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26 July 2005

Members, grab your tools! Pick up your toys, pack your bags, and call in the vampire zombie bunnies, we're moving here. Surely we have a glazier, a mason, a woodworker, a landscape architect and an interior decorator among us?
i can arange for the cobwebs. i know this guy...
posted by dhruva 26 July | 02:52
A mere bagatelle my dear!
posted by arse_hat 26 July | 02:54
Cool! Can I have the dungeon?
posted by mudpuppie 26 July | 03:55
Sure, mudpuppie!
posted by taz 26 July | 04:07
too haunted for my taste...can we just buy it, renovate it, and sell it to some celebrity instead?
posted by amberglow 26 July | 08:12
I bake and cook well for crowds. My nickname used to be Cookie. I'll do the cooking.
posted by omiewise 26 July | 08:25
Interior decorator?

Pfft. We're going to need miles of overhead cable trays and hundreds of miles of Cat-5 and Cat-6. We're going to need an enterprise grade power-conditioned machine room with halon, subfloors, HEPA filtered air and multiply redundant power generation backups. We're going to need gigabit ethernet switches everywhere, and a multiplexed fiber backbone. We'll have to start our own phone company and pull in OC-48 pipes until they come out our wazoo.

We're going to need lots and lots of computers. Clients, desktops, local servers, SANs, racks, clusters and pizza boxen. We're going to need screens the size of small countries. Projecters. A game room from hell. A machine shop. A physical access control system. A movie room with enough lumens and audio watts to melt hardened concrete from space, and contrast ratios so sublime it would make the Devil weep and recant in the face of such perfection.

We're going to need a library and a small forest's worth of shelving and pages. We're going to need a librarian.

We'll also need a coffee shop and bar. And lots and lots of coffee, tea and booze.

Hell, you get all of the above taken care of properly and the interior decoration takes care of itself. They even make ethernet cables in colors like hot pink or neon green these days, and computers always look good in matte black.

Does that place even have any bathrooms?
posted by loquacious 26 July | 08:54
I call footpad!
posted by Hugh Janus 26 July | 08:57
Woah, people, woah! Even if that's not Bannerman's Island, it'll require too much upkeep to maintain. May I suggest we take over Vassar College's Library instead? It's already got the fiber backbone, media center, and utilities set up, along with a reading center that has more trade journals and international papers than you could shake a stick at! Oh, yes, the building also has Macintoshes. And secured wireless! (Granted, it's 802.11b, not 802.11g, but hey, it is an old building...)
posted by Smart Dalek 26 July | 09:24
If there's a tower with a lightning rod for my laboratory, I'm in.

I did the communications rebuild engineering and project management on WWU (fiber backbone, CATV, phone and data). And I used to be a remodeling contractor. Before that I was apprenticed to an Italian stone mason and tile mechanic for three years.

We'll probably need an indoor target range.
posted by warbaby 26 July | 09:45
His 'n Her lightning rods, warbaby.

The absence of a moat is troubling. Is there anyone who can install an olympic size moat with penguin sunning pads?
posted by taz 26 July | 10:02
it'll be a bitch to heat but i bet we have fuel for the fire--
--oops, wrong fire
anyhoo, i'm game
lived in worse
could probably pull off most of the jobs but you'll need a real mason
else they get pissy
let's not piss off the masons
posted by ethylene 26 July | 10:08
       ≡ Click to see image ≡
In January 1862, John Ynyr Burges visited Gosford, and recorded in his diary: "We found the large round room completed, all but the fireplace... The castle appears an immense library, for my room is full of books and all of the choicest kinds, with the most perfect bindings. The new apartments consist of long corridors and morning rooms belonging to this family, and sleeping ditto, are handsome and comfortable, and the beautiful and rare china does not fail to give a most picturesque effect... The dining hall brings you back to feudal days. the table, which is profusely covered with every delicious viand and the choicest wines, rather beats the banquet hollow of our Norman ancestors... You eat, drink ,talk and laugh immensely. There is something in the air and cheer around you that encourages you to do so"...

posted by taz 26 July | 10:25
Casino bidder?! This sounds like a hit job for the attack bunnies.
posted by taz 26 July | 10:29
There is something in the air and cheer around you that encourages you to do so"...

"Later that night, i found out just what that something in the air actually was...." /cue scary Saturn music
posted by amberglow 26 July | 12:07
Oh my! For a moment I thought Taz was really moving there. WOw!
posted by dabitch 26 July | 12:10
Dude. We totally have to do this. I'm an interior architect, so I get to be The President.

Oh yeah, and: Tools, grab your members!
posted by Specklet 26 July | 12:32
Vassar has chicks too, right? So that's another point in its favor over the haunted castle.
posted by mr_crash_davis 26 July | 12:44
I'll do the electricity! I think I can score us a cheap deal on old style cast iron radiators too. I'm ready. Y'all packed yet?
posted by dabitch 26 July | 15:59
if moving in there will let me be eurotrash, i'm in.

eiretrash? : >
posted by amberglow 26 July | 18:45
So wrong! || Unanswerables