I hate to break this to you, hadjiboy, but for leading people on, those two in your story are fairly lightweight. You ain't seen nothin' yet.

I think you're being over-dramatic, but I totally understand not wanting to be around people like that.

I've let friendships die for similar reasons. No drama, no fight – I just quietly stopped seeing them.

Sí. Nobody's perfect, much can and should be forgiven - and few people's flaws are immediately noticeable (at least not the people that one tends to develop a friendship with) - but when you discover cruel (or destructive) behavior, best just to drop the person without a fuss, and put them out of your mind.

It doesn't help to ponder the meaning, as far as I can tell, unless one has a professional interest. You just learn to reserve your trust a bit, learn to recognize some warning signs, and swiftly, surgically, excise the bullies, the plotters, the drama addicts, and the vampires as soon as you are able to spot them. Spend that energy on positive things, instead.

Taz hit the nail on the head, hadjiboy. Heed her wisdom.

I'd skip hanging out with that crowd, too, hadjiboy. I think the energy you surround yourself with is the energy you end up absorbing, whether it's the taz list (great list, btw!) or nihilistic TV programs. T

Though that kind of cynicism and jadedness and negativity felt very comfortable when I was younger; I felt more grown-up, just "knew" that that's just how life was! It's hard, man! And therefore felt more impervious to emotional harm. /derail

But I also understand when people justifying using the users. Using other people's actions to justify bad behavior from me is a cycle that ends up poisonous to me, but I certainly understand the impulse.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'd stay away from that scenario for my own mental-emotional-spiritual health, and not because I'm certain that what they're doing is so horrible.