that she is moving to the other side of the country. But that's an inconvenience, not a tragedy. (Or so I keep telling myself.)
I really would love to be in a relationship now, but when someone talks about the difficulties of heartbreak I always think "Oh, man, am I glad I'm not feeling that crap." But I don't deal with breakups very well. I just hate it when my chest and stomach hurts and all that.
So, you have me very deepest sympathies, specklet, and best wishes. May everyone's good thoughts directed your way speed you to that happy, calm place where heartache is a distant memory.
I had a really great 3-day weekend vacation with some old old old friends who live on top of a mountain and who I haven't seen in 5 years. Being out there shook me out of my day to day frustrations and boredoms of my daily life and started a cascade of thoughts about how I can change my life in the next 5-10 years. Maybe this is the beginning of my midlife crisis. I turn 40 in 5 months.