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13 November 2008

Eating McDonald's french fries leads to a question... →[More:]I know they are bad for me, really. But sometimes really bad food is really awesome...like Monty Cristo sandwiches, and I don't mean those wimpy pan fried sandwiches, I mean batter dipped and deep fried 10,000 calories of delicious doom! Or cheese-in-a-can on Wheat Thins. Maybe Doritos with bean dip is your thing, or mac and cheese with catsup (ew). So, what kind of cheese food product, high calorie concoction, or otherwise "welfare fare" does it for you, regardless of the stomach ache, angioplasty or, dare I say, impending loss of self-esteem?

post by: sakura at: 19:38 | 34 comments

cheese-in-a-can on Wheat Thins

This!!!! Any sort of fake cheese, really. Mmmm, cheese fries. Now I'm hungry, damn you!

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 13 November | 19:43

I have said this before and I will say it again. Kraft mac'n'cheese from the blue box, mixed with canned tuna fish and coated in grated Kraft parmesan cheese from the green can until it's all kind of pasty and yum. This is not proud food or good food but it is comfort food.

posted by Fuzzbean 13 November | 19:44

Debs instant Onion flavoured mash potato with cheese, butter and milk. Oh so healthy, but YUM!!

Also, Mi Goreng noodles with a fried egg, extra shallots, and an onion / mushrooms tossed through. Mmmmmmmmmmm.

Or Thai Soup. Hot and Spicy Flavour.

posted by jonathanstrange 13 November | 19:57

I also love spray cheese. I used to babysit for people that always had cheese in a can and Triscuits. It made babysitting enjoyable.

Velveeta shells and cheese with peas is yummy.

Velveeta and Rotel tomatoes to make fake queso dip is also de-lish.

One year in high school I had a thing for buying a small bag of plain Lays chips and a Snickers bar. They were always eaten simultaneously.

I used to like Dinty Moore Beef Stew and Hostess fruit pies when I was a kid. I'm not sure if I still like them because I haven't had them in years and years.

I like stuff like Frosted Flakes, Swiss Cake Rolls, and Eggo waffles but don't buy those either. And Toaster Strudel and Poptarts. And Pilsbury Crescent rolls and dinner rolls. My mother never bought this kind of food but when I could get my hands on them it was warm heaven. She did buy us Oatmeal Creme Pies on occasion. I love an Oatmeal Creme Pie.

Today my husband and kids and I were in the SamsClub. They wanted to buy Poptarts and I actually uttered the words, "No. We're not a Poptart family." As you can see I am a snob and no fun. :-)

posted by LoriFLA 13 November | 19:58

Liverwurst.

I love liverwurst. And I am not ashamed.

posted by BitterOldPunk 13 November | 20:04

Pringles, I can't leave them alone if I have them in the house. A tube will disappear within a couple of hours.

posted by King of Prontopia 13 November | 20:13

I love liverwurst too, BOP. Damn, that stuff is good on rye.

posted by Fuzzbean 13 November | 20:25

I ignore health, questions of 'good taste' or whatever and just eat whatever the hell i want.

posted by jonmc 13 November | 20:32

omg Pringles here, too. A tube to me is a "single-serving" and I will inhale @ one go. I used to work at P&G and we had free-range Pringles in the cafeteria and for meetings, oh man that's what I miss the most about that job.

I will hesitantly admit to liking pork rinds as well. The cheap ones in the red bag. But I haven't had any for almost a decade so that makes it okay, right?

Cool Ranch Doritos are like lfr Kryptonite.

posted by lonefrontranger 13 November | 20:33

Biscuits and gravy with an order of sausage.

posted by Ardiril 13 November | 20:38

Chex Mix for me. Sometimes I'll get lucky and the bag will have "Bonus" bits that are over saturated with the mixing "stuff" and sometimes you'll get a bag full of "bonus" bits, and it's a good day.

posted by hellojed 13 November | 20:53

sakura, honey, just consult jonmc's flickr stream. He speaks the truth.

posted by pieisexactlythree 13 November | 20:54

My ex worked in a Smith's crisps factory, and hot potato chips, pre-flavouring, are delicious. The factory stunk, though.

