I'M LEAVING FOR MIAMI BEACH TOMORROW MORNING. MY SISTER IS HAVING SURGERY THERE AND I WILL BE WITH HER FOR SEVERAL DAYS. TOMORROW IS MY TENTH ANNIVERSARY AND I WILL NOT BE HERE. I'M NOT MAD, BUT SAD.

I AM FUCKING OUTRAGED BY A DOCUMENTARY I JUSTED WATCHED ON MSNBC CALLED "DEAR ZACHARY: A LETTER TO A SON ABOUT A FATHER". HOLY FUCKING SHIT, IT IS SO MESSED UP, AND I REALLY WISH I HADN'T WATCHED IT. I AM NOT NORMALLY A MORBID PERSON, BUT THIS MOVIE ACTUALLY DESTROYED MY FAITH IN HUMANITY JUST A LITTLE BIT.

FUCK YOU X FACTOR FOR TRYING TO MAKE SOME DODGY COVER OF HALLELUJAH THE XMAS NUMBER 1.

I LIKE BEER!

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MAY I WARN YOU THAT RESPONSIBILITY FUCKING SUCKS, AND IF YOU HAVE A CHANCE TO LIVE LIFE WITHOUT EVER HAVING A CHANCE TO FUCK ANYTHING UP EVER, GO AHEAD AND TAKE IT - WORK ON YOURSELF, BE A MONK, OR SOMETHING BUT DETATCHMENT FROM THE WORLD IS A GREAT IDEA I AM EXTREMELY OVER ATTACHED AT THE MOMENT!!!!

I GOT THE "AIN'T GOT NO BLUES" BLUES.
dambit

It's finals week, and I'm just too worn out to shout. Sigh.

DEAR PAPER I AM CURRENTLY WRITING,

HELLO. HOW ARE YOU?

I HATE YOU.

SINCERELY,

ELSA

I JUST LEARNED HOW TO USE THE CAPS LOCK ON MY IPOD YAAAAAAY!

I HAD A FABULOUSLY FUN DAY SHOPPING WITH MY FRIEND!! AND I ONLY HAVE THREE DAYS OF WORK BEFORE I FLY TO SEE MY FAMILY!!!!

STUPID GRAD SCHOOL APPLICATIONS WHY WON'T YOU JUST FILL YOURSELF OUT???

WHY ARE MY LIPS CRACKING EVEN THOUGH I CONSTANTLY SLATHER THEM IN AN ASSORTMENT OF LIP BALMS??? IT IS OUCHIES!!!

I AM VERY NERVOUS AND WORRIED AND SCARED AND CONFUSED ABOUT EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW SINCE I'VE GOT MY VERY FIRST PROFESSIONAL PERFORMANCE APPRAISAL TOMORROW MORNING WHERE I'M GOING TO ATTEMPT TO ASK FOR MORE MONEY WITHOUT SOUNDING LIKE A GREEDY BITCH BECAUSE SERIOUSLY, I MAKE VERY LITTLE AND 5% ISN'T A HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE AMOUNT TO BE ASKING FOR.
I'M FEELING VERY UNMOTIVATED TO DO MY FINAL EXAM, BUT AT LEAST I'VE FINISHED 2/3 OF IT AND NOW I JUST HAVE TO SIT DOWN AND DO THE BIBLIOGRAPHY SECTION, WHICH IS GOING TO BE A LOT OF DAMN WORK.
I'M THINKING ABOUT WHERE I WANT TO GO FOR MY SUMMER VACATIONS AND WHILE I HAVE PLANS, I FEEL BAD ABOUT ASKING MY HOMIE WHAT SHE WANTS TO DO BECAUSE SHE'S UNEMPLOYED AND THERE'S PRECISELY DICKALL I CAN DO TO HELP OUT HER SITUATION.
I WISH I WAS MOVED OUT ALREADY BUT POPS KEEPS TRYING TO TALK ABOUT MAKING PLANS FOR THIS CONDO AND I JUST HAVE THIS TERRIBLE FEELING IN MY GUT THAT SINCE I'LL JUST BE PAYING RENT TO HIM THAT MY MOTHER WILL WANT TO PULL SHENANIGENS LIKE RANDOMLY SHOWING UP AND GOING THROUGH MY SHIT BUT I CAN'T REALLY AFFORD TO MOVE ANYWHERE ELSE UNTIL THIS PLACE THAT I SENT A DEPOSIT TO WILL HOPEFULLY OPEN UP IN AUGUST.

