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12 July 2018
Alphabetized Brief Catchup Does everyone feel good? How is July, kids?
Sorry, dozed off before signing the thing! Now that I've got that out of my system:
1) I actually have been very tired this week - spent two days in a whirlwind of packing and hauling things down stairs to get my mom moved to a new apartment across town. I finished up just in time for my sister to get into town from her own cross-country move, and now she's staying in my mom's old apartment for the month while she figures out where she wants to live/work/etc in the state. Family is great & all, but family (and moving) is exhausting.
2) I'm realizing that I haven't been taking my job search/training seriously lately, so I need to focus on that. It's too easy to treat this time as a sort of endless weekend.
3) I also need to double down on exercise and just generally getting outside. I treated myself to a new camera bag that actually fits the stuff that I don't usually bring along (tripod, bird book, power pack, etc.) Hikes will be a bit more of a workout with the extra weight, but it shouldn't turn the back of my shirt into a sweaty mess the way my backpack does. Plus, I'll feel better about it sitting in the car if I run into the store because it doesn't scream "I have a camera inside!" like the old one did.
The Tour de France is going on across the pond, but here Texas we have the Tour de Fort Worth, a series of bicycle rides most days while the Tour de France is going on.
I'm not making every ride, but I've ridden the last couple of evenings and last night I got a selfie with Fort Worth Mayor Betsy Price.
The hot weather broke for a couple of days and I got a bunch of yard work done including removing several hundred pounds of trimmings from trees.
Still on tenterhooks about two relatives who are in hospital and have been for a few months and the doctors are not very optimistic. Worst part is they are brother and sister and their mom is having to face the possibility of losing them both just a couple of years after their dad died.
My snuggle cat Whitey Ford just gets more sweet and cuddly as he gets more elderly and frail.
1. The weather in the UK has been glorious. Very hot and sunny. And although it can be a bit much at times, given our general lack of air-conditioning (particularly on the Underground), it's generally improved everyone's mood. I've been going with my neighbour on late afternoon/early evening walks in the forest with her two dogs, with no fear of quagmire mud, which we had for months after a very wet autumn and winter.
2. The World Cup has been great. I got behind England after my home nation was knocked out. The semi-final was a disappointment but, unlike previous tournaments (Euro and World), the fans were 100% behind the team and the coach, most of whom were on the world stage for the first time. So people have a sense that "the lads did us proud".
3. I am being a lot more social than usual. Yesterday I went with a friend to the Trump demo in London. It was wonderful, peaceful, lots of fun, people paddling in the fountains in Trafalgar Square, some wonderful banners and tons of 'Trump Baby in a Cage' banners and mini-sculptures. I thought my protesting days were done, and because I'm so short, I hate being in big crowds. But it was fine, although a couple of people didn't seem to understand the laws of physics - if I am occupying a space, they cannot also occupy the same space at the same time. But I have a low centre of gravity and it's hard to shove me out of the way, particularly if you're a slip of a girl. You'll just bounce off me.
Today I'm going to a music festival (The headline act is Squeeze!!) and at the end of the month it's Steve Earle and the Dukes on their 30th anniversary Copperhead Road tour (very excited about that one!).
Sorry about your relatives, arse_hat. But, awww, old man Whitey Ford ...
Latter part of fourth of July was spent in ER; all the symptoms of detached retina thankfully turned out to be complicated vitreal detachment. I'm hampered now by a dark web across the vision in one eye. Hopefully it should resolve eventually. Makes my computer work more difficult. Plus both jobs are going through stressful times.
Today is a nice weather day after lots of steamy days. I'm taking a break for a bit after retail job, then will be pulling weeds and mowing.
I have hot dogs (splurged on boars head meat dogs) and all the fixings and glorious bakery buns waiting for me tonight since I didn't get through them on the fourth. Yum.
Y is for Yay Senyar! I have been enjoying seeing the placards.
L is for the massive lethargy I feel way too much of the time. Lyme test tomorrow, because I live in an active Lyme area and my dog brings in ticks. The ticks I see are dog ticks, but the nymph ticks also carry Lyme and are tiny.
