Dmitri the Lover

While perusing the Canadian ads on LavaLife, Orange Swan noticed a personal ad in the name of DMITRITHELOVER, ad below:

Greek descent, 6’2”, brown hair, green eyes, lean build, 7” endowment, sexually insatiable (3-4 times a day). I believe in loyalty, NOT MONOGAMY. I believe that a couple should have sex with others TOGETHER, not off on their own. I am a hopeless romantic seeking a life partnership, but open to one short-term with a “wait and see” attitude. I am highly intelligent (IQ 170), post-graduate educated, financially secure, and own my own companies. But I am not materialistic. I love dogs, chocolate, food, and chiropractors (most physicians are money-grubbing pill pushers). Here is how my ex described me in a “couples” profile: “He’s extremely considerate, loves animals, is kind yet speaks his mind, extremely romantic, passionate beyond belief, sexually insatiable, dominant in a sweet way, and capable of making love for hours on end. The man has a brilliant intellect and is the greatest conversationalist I have ever met.” You are an attractive, free-spirited, sexually open, adventurous woman. Intelligence is a must, but education, social class, and age are unimportant. I come from a poor family, so I treat all with respect and am not impressed by social status. You must be your own person and care not what family or friends think. You must enjoy good conversation and appreciate my warped, twisted, witty, sarcastic humour. I enjoy plenty of oral - giving and receiving, so please be clean-shaven and of impeccable hygiene. I take good care of myself, so you must not be obese. If you are intrigued, not intimidated by my confidence, and possess the courage to pursue a sexually fulfilling yet spiritually and emotionally stable relationship, send me your name & contact #. Don’t be shy if you are inexperienced, since I am a patient, gentle teacher. Based on the flood of responses I've had so far, it may take a while for me to get back to you. I rarely respond to profiles, so if I respond to yours, consider it an honour. Dimitri

The bunnies responded with a good amount of humor...and then the man showed up himself.

This is an on-going saga.