Note - British crisps, Australian and US chips, just hot. NOT Australian hot chips (British chips, US fries). Gah this gets confusing sometimes.

Hot chips (fries) and gravy is my latest comfort food. Yum.

posted by goo 13 November | 21:22

OOooh... me too goo - Lord of the Fries does hand cut chips (hot, not crisps) with gravy and cheese... MMmmmmmmmmmmmm....

posted by jonathanstrange 13 November | 21:25

Hot chips (fries) and gravy is my latest comfort food. Yum.

Add cheese and here in the US they're known as 'Disco Fries.'

posted by jonmc 13 November | 21:30

croutons dipped in ranch dressing. since I was knee high to a grasshopper it has been my go-to savory snack.

posted by kellydamnit 13 November | 21:43

If we're talking fake cheese joy, brown toast with butter *and* cheez whiz. Every 6 months or so I'll get a wicked craving for this and go through a whole damned jar in an embarrassingly short time. Also, celery stalks filled with cheez whiz. But really? The toast. And yes, the butter is essential.

Non-cheez joy would be Lindsay's pitted black olives. When I was a kid, I'd put them on my fingers and pretend they were busbies and my fingers were the Queen's Guard. Now I can't fit them on my fingers (or I would, secretly, and march them around) but I'll eat a whole damned can given the chance.

posted by elizard 13 November | 22:58

A diner burger with chedder and grilled onions on toast.

posted by octothorpe 13 November | 23:01

Frosted Flakes. Cheez-It Party Mix. Funfetti frosting straight from the can.

posted by sperose 14 November | 01:40

French fries, yes. Fat, skinny, pleasingly plump or willowy, skins on or off. I had some last night with keftadakia, which are sort of like Greek fried meatballs or something - so awesome when done right.

Any chips, but I really like plain, no fancyshmancy flavors or flavours.

There is nothing that isn't better without some kind of cheese in, on, or around it.

I love Oreos. I love them more because for a long time they weren't available here, so now I have trouble resisting them.

But what I really, really want is poutine. Never had it, and it's pretty much the sum of my desire.

posted by taz 14 November | 01:54

Omfg, agreeing with Taz. I really really want to try poutine. I've never had it, but it sounds SO GOOD. The other day there was a question about it on askme and *homersimpsondroooool*

And I really love those shrimp dumpling things you get at Dim Sum.

posted by moonshine 14 November | 02:14

Icecream is my most common comfort food. I can eat an embarrassingly large amount of it in a short space of time and will often eat enough to make myself feel sick.

Otherwise, toast with peanut butter made just so. You have to toast the bread until it is exactly right - crispy without being hard and evenly browned. You have to have the butter and peanut butter ready, containers opened and a knife in the perfect spot to pick it up. Butter must be spread evenly right to the edges of each piece and must be followed immediately by a thin layer of peanut butter that also goes right to the very edge of the crust all the way around. The secret is to get all this done while the toast is still hot so the butter and peanut butter melt. Don't bother with all that poncy cutting the bread in half or plates or any of that girly crap - place the stack of toast (6-8 pieces is a goodly amount, but you'll need a four-slice toaster or it gets cold) flat on the palm of your non-eating hand and go for it. If you take more than four bites per slice, you obviously weren't hungry in the first place.