I DO NOT WANT TO WRITE REPORTS THIS WEEK. I DON'T. DO. NOT.

RECEPTION FOR ART SHOW WAS A LOT OF FUN AND THE SHOWE ITSELF IS BEING VERY WELL RECEIVED!

SEVEN LADIES SHOWING VERY DIVERSE THINGS THAT SOMEHOW ALL WENT WONDERFULLY TOGETHER. WINE AND SNACKS!

THERE WAS AN ARTICLE ABOUT US IN FRIDAY'S NEWSPAPER, AND THEY PICKED ONE OF MY PAINTINGS FOR THE FRONT PAGE CORNER BLURB!

I HAVE AN ON-SITE JOB INTERVIEW FOR A BIG DEFENSE CONTRACTOR ON TUESDAY. I'M MORE THAN A LITTLE WEIRDED OUT BY IT BUT AT LEAST OBMAMA IS GOING TO BE IN CHARGE OF THE MILITARY. I'VE BEEN OUT OF WORK FOR SIX WEEKS NOW AND THIS IS ONLY MY SECOND INTERVIEW. THE JOB MARKET SUCKS RIGHT NOW, I KEEP GETTING TOLD THAT THEY'RE INTERESTED BUT CAN'T HIRE ANYONE RIGHT NOW.

Gomichild - try just some plain olive oil. Or alternately, you might not be hydrated enough. All the waxy lipbalm stuff (of which I am also a fan) doesn't work if your lips simply don't have enough moisture. They merely serve to hold in that moisture.

Also, if your lips have dead stuff flaking off, maybe some veeeeery gentle exfoliation. Some sugar in olive oil is the simplest (plus it's hydrating!).

I'M REALLY TIRED BECAUSE OMG I WALKED FOR FIVE HOURS TODAY ON A CHRISTMAS BIRD COUNT AND IT WAS COLD AND I SLIPPED IN THE MUD AND WE DIDN'T SEE ANY SUPERFANTASTIC BIRDS ALTHOUGH ANOTHER GUY GOT A RED PHALAROPE WHICH USUALLY IS UP IN THE ARCTIC OR ACTUALLY THIS TIME OF YEAR WAY WAY WAY SOUTH AS IN WHO KNOWS WHERE JUST AS SOUTH AS IT CAN BE TO BE AS COLD AS IT CAN BECAUSE APPARENTLY THE RED PHALAROPE IS A CRAZY-ASSED BIRD BECAUSE WHO WANTS THEIR FEET WET AND COLD ALL THE TIME WTF?

(DEEP BREATH)

MY GOOD FRIEND WHO ESSENTIALLY STOPPED TALKING TO ME FOR THREE YEARS WHILE HE WAS DATING SOMEONE HAS BEGUN TALKING TO ME AGAIN BECAUSE HE AND HIS GIRLFRIEND BROKE UP AND NOW HE HAS MORE TIME. UNFORTUNATELY, HE'S CHOOSING TO ENTER INTO *ANOTHER* DRAMA-FILLED RELATIONSHIP, AND I HAVE TO BALANCE SUPPORTING HIM AND NOT SUPPORTING DRAMA. BECAUSE DRAMA SUCKS AMIRITE? BAD DRAMA. BAD!

ALSO, MY BACK FUCKING ITCHES!

GOING TO SEE JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR WITH MY FAVORITE GUY TONIGHT AND I'M STILL IN A FOUL MOOD. MUST STOPPIT, SERIOUSLY. NOW. SOMEONE SLAP ME TWICE REALLY HARD.

