User:Fuzzbean

Fuzzbean: Phenomenon or Crackpot Hoax?

API

19 May 2006

Seattle, WA

Scientists from the Institute for Altered Legumes today released definitive evidence that the appearance of the Fuzzbean (Lat. Legumus Ticklus) is not a widely-disseminated hoax, but a solid fact.

For months now, sightings on the Internet of a strange, fuzz-covered bean have caused an uproar at the FDA, National Health Administration, as well as with curious Slow Food groups across the country. Several spiritual and epicurean blogs have commented on the ingestion of the bean and it's attendant hallucinogen properties. Reports include talk of levitation, a heightened experience of sound and color, and in one instance, a prolonged feeling of "oh hell yeah."

While a definitive sample of the bean has not been submitted for testing, it has been verified that the Fuzzbean is non-toxic and in some cases considered to be beneficial to patients suffering from depression or anxiety. Or as one foodie put it, "it tastes like the lint from God's Laundry Machine, man! I'm looking through a glass pumpkin!"