MetaChat - Wait is this a real thing?

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06 January 2011

Wait is this a real thing? Someone told me I "Put on lotion like a girl" (Less creepy then it sounds)→[More:]

Apparently the way I put on post-gym skin lotion, small dabs in four places on the face then rubbing in, is girlish. Or something girl's learn, rather. Guys typically only put on lotion in the form of sunscreen, so they squirt some in their hand and then spread it. Girls, taught to put on makeup and moisturizer, place small dabs and then rub it in, so it's not wasted and so the skin isn't greasy/over-saturated.

Apparently this was a compliment.

Is this an actual thing?

post by: The Whelk at: 21:35 | 41 comments

I put on lotion like a guy. I vote "not an actual thing".

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 06 January | 21:38

I also put lotion on "like a guy" and I also vote "not an actual thing."

posted by occhiblu 06 January | 21:41

I'm with TPS and occhi.

posted by gaspode 06 January | 21:44

I don't think it's a thing. I do it both ways, but tend to do it more the way you do.

posted by CitrusFreak12 06 January | 21:54

I don't think it's a thing, but it sounds like a smart technique so I'm going to try it.

posted by Miko 06 January | 22:11

I also also put lotion on "like a guy" and I also also vote "not an actual thing."

posted by jessamyn 06 January | 22:14

dabs-and-spread?! you absolutely do. we're disappointed in you, Whelk!!

posted by Firas 06 January | 22:19

or complimenting you, depending

posted by Firas 06 January | 22:20

Guys wear lotion?

posted by octothorpe 06 January | 22:29

I'm with TPS, occhi, gaspode, Miko (apparently) and jessamyn and put lotion on like a guy. I also vote for "not an actual thing".

posted by deborah 06 January | 22:36

I would have thought that putting on lotion 'like a guy' would mean leaving it for the girls to use ;-)

posted by dg 06 January | 23:33

I put on lotion like a guy, I guess, and foundation like a girl.

And this is not a thing.

posted by punchtothehead 06 January | 23:38

Real men don't use lotion.

posted by Doohickie 06 January | 23:56

I am a girl and don't put it on that way.

But in all honesty, the way you do it strikes me as feminine-sounding.

posted by amro 07 January | 00:21

I put some in my palm and smear where I need it....I've also read someone's opinion that there's a male/female way in handling toilet paper: boys crumple, girls fold. Huh? I roll it into a ball.

posted by brujita 07 January | 00:57

*gives the Whelk the hose again*

posted by Eideteker 07 January | 01:12

My wife came home a few months back a bit confused by the fact that one of her staff said she "whistles like a man". I had no idea how one "whistles like a man" and I have no idea how one "Put(s) on lotion like a girl".

Sorry I can't help.

posted by arse_hat 07 January | 03:01

I'm a guy who does it that way because it surely leads to more even application of the lotion.

Not a real thing.

posted by knile 07 January | 06:15

I do the dab-girl thing.

posted by Senyar 07 January | 07:48

The research is incomplete, but it seems likely that lotion application is not a gender-linked trait.

posted by theora55 07 January | 09:41

Ehm, using lotion after the gym is a girl thing. :-)
But who cares...

There's a certain atmosphere on mefi and metachat where behaviour, clothes and looks are not allowed to be gender specific. And having a gender specific preference for the same is bad. But then as a species we have sexual dimorphism and similarly we can appreciate these differences amorously.

posted by jouke 07 January | 10:09

Did you dab it on with your ring finger so you don't damage your delicate under-eye skin? And always rub upward, so as not to give gravity any help? Because that's what ladies do. (Or so my grandmother told me.)

posted by jrossi4r 07 January | 10:30

But then as a species we have sexual dimorphism and similarly we can appreciate these differences amorously

1. I doubt lotion application is an innate, genetic, sex-linked difference, as opposed to a learned behavior, so I'm not sure why dimorphism of the species would be involved here.

2. We don't really just have dimorphism.

3. If sexual ardor is restricted to sex differences, how exactly do we explain same-sex attraction?

4. There's a certain atmosphere of rejecting this kind of bs on MetaChat because "Hee hee hee you X like a girl!" is boring, predictable, generally scientifically unsound, and almost always insulting at some level, if only for its underlying anti-scientific assumptions.

And that's what I have to say this morning, oh yes indeed.

posted by occhiblu 07 January | 11:02

jouke, I think it doesn't have to be an either or thing and the tone of umbrage sometimes obscures that. Like you can do things that you know are conventionally feminine and yet do it just cause it makes sense to you. And the "you're such a girl!" haters can stay mad.

posted by Firas 07 January | 11:05

I doubt lotion application is an innate, genetic, sex-linked difference, as opposed to a learned behavior, so I'm not sure why dimorphism of the species would be involved here.

learned behavior still create cultural gendered dimorphism though and it's okay to be aware of it especially when as here it has to do with differences in skin maintenance that let's face it have persisted across different cultures for a while. the ostrich approach to cultural tropes isn't any more robust than the 'it is this way so it's right' approach.

posted by Firas 07 January | 11:08

Finally, I can tell someone the Internet thinks they're full of it.