P is for my friend's annual summer party yesterday evening. So Fun, nice people, music, food. Feeling socially exhausted today.
Summer in Maine is the best. Wish I had hot dogs, but I had a giant bowl of roasted Brussels sprouts and they are so good.
Hugs to dg if useful, and anyone else who would like one.
Went to a very fun music fest right in my neighborhood this weekend. There were like 300 bands in dozens of indoor and outdoor venues for two days and just lots of people out on the street dancing and drinking and being neighborly. I really love my city sometimes. Saw my friend's band play at The Young Men's Republican Club of Allegheny which despite its name has nothing to do with Republicans or young men but is a hilariously preserved old-man bar that sells $3 PBRs and $5 shots of whiskey.
I've gone way off the deep end with my photography and bought a 1960 4x5 press camera and will be spending $1 a shot taking pictures this summer. The pictures that you take with that thing look like this so it's worth the $ on film.
Have tickets to see Radiohead in two weeks and am just way excited about that.
Thanks for the hugs and sorry for bringing things down. After nearly five years in the single wilderness, I met and fell madly in love with the most amazing woman. But then she dumped me. But things just might not be completely lost. We're chatting and, well, who knows?
I is for incomprehensible - despite still missing Ms J, I decided the best thing was to get back out there, so put myself back on the online dating market and, after a few false starts, met a lovely woman who seemed to have a lot in common with me. I knew she had fairly recently been dumped and that the dumper had gone back to his ex from some time ago, but thought nothing of it. Then it turns out his ex is the very Ms J that I was missing.
J is for joking, right? - then, it further transpires that, despite him having dumped her, they were still together sporadically up until a week ago. Yes, he was cheating on my ex (a woman I still love) with a woman I'd just made the first steps in a new relationship with.
K is for ke-rist's sake, it gets messier. Having been told the woman I've just started up with has been making the beast with two backs with the current partner of a woman I still love (to her credit, not since we got together), I was tortured as to whether I should tell Ms J or not. In the end, I didn't really have a choice - she deserved to know.
L is for laugh, because what the fuck else can you do?
M is for mess - this whole soap-opera-in-real-life seems most likely destined to end with four broken hearts, only one of which deserves it.
N is for now I'm kind of missing being bored and lonely. This whole fucking love rectangle or whatever it is is way outside my experience or understanding.
Folks, you couldn't write this story if you tried.
Q is for quite a bit worse - how things went from the above. The scumbag at the heart of alll this shit has been determined that, if he can’t have what he wants, nobody will. Much abuse and nastiness by email, phone and various messenger platforms followed, all while I’m continuing to see the new lady and getting heartily sick of the whole shitfight. Ended up with a list of things being told me on Friday night about Ms J, none of which I believed but some of which seemed like they might contain a kernel of truth. Despite having arrived at new lady’s place intent on telling her I was not going to see her any more, the list of things got me so confused and angry that, instead, a bout of revenge sex followed.
R is for regretting what I’d done, I told her I was getting out the next morning, breaking a woman’s heart for the second time in a week. Walked away feeling like an absolute shit.
S is for seriously fucked up, right?
T is for thinking about what and who really matters, so I met up with Ms J at church on Sunday and we then went for coffee. A very long, frank, honest and confronting conversation later, along with some tears and a lot of forgiving from both sides (mostly me) and a line being drawn under the past, and we came out the other side acknowledging that our love for each other had never wavered, despite some terrible decisions of late. So, here we are back together, very tentatively, a lot wiser and both regretful about any number of things. Not starting back where we left off, but a fresh start.
U is for, yes, unwavering. Hard to believe we might just come through this dark period not only intact, but stronger. This is a woman who I fell absolutely head over heels with the moment I laid eyes on her and never stopped. When you know, you know. I guess we’ll see what the future holds, but I’m cautiously optimistic. I don’t think this is one of those things we’ll look back at in years to come and laugh about (there’ll never be a funny side to this), but I do think it may turn out to be some kind of test for us and I think we just might have passed.
I guess we’ll see. I hope to come back with good news a little down the track. Thanks for listening.
photo by splunge
photo by TheophileEscargot
photo by Kronos_to_Earth
photo by ethylene
