There is no place safe in my house for such treats.

Actually, the problem with being tall is that people are always asking you get stuff off high shelves in supermarkets. Usually, I don't mind, but one day I'll be drunk and in a bad mood and I'll say "climb up and get it yourself, you old bat."

I've been told that my natural state in public appears to be an angry scowl (not on purpose, it just happens) so I don't run into a lot of "can you get that for me?"

I also "stand like a bouncer", whatever that means. I guess people don't ask pudgy bouncers for top-shelf items.

Maybe you can put them in the back of the bottom shelf under the stove (which is where I put Cookware That Is Infrequently Used But Is Essential That One Time Of Year).

My 6'-2" husband frequently leaves everyday items on top of the fridge, because for him the fridge is just another surface. For me, it's not only above eye level, it's above my head, and I never think to look there. Exasperation ensues.

Also, a (tall) friend refers to the top shelves in his kitchen "Specklet-proof", and will hide things there like mini-donuts coated in coconut.

I'm thinking I either need to rent a loft then befriend Yao Ming & have him hide things for me, or develop absentmindedness. Either way, really.

I had a passive-aggressive housekeeper at a hotel in Berlin shove the duvet I was using to the back of the top of the wardrobe. He quit after I pulled over a chair and was able to reach it that way.

1) Put doughnuts in freezer-safe plastic bag, with all the air expressed from it.
2) Put the bag in a bowl of water.
3) Put the bowl of doughnuts into freezer and let it turn into a tiny iceberg.

I just don't bring snacks in the house unless they're tiny portions or if I'm having people over to share.

Goddamn, maudlin, that is some hardcore stuff right there! Sysinfo, there's your answer.

Actually, what I usually do is hide things way down low from my 6'8" husband, because he is known for thinking that life doesn't exist beneath his knees. What works in this case is that he doesn't realize what great stuff I keep way down there.

I have a similar problem with buying things I shouldn't eat in moments of weakness. What works for me is to have a few of whatever it is, just enough to where I'm not ravenously craving them. Then dump the rest into the garbage.

It seems wasteful, but the money is already spent, and it's not like I'm going to eat any less of anything else if I eat the junk food, so it's better just to get rid of it and avoid further temptation. It actually feels kind of good, like a small victory in the overall battle.

Regarding problems with being tall, I have this kind of discussion with my best friend all the time. I am quite tall, and she is relatively short. Some of the issues we run into are the same. Being at opposite ends of the bell curve, we have about equal trouble finding clothes the right size.

But to cite a couple of the most recent examples: I never have to hurriedly flip down the sun visor in my car, because I can just sit up a bit straighter and the top of the windshield ends up below the horizon. She never has to worry about banging her head on sprinkler pipes in parking garages. It seems to work out about even for both of us.

The problem with being ambidextrous is that when I put tasty things away out of reach of my right arm I can still reach them with my left arm. It's a plight, I tell you.

I'm going to have to give locking them away behind ice a try, thanks maudlin!

"stand like a bouncer" I get "eyes like a sniper".

I have the opposite problem of too-strong impulse control which leads to things like 3 yr old packs of cookies that I know I'll eat *someday* but are too good to eat right now.

As an aside. . .every time that someone asks me to reach up and get something high, I tell them that the next time I need something picked up off the floor, I'll give them a call.

Very short person myself but I'm able to climb atop whatever I need to reach the tasty things.

I am with TPS -- don't let junk in the house. And here's my hardcore solution when I fail, which I picked up from a novel about an anorexic character -- I put the tasty thing in the sink and run water on it. Then down the garbage disposal it goes. (I realize this is super hard core but I truly would prefer to fit in my clothes.)

My anti-overeating tip for eating out: Do you feel compelled to keep snacking on your fries or whatever when you're clearly finished with a meal, but the plates haven't been taken away? If you're not going to take the food home, pour some of your beverage on it!

My 6'-2" husband frequently leaves everyday items on top of the fridge, because for him the fridge is just another surface.

I did this to myself. No, really. When we moved in here five or six years ago, I started storing lots of stuff on the tippy-top of our kitchen cabinets (not much choice given our tiny kitchen). Then I was injured and lost almost an inch in actual height, an inch or so in artificial height because I can't wear heels, and a couple of inches of stretch.

I can't reach the things on the tippy-top without standing on something... but I also can't remember that in mid-stream of cooking or prepping, so I'm often brought up short in mid-act and have to go fetch a chair.

Do you feel compelled to keep snacking on your fries or whatever when you're clearly finished with a meal

I have learned to tell myself "There will be more fries another day." That really works for me. Unless the fries are EXCELLENT, in which case I'm eating them all and not feeling any regret.

I can reach anything I put away too.
Which is not a problem of being tall I don't think.
But the whole problem is academic for me.
I suffer some insomnia. One of the things that I realised is that I just need to eat more in the evening.
I just didn't eat enough and woke up at night as a result.
That has its advantages when you see the contours of your abdominals and your deltoids and what not but is less great when your ribcage starts to shine through as well.

[ships jouke a large box of the finest American junk food]

I've been told that my natural state in public appears to be an angry scowl (not on purpose, it just happens) so I don't run into a lot of "can you get that for me?"
I get the same - people who've met me a few times have been known to ask others if I ever smile. It's not that I'm sad or angry at all, it's just me face.

Thank you so much.
That is indeed some very fine junk food.

New plan: whatever I cave on buying but don't manage to encase in ice, I'm sending to jouke.

I'm the junk food fairy; I secretly visit your house and spirit superfluous junk food away.
Sometimes out of the corner of your eye you'll just see my emaciated lanky frame slip away.
And your precious junk food will be gone.
Oh no!

We'll have to come up with a doggerel poem to teach kids about my existence.

Did someone say doggerel? That's my middle name!

[turns out lights, turns on flashlight under her chin]


Here is jouke, junk food fairy,
Beware of him when you make merry!
He will swipe your favorite treats,
Your cakes, your chips, and all your sweets.

Sneaks up behind you with his skinny claw,
And shoves your goodies into his maw!
Then he's gone, through a crack in the door,
And you will have ho-hos no more.

Hide your pies! Hide your fries!
jouke, through the night he flies.

Ha! That's simply great.
I especially like the detail about me escaping through a crack in the door - hohos no more.
Good work Janet!

JanetLand, that's *awesome*