Relationship Drama I'm usually against putting relationship questions out to the interwebs, but I'm at a loss for what to do.
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Wednesday we had been discussing going out to play pool with some friends after work and he said in an email "I've gotta do stuff tonight, so no pool for me and I won't be home." I go out with our friends and text him repeatedly to see if he's done with whatever it is he was doing and ask if he wants to come meet us. He doesn't respond for the longest time, but then tells me he's still alive, but never answers my question about whether or not he'd like to come meet us.
I go home at about 3am, and he's not there. I call and text again, but get no answer. Even though I know he doesn't check his voicemails, I leave a drunken message, then eat some pizza and go to bed.
Upon waking up Thursday, I find that he's still not home. I call some more and text some more. Finally I get an answer - he's got to make a "couple calls" and then he's "headed home." I send several more text messages and make more phone calls that are still unanswered. I even called his good friend from work to see if the BF had logged in to their chat system and if the friend knew what was going on. No dice.
At this point I'm flipping out and my imagination is running away from me, so I do something I probably shouldn't have done... He always leaves his email up on our home computer. I poke through his account and find an Expedia receipt for a one-night trip to another city - airline ticket, car, and hotel. There were also several emails exchanged with a lawyer in the destination city.
The BF took a work trip a few months ago to this city, and apparently got in trouble with the local law while there. He didn't mention this to me while he was traveling, or when he came back from the trip. He had to go back this week for a court appearance.
When I got home from work last night, I confronted him about where he was without revealing that I already know or how I know. He basically avoided my questions, and upon pressing harder he said he didn't want to talk about it just yet. I expressed that I was sad, hurt, and a bit angry. This didn't change his stance and he still hasn't told me what he was actually doing.
I'm upset that he feels he has to keep this from me. We've lived together for five years and, although he doesn't need me to be his mother, I don't think his email conveyed that he wasn't going to be home at all that night. If I had gotten that impression, I would have asked more questions in the beginning of the ordeal. And this law trouble is auto-related, so it may increase our car insurance - which I pay for. Based on that reason alone I feel like he should have told me.