I've put way too much thought into this, haven't I?

posted by dg 14 November | 04:23

dg - my soulmate, I swear I thought that I was the only butter&peanutbutter on toast fan. it has to be done *exactly* like that!

posted by dabitch 14 November | 04:41

I don't have a toaster, so that scuttles some of potentially awesome stuff. Sure, I could buy a toaster, but I already have the Brita filter pitcher, the sandwich press, and the blender shelved because they take up too much counter space... plus, it would just make it that much easier for me to eat stuff I shouldn't. :(

posted by taz 14 November | 06:12

One of the first things I'm going to have when I get back to Vancouver is the poutine from the french fry place on Commercial Drive. Oh yeah, baby. I'll write you all about it, taz & moonshine ;) 'Course there are those who would argue that true poutine can only be found in Quebec, but these guys do a pretty good job; they use actual cheese curds (as the good lord intended) rather than grated cheese (which is an abomination), and their fries absolutely rock.

dg & dabitch have made me feel so much better about being unable to eat pb on toast without butter. And yeah, that's the way it must be done, though I do use a plate and cut the toast in half. Diagonally, 'cause it tastes better that way.

posted by elizard 14 November | 09:26

Fried bivalves & hush puppies. Fried vegetables. But I gotta chime in as a lover of the velveeta/rotelle melt, which probably has even less redeeming qualities. So easy cheezy beautiful.

posted by rainbaby 14 November | 09:48

frosted flakes, Fritos (the big ones)& bean dip, canned baked beans on toast, sausage gravy on biscuits, noodles with butter & poppy seeds. Toast with butter & jelly, or honey. Toast with butter (not too much) peanut butter & marmite. chicken pot pie, even the affordable swansons kind with 2 peas and 1 carrot per pie.

posted by theora55 14 November | 11:04

Potted meat on toasted bread or liverwurst on same. Vienna sausages (and they're low-sodium enough for my diet!). Generic mac 'n' cheese, but only with real butter and 2% milk.

I used to buy $1 Mama Celeste's pizzas by the week, but I can't do that anymore because a single pizza contains 45% of a regular person's daily sodium intake and I'm trying to keep any food servings under 30%. But those microwave pizzas are the reason why I actually prefer regular NY-style pizzas now, as long as there's a goodly amount of sauce and cheese.

Damnit... I want pizza now.

posted by TrishaLynn 14 November | 11:20

Every year I find myself craving candycorns. Invariably, within an hour of eating them, I remember why I don't eat things like that normally - I feel shaky and queasy. But by the time Halloween rolls around again, I've forgotten the lessons of the past year and repeat the incident.

posted by pieisexactlythree 14 November | 12:02

Best thing I will never try again...

Whenever I smell Krispy Kreme donuts, I NEED sausage. We got the bright idea to act on this desire. (It MUST be Krispy Kreme! No other donut will do!)

Basically, cut the donuts in half to create a bun. Insert the sausage patty in between. Cut in quarters to make bite size pieces. Eat one quarter. Revel in the blissful hallucination of angels opening up the gates of cloudy, shiny, greasy heaven. Roll on the floor in extreme pain as your gut rebels against the vast amounts of sugar and fat that you thought it was a good idea to try to digest. After the gall bladder removal, remind yourself that it WAS WORTH IT!!!!

For those who are interested, I'm not the only one who came up with this.

posted by sakura 14 November | 14:04

Hmm, Monte Cristos, liverwurst, pork rinds, Vienna sausages, and peanut-butter-and-butter sandwiches are already covered. I can add Beanee Weenee, Twinkies, and cherry Hostess Fruit Pies.

posted by halonine 14 November | 18:37

I make grilled cheese sandwiches using ciabata bread and Tillamook extra sharp white cheddar. With butter, of course. Nothing like the amazing cheddars I sampled in England but its what we have.

Love to make a four cheese alfredo sauce with parmesian, romano, asiago, and whatever other wonderful Italian cheese is handy.

Sometimes, though, I just want some cheese dip and tortilla chips. For dinner.

posted by trinity8-director 14 November | 19:04

... I do use a plate and cut the toast in half. Diagonally, 'cause it tastes better that way.
Well, sure, but only if you are in polite company. Diagonally, for sure - as long as you eat the corners off first and make sure you establish the "best bit" to eat last (this applies whether or not you slice, btw).

posted by dg 16 November | 16:28

Hoghead cheese. As icky and gel-y as it sounds. And I can eat it by the pound with dry Saltine crackers.

posted by ColdChef 30 November | 09:56

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