Now that I think of it, I started doing the dab after spending a lot of time hanging put backstage so ...yeah

posted by The Whelk 07 January | 11:14

Oh, lotion as gendered is utter nonsense. My SO has a condition that causes extra dry skin, and he consumes gallons of lotion. I've rarely used it - only in winter when the indoor air is so dry.

"Cultural gendered dimorphism" - is this a real termfrom somewhere? Because I don't think that's what dimorphism (systematic, recurring, heritable, physical) means. In other words, something a person can do to change the surface appearance of your body is not "dimorphism." Getting ears or navels pierced, shaving, hairstyling, clothing, makeup, tattooing - that doesn't create "dimorphism" - and skin treatments would be the same way.

posted by Miko 07 January | 11:36

Well, "sexual dimorphism" as a term has stretched in its meaning (annoyingly, at least to me) not least in the field of sex differences research. Maybe not "cultural sexual dimorphism" but certainly the term "sexually dimorphic behavior" is used more and more.

To me this is nonsensical, because of the meaning of the word dimorphism (as you pointed out Miko) but it is an actual jargon shift in the field.

posted by gaspode 07 January | 11:42

I meant it as a non-technical term, as in differences in behavior. Let's be real, the vast majority of skin care is marketed to women. I go to a cosmetics site and they're talking about kissability and bubble baths which makes me feel like this isn't copywriting aimed at me. Are we really gonna act like there isn't a product usage difference?

posted by Firas 07 January | 11:51

So, I put lotion on my hands/arms all the time because my skin will look frankensteinish in winter without it. But when it comes to putting lotion all over yourself as you step out of the shower (as I assume Whelk means in the gym and as I have started doing), I do think women do that more than men.

posted by Firas 07 January | 11:54

Oh, I know *you* mean it as a non-technical term, firas, I was just rambling.

posted by gaspode 07 January | 12:00

I slather Cetaphil cream on every inch of skin I can reach with both hands upon drying from the shower at the gym. There is correlation (not cause) between asthma and eczema (irritation and inflammation) and I do not feel I am warding off seasonal asthma but it can't hurt either.

It is probably pretty guy-like, although I refrain from smearing some on a wall then rubbing my mid-back against it, so it is not all the way to guy-ness, quite.

posted by danf 07 January | 12:09

I prefer to have someone else rub the lotion on me.

posted by JanetLand 07 January | 12:17

Thanks for the clarification, gaspode.

Let's be real, the vast majority of skin care is marketed to women.

This is true, but at the same time, skin care for men is the biggest growth area in cosmetics and has become an increasingly bigger deal over the last couple decades.

So no matter how you put it on, rest assured you're not alone.

posted by Miko 07 January | 13:02

I think it was a few days ago that I noticed just how many ointments and unguents are bread out on my bathroom counter.

posted by The Whelk 07 January | 13:18

spread out.

Bread out sounds obscene.

posted by The Whelk 07 January | 13:27

Is this an actual thing?

In my own mind, yes and no: it is a thing and it is not a thing. As soon as you said "like a woman," I knew exactly what combination of gestures that would describe. It's funny that she (and I, unconsciously) identify this as a feminine gesture but that so few other women here do. Hmm.

I suggest that it's "a thing," but not an actual thing, in the same way that "it's a thing" that women like pink fruity drinks and men like strong simple drinks, or that women like romantic comedies and men like action movies: it's a behavior that some/many people think of as being gender-specific.

It may even be "a thing" insofar as some people conform to the gendered expectations without really analyzing their conformity, which reinforces the gendered expectation, lalalalala infinity... but that it not an actual, accurate representation of individual's behavior in reality.

Data point: I put on moisturizer and/or foundation in dots as you describe but I apply sunscreen in slopping great rubs. I think you're exactly right about the purpose behind the four-dot gesture: people used to applying unguents and cosmetics to their faces do so with some precision, both because the stuff can be expensive and because the small amount used and its placement makes a difference in the finished result.

Sunscreen is different, though, at least for me: I know how much sunscreen I am supposed to use, so I just squeeze that much into my palm and use it until it's gone.

posted by Elsa 07 January | 13:48

I prefer to have someone else rub the lotion on me.

I'll be in my bunk.

posted by Eideteker 07 January | 17:02

I'll be in my bunk.

Here, you forgot your sock.

posted by danf 07 January | 18:54

No one's really addressed my accusations of "boring" and "predictable," which is kinda awesome, because it kept the discussion from being either boring or predictable. *mwah*

posted by occhiblu 08 January | 00:42

Hey! I can be as boring and predictable as --- oh. Never mind.

*mwah!*

posted by Elsa 08 January | 00:48

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