1) work's busy, but good, and making some sense, which is nice.

2) Two friends are BOTH having second interviews today at the same agency. I'm nervous for both of 'em!

3) Been awfully busy lately, and am not around mecha as much as I used to be. Boooo.

1. Half day today. Went shopping for belated birthday stuff for myself this afternoon. New pair of cords and a kindle cover thingy. Also bought Maddie some new clothes bc I am a sucker and can never resist buying stuff for her.

2. Yay new kindle! It's already loaded up with loads of Wodehouse and various classics. Yay free books!

3. Packing, packing packing.

Very awesome, Senyar.

1. Working from home is eating my brain. There's way too much to do here. Decided to head back into the office tomorrow, as my hobbling has gone from wince-inducing to merely awkward.

2. Going to see Wicked tonight! I'm so excited. I bought a new dress for it and everything. I only know that one song from Glee (don't hate) so this'll be a fun experience. And it's nice to see coworkers outside of work.

3. Vanity size is getting out of control. I went shopping today and I'm pretty aware of my size. I'm sure I'm not a size four; I'm sure I'm not a small. And yet, here we are. I really wonder what actual small people do. It's frustrating, especially with women's clothes. I wish I could just give them my measurements and have them figure it out, because trying on three different sizes of one piece of clothing is stupid.

1. Not a good week. I am feeling tired of my job.

2. My cat has died, so now I really do live alone.

3. The only thing to be glad about is that the Yankees are in 1st place. Even though they are meaningless, sometimes sports can be very comforting.

Oh Janet, I am so sorry. One day that cat-shaped hole in your life will be filled with another little cat who needs you.

1. Had my second ever not-date with someone from OKC. It was our first meeting, just kinda the sniff test (I followed the rmless protocol, though we skipped the phone call). We talked over drinks and then decided to get dinner. All in all, not a bad way to pass three hours. She's cute, thoughtful, and just a little bit weird. Not really looking for anything serious right now, but given that I've never really dated, I need the practice.

2. Fucked up this morning and left my monthly railpass/unlimited metrocard in my shirt pocket. Which I dropped off at the laundromat. By the time I got to the subway station, realized I didn't have it, and rushed back to the laundromat, it was already in the washer. I had to make the woman stop the machine so I could retrieve it. By the time I got to Penn Station, my train had left. LIRR customer service at least replaced the metrocard (the railpass doesn't have a magstripe or anything, and is still legible) so I'm not out any money. I really, really, really have been trying to make this commute work, but I just don't know. The next train wasn't for 90 minutes, so I just went home sick for the day (and I was feeling sick by this time). I hate that I can't just say "I'm working from home" and not have it be a deal. I hate that I've finally found an office I kinda like with nice coworkers, and it's a 2 hour commute.

3. Spending a lot of time working on myself lately. I hope it's for the best, and not the kind of morbid self-contemplation Travis Bickle talks about in Taxi Driver. Life *is* really good right now, and it's ok for me to be happy. I realized the other day that I'm not scared people won't like me because I don't like me. I do like me. But between a hypercritical mother and spending most of my childhood being bullied, I'm always scared people won't like me. Terrified, really. Like, if I'm not funny or affectionate, people won't like me. People won't talk to me. People will leave. That sort of thing. I always have to be better. Smarter. Funnier. So, I'm trying to spend some time being me, not taking rejection personally, and being less reliant on others for validation/approval/affirmation. Fun times ahead.

On Preview: JL, I'm so sorry. My offer still stands. Call me anytime you need to.

1. I get free pizza for dinner in geology lab tonight (also, I love my geology class/lab).

2. I'm ready for the weekend to come; I'll be playing D&D with my boyfriend and roommate.

3. I rearranged my dorm room furniture again today, since I can't make up my mind about it.

1. Coughing is so bad that I'm going to the doctor tomorrow. Which I hate doing, because a) I'm contributing to the health care crisis and b) they'll find nothing wrong, and tell me it'll go away eventually.

2. Time to start dieting again. A summer of lots of hot dogs was not the wisest move.

3. *cough cough* cough*

Oh and the girl I met last night is coming with me to the Silence of the Lambs musical next week (just before it closes), so that's good. That was actually my pitch, because she responded to the SotL reference in my OKC profile. "What better way to see a musical about serial killers than with a stranger from the Internet?" At first, she was worried it was serious (it's more of a parody than a straight retelling) and that she'd laugh at inappropriate moments. So that's good, because (as you all know) I'm all about inappropriate.

So we met last night for drinks, which turned into food, and after a three-hour long thing, she gave me a nice hug. So, I guess she liked me? I still feel like I did too much talking (I'm shy/introverted (no really) but I get chatty when nervous). I need to be better at asking her questions next time.

1. Headache day. Some days i wake up with a headache and it never goes away all day, it is like someone hit me with a hammer, gently, on certain portions of my skull over and over while I was asleep.

2. Postponed due to 1.

3. Postponed due to laziness with 1 as a cover.

Sorry about your kitty JL. New kitty new kitty.

1) I got a new laptop, too. Just in time for my...
2) Work trip to San Francisco/Palo Alto next week
3) But the IT guy messed up setting it up, which sucks.

JL, I am so so sorry. Hugs to you.

I am so sorry for your loss, JanetLand.

1. Mom's on a tirade again, calling me at 10-minute intervals yelling about my son stealing a bed pillow, bed sheets, ashtray, and tv guide. It's the Alzheimer's.

