At least the Corgis have a nice home.

"Walkies!"

I wonder what all that land gets used for.

How did the ancestor with the purple poo acquire all that land? How much land can be legitimately owned by one family or corporation?

Parliament's meddled with the succession so many times now it's a perfectly established part of the tradition.

So fine, keep the monarchy. Every year, have a lottery to see who gets to be King or Queen.

anoiola:

The Anglo-Saxon tradition was that the King was elected by a small group of nobles.

Then in 1066, there was the Norman Conquest when William the Bastard took over the country by military conquest and a decades-long reign of terror and oppression (E.g.).

Between 1455 and 1485 there were the Wars of the Roses, when during and after the reign of the weak (and possibly insane or mentally handicapped) Henry VI, the rival houses of York and Lancaster fought over the crown. See Shakespeare's Henry VI and Richard III for that story.

Then the Tudors settled that hash with some effective war-waging and marriage. Dull competent Henry VII, Henry VIII, Elizabeth I, etc.

Then 1642 to 1649 everyone got fed up with Charles I for raising taxes without Parliament and being suspiciously Catholic-loving. So we had a revolution, the English Civil War, and Oliver Cromwell chopped his head off and established a Commonwealth.

During the Commonwealth though everyone got really pissed off because the Puritans stopped everyone having fun. When Cromwell died they just got his Charles II back from his extended holiday in France. He was too busy shagging to get into much trouble.

However, his successor James II was again too catholic. So the nobles and Parliament kicked him out and invited in William III, a semi-random Dutch guy who was good at fighting wars and was super-Protestant again. This was called The Glorious Revolution, possibly ironically. But the terms of it made it clear Parliament had the upper hand over the monarchy.

After King Billy's daughter died without issue, again Parliament sent off for a new king, this one from one of the little future-German states, George I. His heirs became George II and George III, which is where we came in.

Haven't they started raising the Corgis for meat, to help defray some of the costs?

Thank you for that summary, TheophileEscargot. It filled in gaps and connected dots, and did it in an interesting way. I'm going to pass it along to my Englandphile housemate, who will also appreciate it.

I'm also a fan of your lottery system.

And the royals still can't marry Catholics and stay in the line of succession; Buddhists, Muslims, Hindus, Atheists, etc. but not Catholics. But I've read they're discussing changing it( the Act of Settlement 1701) along with letting women precede their brothers to the throne (e.g. Anne before Andrew).