I think it's my age but I found the line "Less sexual, more whimsical" really touching.

I think I do a version of this for free out of sheer boredom, but have recently seriously considered charging, if for nothing else than the sake of the symbolic clarity of a monetary transaction.

Allow me to play doubles advocate here for a moment. For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there.

That's funny stuff. Mondegreens galore!