2. Really cold today. Actually running the heat-pump.

3. Heating leftovers for dinner.

Sorry about your cat, JL. . .it sucks, death, no matter who it is that dies (except mosquitos). I hope you start feeling better MM.

1. Spent the last 90 min trying to get my new 64-bit WIN7 machine to work with an instrument. This is taking my head back to my old WIN 3.X-95-XP days of feeling like I live in a dysfunctional family. The plus side is that I spent a lot of time on the phone with Kendra in Minneapolis, from the maker of this instrument, trying to figure out why said instrument seems my computer but my computer does not see said instrument. Still not working and I give up for the day.

2. We are out of food but I am basically pulling a great dinner out of. . .well I am conjuring one up, is better to say. Some pasta tossed with some leftover chinook salmon, roasted garlic, and assorted veggies and herbs, all out of the garden. Beans, kale, broccoli, basil, oregano, thyme, all out there waiting to be picked and cooked and eaten.

3. It was fun to see ourselves dancing on TV (well the internet replay) and it has injected a nice little spark between us, if ya know what I mean and I'm sure ya do. . .

Oh JanetLand I am so sorry about your kitty. Hugs.

Been busy dealing with rebuilding barn roof since vist from Irene so wishing belated happy birthdays to all I missed and hugs to all who need them.

So looking forward to getting grime layer off after day of sweaty work.

Mom's birthday is Sunday and I need to come up with something for her. Been stumped for a couple of weeks now and the budget is tiny. I bet deadline will help!

Oh, so sorry for your loss, JL.

Sorry for your loss, JanetLand! :(

1. Tonight was church council. I always dread going because they can sometimes be contentious. But this one was fairly uneventful, and now it's done! Also, a really crabby member of the council just got a new job that is going to make her happy, and I think that might make her less crabby. And I'm home having a glass of wine! What a night! HUZZAH!

2. Going to a wedding in Hudson this weekend. I hope it'll be a lovely country getaway- I'm staying at a very old inn, and hope to spend some time Sunday before I come back browsing artsy shops. The bride is a girl who went to my 1st college. I'm hoping there aren't too many other people I used to know there, I didn't have many friends at that place and somehow making small talk with people you used to know is worse than getting to know strangers, at least for me. Have to decide what to wear soon!

3. We're out of food around here, too, and my creativity is low. Very much hoping Stynx makes it to Costco this weekend.

I'm sorry JanetLand

1.Someone I feel very drawn to is getting married.
2.I want to shove my fist through a window.
No 3.

I am sad to hear about your kitty, JanetLand.

1. Shit is getting weird here.
2. I think I will have to decide in mid-October to either stay in Fresno or I don't know what.
3. The side effects from the diuretics are getting worse, still tolerable but noticeably worsening from one week to the next.

*huggles* for JanetLand.

1. Work is good, in that I finally have things to do, and I've been in training Monday and Tuesday to do new things. And my trainer is coming back down in a bit once I get some new software installed to train me to do even more new things! I was getting pretty bored.

2. School sucks. Suckity suck suck suuuuuuuuuuuuck. I hate my classes this term (Research in Information and Library Science, Information Behavior) and am really struggling to find the motivation to do anything for them. Which is a problem, because this is my very last semester and I need to do well to avoid another GovDocs fuckup. I know it's likely one of those things where once I get started, I'll be able to do better, but damnit, the starting part is a real bitch.

3. OMG I HAVE A LIFE. When did this happen? And it's totally tiring. (I've got swim class starting next Monday, pilates with mom on Tuesday, going to the gym to lift weights twice a week, school, NARA, actual work, Wicca class--argh!) How do normal people do this and stay up past 830? I'm so ready for Saturday, but I might not be able to rest then because I'm sure my mom will want to go shopping and I'm eligible to get a new phone (finally) so I want to go do that.

I had this bookmarked to do yesterday but totally forgot.

Janetland, I'm so sorry! Losing a beloved pet is so hard, in part because the grieving process is so uncertain and sometimes unobserved by those around us. I'm sending you lots of good thoughts and hugs.

1. Weird pain.

2. New perfume (Demeter's Orange Juice).

3. A stack of books on Hitchcock's oeuvre.

So sorry to hear it, JL.

And sympathy, Thorzdad.

2. I think I will have to decide in mid-October to either stay in Fresno or I don't know what.

There is always Bakersfield. Or, if that is too big a city, there is Taft.

No, I need a bigger city. I think one of my biggest problems right now is I am starved for anything that resembles culture.

I know. . .I was just teasing.

Oh, Thorzdad, that's so hard. I'm sorry you're going through this.

df: Oh, damn, I should have caught that. My head has been full of cotton for a few days now.

I caught what danf was saying. If Fresno isn't the asshole of California, Bakersfield is. *snerk*

df: Oh, damn, I should have caught that. My head has been full of cotton for a few days now.

Well the Bakersfield Sound comes from there, so it cannot be all bad. But can't imagine living in Maricopa, Taft, or anywhere there off to the west. I did drive through Tehachapi, and found it sort of nice (but then I had just been through Barstow).

on Wednesday I:

- baked thumbprint cookies, which turned out edible but bland.

- cried over the obituary that my mother wrote for her father. In spite of missing him, it was surprisingly comforting, realizing how much he did with his ninety-two years... will probably write about him sometime if a thread comes along that is good for those sorts of stories.

- went to Taizé to help get my thoughts in order and relax a bit, and then stopped at Kiva Han for a couple of hours to drink tea and read Livy. Now that I'm mostly settled in my new place, loneliness is starting to return again, so it's nice to be around people even if interaction is superficial.