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27 October 2008

update on that tire slashing here locally was teenagers. From the next county over. It figures.
I'm going to see McCain tomorrow and am NOT gonna park on Wilkes Road.
" Both individuals stated they would dress in all white tuxedos and wear top hats during the assassination attempt," the court complaint states.

It's wrong that that made me laugh, right? It's been a bad day, I'll take whatever humor I can get.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 27 October | 16:45
Huh. Can't help but wonder if this is an October Surprise, meant to destabilize confidence...
posted by Miko 27 October | 16:45
what's McCain doing in North Carolina one week before the vote? doesn't he have battleground states to worry about?
posted by matteo 27 October | 17:34
Hey, guess what? Two MORE teenagers from Tennessee and Arkansas just got busted by the ATF for plotting to assassinate Obama and take out an entire African-American school!

they also planned to slash Obama's tires after they shot him.
posted by matteo 27 October | 17:34
LT, I just saw that story, and like Pinks, I couldn't help but laugh.
Bunnyfire, something tells me your tires are safe.
posted by msali 27 October | 17:41
Two white teenagers setting out to behead 102 African Americans and THEN going after Obama. Okay, that does not sound like a credible threat. But then, equally hysterical headlines happened about the terrorist wannabees (I'm not sure if they were from Florida or Georgia) who made "plans" to do various bombings, tried to contact AlQueda and got an FBI undercover agent instead. And the Canadian terrorists who wanted to take Stephen Harper's head off. If these are the dangerous plots that Law Enforcement is uncovering, I, for one, feel perfectly safe. (And hey, the ATF? Did the FBI and Secret Service just not have time to bother with this one?)
posted by wendell 27 October | 18:01

MOM, stands at counter, flashing through wilted vegetables at top speed with enormous chef's knife

Two KIDS come running into the scene from off-camera.
They are both with shaved heads and dressed in paramilitary tuxedo drag.

KID 1: HEY MOM! MOM MOM MOM! Timmy's going out later to drive real fast at Obama and shoot at him! Can I go, too?

KID 2: It's okay, Mrs. Schesselman, my folks let me use the car for hate crimes all the time!


MOM scratches at her face vigorously, then turns back with shaky hands to slicing up everything on the counter with the chef's knife.


They tear out of the kitchen and we FADE OUT to background noise of burnt tires and gunshots, then sirens.

posted by Lipstick Thespian 27 October | 18:02
i'm glad they were caught, it's exactly what i expected to happen. Now, as an example, they'll at least somewhat neutered the like for a bit.
Us witches of the cyber covens have been looking for them for days.
posted by ethylene 27 October | 19:15
Throw a have in there to hold.
Suffer us not to live or ever explain the rest of that passage.
posted by ethylene 27 October | 19:23
what's McCain doing in North Carolina one week before the vote? doesn't he have battleground states to worry about?

posted by Miko 27 October | 21:03
Well, we know Obama will definitely create a few jobs. If the campaign is any indication they'll have to double the size of the ATF and secret service to keep him safe from the racist wingnuts.
posted by kellydamnit 27 October | 22:33
Plus, garages will need help with all the tire plugs.
posted by Miko 27 October | 22:41
I get to sit in the good seats tomorrow, apparently. But that means I have to wear my proper Republican dark blue suit. With heels. Ugh.

(I have to admit I kinda like my state being a battleground state. It's nice to get some attention from all the candidates. )
posted by bunnyfire 27 October | 22:59
why heels? even in tiered seating your feet would be behind the back of the person in front of you.
posted by kellydamnit 27 October | 23:03
I don't have cute flats that match.

I was gonna wear my cute heeled short boots but they wouldn't look good with the outfit.
posted by bunnyfire 27 October | 23:10
The heels are for standing on the necks of poor people.
posted by box 28 October | 09:30
Ouch, box.
posted by danostuporstar 28 October | 09:35
"If it weren't for those meddling teenagers!"
"Ruh roh."
posted by ethylene 28 October | 10:11
Here is a very simple math problem that is beyond my skills. || OMG Blue Bunny Crunch