OMFG MY POOCHES ARE TEH AWESOME. WE ROMPED OUTSIDE IN THE SNOW IN THE 5 DEGREE WEATHER AND PLAYED AND STUFF. IT WAS SOOOO MUCH FUN, AND IT DIDN'T EVEN FEEL COLD AT ALL. MY POOCHES ARE THE BESTEST IN THE WORLD!!!!!!

OOooo thanks unsurprising.

IT'S MONDAY HERE, BUT TOO FUCKIN BAD.

I AM SO TIRED. I'VE BEEN WORKING HERE FOR 10 MONTHS AND HAVE ONLY HAD ABOUT 4.5 DAYS OFF IN THAT TIME. I WANT HOLIDAYS, AND HAVE TWO WEEKS OFF COMING UP - BUT THAT'S STILL 4.5 DAYS AWAY.

I JUST REALISED A COUPLE OF THINGS I SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN ORGANISED EARLIER, AND NOW THEY'RE LEFT TO THE LAST MINUTE, AND THAT MAKES ME GRUMPY.

I DON'T REALLY WANT TO BE HERE TODAY. MY BED SOUNDS COMFY AND COSY AND I WOULDN'T MIND SOME SLEEP. WHY CAN'T WEEKENDS BE LONGER?

ALSO - WHAT HAPPENED TO SUMMER? IT'S FUCKING FREEZING. I'M WEARING BOOTS. GOT SO CHILLED DURING THE MASSIVE ICY STORM ON SATURDAY THAT I THINK I'M COMING DOWN WITH A COLD. DON'T WANT TO GET SICK BEFORE THIS WEDDING AND MY HOLIDAY. AT LEAST NEXT WEEK I'LL BE UP IN SUNNY (HA!) QUEENSLAND.

HURRAY FOR THE RETURN OF MY GRANDMOTHER'S CANCER, WHICH THANKS TO MY COMPLETE ASSHOLE OF AN UNCLE, HAS BEEN ALLOWED TO PROGRESS FOR SEVERAL MONTHS. LUCKILY SHE DOESN'T SEEM TO BE HAVING MUCH PAIN, BUT WE DON'T KNOW YET WHAT TREATMENT IS GOING TO INVOLVE. ASSUMING HE DOESN'T DO SOMETHING TO BLOCK HER FROM COMING HERE TO SEE THE SPECIALIST SHE NEEDS. ASSHOLE.

MY ENTIRE BODY HAS BECOME ONE BIG ITCHY BUT THANKFULLY INVISIBLE RASH (EXCEPT FOR AROUND MY EYES, WHICH ARE SWOLLEN AND A LOVELY SHADE OF MAUVE) AS I ENJOY THE HAPPY WINTER VISIT OF ECZEMA. USING THE CORTISONE CREAM SPARINGLY, BUT THE OLIVE OIL LIBERALLY, AS THE LATTER IS THE ONLY THING THAT DOESN'T SEEM TO IRRITATE MY SKIN RIGHT NOW. MY NEW OLIVEY SCENT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE A FREAK, AND FOR ONCE I AM GLAD NO ONE GETS CLOSE ENOUGH TO ME ON ANY GIVEN DAY TO NOTICE. BUT NOT REALLY.

SEANYBOY, I HATE THE X-FACTOR TOO BUT THERE ARE FAR WORSE THINGS THAN A LEONARD COHEN SONG BEING NUMBER ONE AT CHRISTMAS.

AND IN A WAY IT'S A GOOD THING BECAUSE I READ IN THE PAPER TODAY THAT WHEN HE WAS TRAINING TO BECOME A BUDDHIST MONK A FEW YEARS AGO, LEONARD COHEN'S MANAGER STOLE ALL HIS MONEY, AND HE STANDS TO MAKE ABOUT £250,000 OFF THIS RECORD, SO, SOUL-SUCKING AS X-FACTOR MIGHT BE, IT'LL DO LEONARD SOME GOOD IN HIS OLD AGE.